I'm Not Your Choice

Chapter 9

What is life about? life is about how much we are worth. Our goals and sincere.

What is our value until we are considered worthy of accompanying someone.

Yes.apapula me. Just a child of ordinary people, my dreams are too high..

Think "CANDRA ADIWINATA" will love me? dream altitude.

Your focus is now to make money, to buy a house. Deposit so that every month mama still get money and no need to sell again.

My mom's health is also down. Sugar and Tensi disease more and more recur.I can not see him tormented with drugs that much.

*hp reads

"*hallo, why brother?"

"els.mama Masul IGD!!"

"sister.kak why else mama?? just 2 weeks mama back sister.why mama???!!" I panicked and went straight out of my work room.I went into the women's locker and continued the conversation.

"all night mama ate as usual.but only mama said dizzy. and mama.mama..."

"mama why brother!!!??? BROTHER!!"

"Huuhuuf.mu.mama's mouth starts to tug to the right of Els."

"..." I stared silently at my big mirror..

"i'm late to my mom's house. Mama can't move her left side Els.Mama's doctor's diagnosis was a STRoke attack!!"

eyes glaring! "what brother? brother ni I immediately back semarang. brother calm yes. brother main calm. kasian brother Benny if brother panic. brother can not control emotions."

"Yes deck, please cementin brother."

I hung up on my brother.

I rushed into Mr. Setyawan's room. "please apologize Mr. Setyawan and Ms. Amel. I want to ask for a moment."

"iya El.Install why? what was? calm down you're panicking."

"what sir, my mom..my mom...I'm not calling me.my mom..he's been hit by a stroke sir..."

"...."

" waduh.have you brought the hospital?" ask Miss Amel.

"already.but the position is a bit late sir.my sister does not know my mother fell at home and the position of my mother's mouth has begun to stiff...I want to leave from Friday."

"LEAVE?!?? You have a responsibility to report to Owner El and the owner only believes you. tomorrow Thursday there is also a meeting with Mr. Antok, Louise and Candra. you did not come me how???" Mr. Setyawan panicked.

"this sir.report I have made. if you like, I did not take the train to come here for the meeting. finished my meeting back semarang again."

"father buyin or Elsa tickets.he wants to come back here tea already Alhamdulilah tau mr. liyeer iye ta." Ms. Amel began to feel angry at Mr. Setyawan.

"yes well you I bought a ticket PP economy yes."

"Tea rattles of yak rice!! mama he tea sick sir. in fact bought the plane.even crete economy." Ms. Amel grumbled.

"already gausah sir, the important thing is that I can permission to thank you sir."

I go home packing, I don't know what I'm going to ride later.I definitely have to go home!

I have to go home to see my mom!

handing over my mom with Martha's sister is not a good idea.

she is busy in her world with her husband.

On himself.

but if I'm in semarang.I can't get a big salary and a position that quickly rises.My competitors are a lot in semarang. More and more hotels.

the Gambir station

"there is a ticket to Semarang that will depart" I told the Karcis officer

"stay 1 train tour at a price of 800 thousand mba. this is faster 3 hours distance."

mahalaha..."yes already mba 1 in the name of Elsa Nirmala, this is my Ktp."

the officer named Nanik started writing and giving a printed ticket with my name....Elsa Nirmala's..

on the way I only remembered the words - said mama "you who are smart to take care of yourself. Jakarta is cruel, they will not succumb to you. You have to beat! see your sister has been almost 9 years in Jakarta. What is the result? just bring home husband right.that's jakarta.successful ato failed...

you must be a strong woman.You must not lose to men. keep trust in work. keep believing in Allah.Everything in protection and Ridhonya.then your life is light Deck.."

so great was my mother's hope in her youngest child.The child she really did not expect.

well.from the womb I've faced rejection from my own mother.

I remember when my mom hit me when I was accused of making cash when I was in elementary school.

mama said "you are a child of price!! it is hard to be born!! born also does not bring fortune!! you feel this..Hiiihihh!!! (mama keeps hitting me)"

"mah already! STOPPPP!!" Papa.mengaged mama while going to hit a rattan on my shoulder.

"Look at that kid you're teaching! know him."

"silence ma...let's ask first, dek....what happened.?"

mama got on the black and swung the rattan again on my back.

"NEVER!!!! STOP OR YOU I BEAT TO DEATH!!!!!"

dad was furious at that time.they were a big fuss and only the words regret mom gave birth to me, which continued to say..

indeed I have never been the one chosen them as a favorite child.don't be dear, I used to take care of everything myself.

I change my own clothes, wash my clothes, clean the house even until midnight I sometimes still iron my clothes while studying and become a teacher tutoring. because I don't have a lot of pocket money given.

my brother, whatever he always gets. New clothes, new HP and no day without shopping for it. Papa - Mama is so pampering sister. until when everything runs out. Brother cannot accept, that now is the time for us to stand alone.

Indeed, after papa left and brother fled to Jakarta, mama can change a little with me. although I can not pour my heart out to mama. I better keep everything myself.....

I'm used to it myself....

********

"sister.mama how?"

"that's the deck. I tangent after mama came home, who would care for him. I'm busy, you in Jakarta. Do you want to take care of your mom?"

"meaning brother? what about my job? not brother dapet brother Benny, children people have, right. use a sister can not brother?"

Martha drinks a little coffee in front of her. "i'm the same Benny wants to go abroad. We want a vacation around the world.Mumpung Benny dapet big project! That's why mama just fucked me."

"sister.what's wrong sister temeni mama. or find a nurse aka nurse so."

"dad!! you put a good ear - yes!"

"..."

"Mama's got a stroke! second time also now. mama is already hard to walk. if mama in my house.my house is a mess later, mama is not disabled can not walk alone.pipe.pupup how?? I have moved to the Nursing Home. Out of my money takes care of people stroke.Mana in-laws I hate if the house smells just as messy..."

"sister..kalo I can have my own house. mama will I take a brother.but I am still pioneering my career kak. please lah.mama it's our mother brother. let's just say that now we're sowing the rice fields for us later.."

Martha grew tired of hearing her adek. "Gini deh lo kasih gw every month 10 million. I will find nuns and I let you stay with me. although you know I often go, I will find a 24-hour nurse for her."

"okay! I can do the important thing mama don't go to the Nursing Home. mama's still got us."

Martha was just her as if she didn't care about her sister.

I walked to my mom's room. Mama is still unconscious. 'ma.adek here.adek tomorrow want to go to the office for a while yes ma. mama must be healthy again. I still have not proven that I am a child that is not free mama born.the child that mama hates this, it is the child that loves to mama. I even willing ma...kalo mama want me tuker same mama now.because mama already gave me life and brought me born.'

I kept looking at my mom, how skinny my mom is now.

10 million a month.....

my salary runs out if this is Martha's way.I have to get extra money for this. indeed all the drugs and therapies mama not covered by the Government Help Card, but at least with my money, but at least with my money, Martha will treat my mother well..

*The next day....

"sus.i went to the office first. if there was anything about this mama no Hp me and my brother.my brother today was a bit busy maybe noon here,."

"Good ma'am. I keep the data." Sister put my data on the computer.

"thank you, I'll stay."

"thank you back, ma'am"

I walked back to Jakarta.it seems I forgot what a slumber is. Importantly look for an additional 10 million for your needs after this..

in the carriage I fell asleep.I dreamed about the young prince who treated me like a beautiful princess.how his embrace was like a beautiful dream.but..."hey you need money, right, you should marry me right away! inget the fate of your mama.."

I woke up immediately!! 'Candra's insolent! why enter the dream gw,ngancurin doang.'

*In the Sindur meeting room

"well.somewhat progress from the last 6 journals I received. I like the concept of Setyawan. modern.but do not leave the impression of Hotel Aryah as a Classic 5-star hotel" said Mr. Louise.

"well sir thank you, this is actually from the cooperation of our team sir.the purchase and payment part that gets along too sir."

" good!!! Keep them. They are assets." said Mr. Louise.

"miss Elsa is in her. Is it sleeping?" Candra broke the silence.

sure enough, I feel tired 3 days I haven't slept watching mom continue..

Candra stood up from her seat.."ssst.." said Candra to the others.

Candra walked up to me. muttering "the bedbug's bottom." I sure as hell didn't wake up with Candra's whisper.

"well, Louise called Toni, said get the car ready. Thanks....."

everyone looks at each other. Candra kept smiling and ssseethh...

..

I'm already in a position in the Candra sling.Daffidoff fragrance stick to Candra clothes make Elsa more soundly sleep.Warm Candra lull calm Elsa.

Candra went by with Elsa. Everyone glared at her eyes.

what's going on between them??? suspecting each other who came at that time. "this is a secret, he wants me to take between where he should sleep. This is a secret, if it Leaks!! Watch out for you and your family in charge." message Candra before she gets out.

Elsa is still asleep in Candra's arms, a comfort she never felt again.