BETWEEN YOU HE AND ME

a reassuring atmosphere

"sorry I have troubled you so much" mas imam told my husband and I. I was a little uncomfortable while there was a mas priest here, not because of the feeling of the heart just that I was a little awkward whether what was clear all the memories were still clearly drawn in my brain, from the first start to know, backstreet that time because I was still a student who just entered the early semester, until the end of his decided to get married even though he had not graduated to become a student with mediocre conditions at that time because mas imam was just an ordinary factory worker whose salary was right for contracting, eating, and, even when I started pregnant still imagined that time until the end I graduated with a pretty predicate that makes her proud but now all just become memories after we have a lot of children, he said, I never thought that until now I could still shed tears when I remembered everything.

There was a speck of annoyance, anger, even emotion when I remembered how sick I was when he left her without any words at all, I cried but I could what??? The pain is only I can feel it, and from then on I can only promise that I will reap success to the top regardless of the risk. Awakened all my prayers thanks to the creator's generosity for me, I give a little slap to him now that I don't know if I can be as successful as this now, I can be, it's just that I haven't dared to go back to my homeland to meet my 2 parents. It was not the intention of showing off just to tell me that I was the one they were hurting and this was the proof of the pain they were putting on my heart.

Don't want to be arrogant just feel like people have been hurt too much until the moment I fell down they got rid of me. until I remember all the details of everything that happened in the past that left a scar that will never disappear even though my body has returned to my creator. Now I'm unceasingly grateful that I can achieve what I want is not easy, but I'm used to fighting for my children, I'm the one who used to be trivial now I prove I can walk faster than they thought, because I believe and believe as hard as any life I have experienced, God never sleeps for me who always needs Him in every step I take even today He is still always my side.

"yan, I'm sorry" the priest said to me as I sat alone on the back porch of the house unbeknownst to my husband.

"sorry why?" I asked as if I had no problem. That's one of the advantages of sagittarius even though it is facing severe problems it can still cover with a indifferent attitude and can still smile sweetly.

"mas proud yan, you can prove your words" he told me that I heard as if people who are inferior "not wrong children choose to live with you here, you give luxury to them"

"no mas" I immediately pruned his conjecture because I think he can only see from the outside only "I don't train children with glory because I don't have all of it. I trained them independently just as I used to be in the village, I did not change my teachings, even with me who now I am more strict with them, I showed the firstborn that life is bitter if we can only hang ourselves to others, I told her the meaning of hard work to be able to escape the difficulties and now the firstborn sometimes take part time in the cafeteria where her school while her spare time and I gave her a small capital for her open a business so he knows how hard it is to make money."

"then where is the firstborn?" ask her who just realized that her child is not home

"since dawn he went to his place of business" I said

"what's he doing?" ask her "what doesn't interfere with her concentration of learning"

"i know, he knows better than me" I replied briefly

"you're different now yan" he told me "you're not what you used to be, that sounds jolly"

"because I who used to have gone a long way, now all that is left is me and the pain makes me more able to tread the bittersweet life" I replied

"i'm sorry yan" he said

"there's nothing wrong, all the past and I don't want to talk about it back" I said more sharply at her "I've given everything that's happened because it's all happened"

"once again I'm sorry yan" he said "just like I didn't leave you maybe we're not like this, maybe I won't lose everything"

"already mas" I wrote to the priest mas "i males his horror, all of it has gone through no need to be revealed"

"iii yes I'm sorry, I just carried the guilt to you" she said "are you happy?"

"does she mean?" I asked him back a question he himself knew the answer to. "yes of course I'm happy dong, a strange question"

"is she happier now than she was with me?" hatch it by looking down "you still like nulis too? You know, his hobbies haven't changed"

"yes, I didn't change" I replied briefly. I always write, writing for me is a medium for me without people knowing who I am.

"still on sale?" ask her

"still, only now online" I replied

"what story did you write?" ask her

"i'm definitely one of the inspirations for you?" I just smiled and answered her question, and she guessed it.

"greet you yan, can you be like this because of your husband?" ask her

"sorry, not offensive" he said

"because I thought I was spoiled the same time you are now the same as me as before?" say "you know, mas, going away you made me forget that you were the inspiration of all my sorrow now sad it turned into as you saw for yourself this is the result of my hard work all this time, it's not easy mas even I experienced bitter things again not long ago, but all has been paid in full I can still stand here."

"you also have a sports car that is quite expensive for me but I will never be able to buy it" he said

"it's a client mas, I didn't buy it a gift given to me because I could make her win in a tander she managed" I replied

"oh" answered her "your salary is great now until the maid is there a lot" I smiled hearing her I let her know what I have now.

I keep writing stories about my life that I pour in the online novels I download, pretty additional means sekeder for the needs of my firstborn who now need big money, he said, because it will enter SMA next year. Not just a hobby but also produce fun, writing for me is a place to confide in me clearly but not many people know who I really am.

"asked ko diem?" ask her to me

"sorry, privacy questions sorry I can't answer them." answer me briefly because I do not want to answer questions that later will make me reveal how much money I have.

"yan, can you?" ask her again

"maybe, just don't be weird" I replied briefly

"there's still no chance of me coming back?" I immediately looked at her staring with a very angry look.

"sorry mas, I don't know but if there's anything like it I won't take that chance. All of this is enough for me to not want to repeat" I replied firmly

"meaning you completely forgot about me yan?" ask him to make sure.

"yes, ever since I left me when I was down" I answered honestly, so that he would know what it was like to destroy me when he left me alone with all the burdens that existed. "as long as you know, I was devastated then when you left without even looking at me. I don't want to come back because since you left you have ruined me and lived my life as it is now. Because of you I fell awake really until the end I found a soul mate now, it also makes me not dare to hope for as long as it will be, the same time you I hung up my whole life turns out I you threw away like useless trash." I vented all the resentment I had long ago to my ex-husband so that he would know what he was doing to me leaving such a deep wound in my heart.

"i'm sorry, yan," said his words that sounded sorry "just now I'm here just want to fix the mistake yan"

"engga mas," I argue quickly "you're here after I succeeded, you're here after knowing I was able to successfully pay my own debt, able to live properly even without you mas"

I cried bending my knees on the chair, it hurt to remember the past. But what made me like this was because of the pain I had once stored only that I was an ordinary woman who could never hold back tears as my heart repeatedly swallowed the bitter pills of life.

"i still love you yan, and I know deep in your heart that love is still there" said the priest

"yes, it's true, I still love you" I replied in tears "even love is still the same as we first met but as long as you know the love I have for you turns out love that many times makes me broken, but, I don't understand you are now feeling good after you leave I'm near a man who makes me feel tired with life and wants to end it. Many times I fell, but I tried to get up on my own without anyone's help, so that I could be like this myself and bring the children here with me. Now you come back here to fix your mistakes? I'm not gonna fall into the same hole again even though I know you still have love for me."

"yan.." said again.

"now I have a family again, I have a new life that makes me comfortable and can walk the life as I want" I quickly cut off his words. Because I feel no need to talk about the past. "mas, please stay here, you're here for the kids and you've met the kids there I still have work to do."

Mas imam stepped away from me, after his departure I was still crying considering everything that happened to me, the love that was present in my life after his departure from me. Mas rian I remembered his, the sincere man who led me to the success I now achieved, my spoiled mas rian out of the slump caused by the mas imam, he said, until I met the kang tristan who is now my husband. So many stories that have happened to me are the only ones that keep me up and excited, my children, those who have always been my inspiration when writing, the cure when my grief arises, my tired medicine when I started to get tired of all my activities in the world.

I pour my current feelings on the chapter sheets in my novels all I run stories based on my personal experiences that I pour in the form of stories and words, he said, in writing I am free to pour my heart, without any obstacles and fear my news spread because I know everyone who reads my writing does not know who the author of this story. Because my writing is my best vent media without having to worry anymore. Type for the sake of typing chapters I finish well, I feel happy after writing there feels a breath of fresh air that makes me feel comfortable.

I have finished the work today, I began to enter the house, I saw the priest mas who lake play with the children, I just watched from within reluctantly his sense of approaching them, he said, I let the priest have time for them before his return.