BETWEEN YOU HE AND ME

there's no bright spot yet

"i'm cape ba" I told my husband

"patience mom" said my husband who always calms me "I know you can, trust me"

I just glanced at him, put myself in my long chair feeling tired the days I went through, uncomfortable feeling even to sleep I could not. Until when will this matter end, will I still accept the trials of You Lord? Immediately release my problems God for the umpteenth time I ask from You.

"already,, don't cry to be patient" I spilled my tears on my husband's shoulder as soon as I feared the trauma of coming back is my husband sincere? Or will soon leave me like I did before?. I stared fixedly at his face

"why look at Abba like that?" ask her to me

"i'm sorry, I dragged abba into my troubles" I replied I could only resign if my current husband left me when I had a "shame abba and no strength problem, sorry I could be alone"

"you mean?" ask him in surprise

"this is my problem I shouldn't have involved abba in her" I was confused as to how I said the fear enveloping my mind

"what do you mean?" her question was a little snapping. "mom, you're my wife we're a team problem ya my problem, can't dong I relax while my wife faces her own problems" I cried to hear his words I don't know what's in my brain but honestly I was scared, the comfort he gave me made me become dependent on him. I'm afraid to feel what I've been feeling with the marriage before.

"listen, we're dealing with it together" he said assuring me "don't have a mind of sorts, focus on the mother's problems. Don't add to the burden of bad thoughts"

I hugged him tightly I spilled all the burdens in my heart with tears spilled. Why do I have to go through such a hard time in my life, why is it not my fault God because I don't know anything.

"don't cry" said my husband gently "his heart is patient because God would not test his people if He knew his people were weak, so must be strong God just believe to the mother of abba want to make God's decision, abba knows the mother is strong"

"thank you always there for me" I said "I'm afraid I'll leave me like..."

"sssttt" he cut my sentence "never, never abba to leave mom. Again hear the Lord is always right to leave trials for his people, because He knows how powerful the faith of a people is for Him. Abba believes this is a test to thicken our faith to stop for negative thinking"

It feels lighter after hearing his words, maybe true what my husband said, this is a warning for me to be more careful not to easily trust the people around me, my weakness is that I sometimes can't see people around me grieving because I can get caught up in this kind of trouble.

"at the police station, what was it?" ask my husband. Because he was just waiting for me outside when I was interrogated by the police

"not much, because it was Mas ganjar who explained the details of his assumption to the officer?" answer me

"why long?" ask her

"it's complicated, ba, the problem is being monitored from the CCTV footage that is not clear may be deliberately edited by the perpetrator" said I "later tonight will be installed CCTV that is not visible to outsiders because it is only connected in the big boss office"

"oh good, keep your boss?" ask her

"strange gold that handles all of it, because he has not allowed me to be met or on someone else's phone, my phone was tapped to avoid the terror of the perpetrator" he explained again

"thankfully" my husband said, "good people will find the best way. Than,, keep smille"

"i'm just embarrassed that until this news spreads, I don't know how to deal with people's taunts, pity the kids" I'm weak when my problems involve children. What am I going to do if I'm languishing in a holding cell room for 1 week now I haven't found any evidence? How's his future? It would be a mockery of his friends for sure.

"don't get dissolved, eat yes" my husband brought me food either when he made it

"when is abba cooking? Very cool" I asked

"this is you cooking, right?" the answer is "abba is just angetin. Yu eat first"

"well, I'm not hungry yet" I said

"you have not entered anything in the morning, dear, do not until you are sick" he told me

"what if I get into a holding cell? How's kids? Surely they'll be embarrassed ba" asked me "I feel like a family ferdy sambo ba"

"that's right, you don't have to think your macems are different from their other cases" said my husband "there is a weird right? I know how odd it can help us get out of this problem, I know how odd he's been tested"

"hopefully ba" I said "because if in 1 week there is no bright spot then I fix to be a suspect ba"

"don't add any more to your mind that makes you uncomfortable" his hardship "we just trust to the investigation team they must know more than us. Just pray"

"amiinnn, hopefully they find new evidence" I said expectantly

"yes already eat first, the tree must eat abba ga want mother sick, pity the children" said his "sook open mouth abba bribe" my husband feeds me gently I am grateful he is more patient than before may we reach Jannah Mu ya Robb.

"ba, or did I resign after this?" I said "maybe this is the way so I can take care of the house well, as I want"

"are you sure?" I was silent when my husband asked me about my impromptu decision.

"that's it, but I couldn't have if it were going to happen like this again" I said

"ga will be because we will be more careful" answered my husband "but if you want to resign abba more happy, because the real woman only works for the husband at home."

I fell silent, and it was hard for me to leave what I had done with great difficulty, I can be at this point not easily need extra time and effort because it must be strong in the face of various bad talk until the end I am at the peak of my career, if I let go oh it doesn't feel heavy.

"thank you Ba" I said

"for this time even with working mothers but do not neglect the responsibility of mothers to take care of the house well and abba ga feel lack of affection, as well as children" my husband always calms me down when I'm upset.

"i'm afraid of repeating myself" I was half-desperate to reveal all my grief

"as long as we work carefully insya alloh all will be fine, all happens because of our negligence ma'am, sometimes we are too trusting with people we do not know his intent" he said. I let out a long breath of weight piled up on my shoulders making me tired with the circumstances.

"the most important thing we as humans should not despair must be sure, because strong beliefs are able to knock down the coral that stands firm, as long as his beliefs are in conjunction with the right thing" say it again to me

"don't leave me alone" I said

"ga will be dear," she smiled as she replied to my words. "you know what honey, what made me fall in love with you until now?" I could only stare at her as she asked me her questions.

"because you are the toughest woman i've ever met" my husband smiled and kissed my forehead "I know the journey of your life all along, I know, you've been through things that maybe I can't get through, I also know what's been the toughest problem in your life right now, between you and your dad, right?" I was stunned to remember to my family there until this second it has been almost 2 years I did not go home village just a friendship to mother and father, and so on, since the incident that happened to me until I divorced mas faith I never went home or called to just ask the news, I was too busy with my new world, I was too busy, even when I left, I did not come home to just look at them.

I just ordered my friend to pick up my kids at his grandparents' house, I know I was wrong but I still keep the pain too deep, until now, I have not been able to forgive myself for what has happened to me, the end of which is all messy because of him.

"dear, behind all the success you achieve there is a mother who still always prays for you, abba is sure she's there to pray for you all the time because there's not going to be a mother who's going to let her child fall and get sick for too long. You are also a mother you can feel what your mother feels for you"

I fell silent listening to all his words and could not feel my eyes turning hot and the water dripping on my cheeks. What I have to do, is this happening because of the selfish nature that exists in me. There began an inner war, which left my chest full.

"we're going back to Yu's village, too, all looking at the kids, right?" take my husband. I was silent I was confused how.

"down your ego, how will they be the parents that we must always respect, remember their sacrifice until you can be like this, without them you will never be"

I'm still not flinching, raging all the weight of the mind, I'm reminded all about the old man, I'm thinking about the old man, I was the eldest of them should it be me that they can rely on for old age but instead I was the one who always made a mind load for them.

"or as if you were on the phone, ask them for news" he told me

"no now ba, I want to go home when I'm okay" I said, "I don't want them to know what happened to me here"

"alright, now rest yes" his orders

"children where ba?"

"said mba they are still sleeping from the time we came home earlier" replied "have not been too in the mind of children while let abba control them"

"abba ga work? All day long, didn't you send me?"

"intentionally take a day off for the mother" he replied with a smile

"thank you yes"

"sama, you have slept so that you can rest enough" he said as he enveloped me

"where you going?"

"to the workspace. Go to sleep first" I lay down my body trying to close my eyes and fall asleep. My husband came out of the room to work. Even in the room I could not close my eyes even though I felt unstoppable fatigue but my eyes could not be closed. Until the end I came out of the room to cross paths with my son who was going to my room

"honey mother to be surprised" I replied

"mother temenin I play yu" she invites me to play with her baby language, very adorable. I followed her to her room

"sorry mom, the kids miss their mom and they're hard to tell" said my kids' baby sitter

"it's okay" I replied smiling

"on his word father, mother should not be disturbed first"

"anything, I'm fine mba" I replied "mba please make me wedang uwuh ya mba, the ingredients are already in the kitchen"

"well ma'am" I accompanied my son who was playing with his carefree for a moment made me forget what happened. I was so cool that I didn't realize that Kang Tristan was standing at the door smiling and getting closer to me and their children were scattering to my husband inviting us to play and follow their words, we spent time playing with the kids.

"sadly we will go to the house of the same father yes, all of us see the same mamas still there." said my husband to the children.

"does she mean?" ask me

"yes we're going to go to their grandparents" she replied

"i want to go to Abba" said my son

"yes, we will go there together" he replied to the children who whined to ask his grandfather. Their habit of calling their grandparents is mom and dad. As for me and his father's mother and to his biological father's father.

"but ba?" he just smiled and nodded I did not continue my conversation because I did not want to hear the children. I don't want them to know that her mother is in a very serious and complicated situation.