Be My Soldier Forever

Ep. 84

From: Evan

For: Jericho

Hi, uncle Jericho.

I am 11 years old now.

Now that I know and understand that it was my uncle who replied to my letters all along, I'm actually dead, you're not here anymore, dad can't be with us and because he can't get back the letters from me, he can't hit Andre in the face, she can't love mom and she can't comfort Anita because of Andre and hit her harder than you, but most importantly, she can't keep her promise and come back to me, for us, for us, our family will always be incomplete, because there are people missing among us.

And that person, is my father, my father, my own father and I can't replace him, I can't pretend to be like the other kids, I pretended to be like the others because I believed that my father would come back and give me a gift.

When I showed Anita the letter 'father', she didn't talk and a few seconds later, she just laughed and cried, then she told me that dad was dead.

First, I didn't understand what it meant to die, so he talked to me about living and dying for hours, and we made research on some quotes about the truth between life and death, he said, I feel so smart!

So, since you, Uncle Jericho, you don't know the difference between life and death, I'll explain it to you.

There is no specific philosophical definition. For life and death.

But life is when you are generally aware of what is around you, you can see, feel, touch, speak, reciprocate and think.

While death is the inability to do the above.

He further explained that some people are emotionally dead, numb, they are here, alive, with us, but we cannot feel it, we cannot determine whether they are happy, sad, sad, angry or depressed. They just sit around us, emotionless.

He also said that sometimes at certain times you will decide to commit suicide because you cannot live life without feeling.

Uncle Jericho, I don't know if I'm mad at you for hiding this truth from me, or pretending to be my father when in fact my father is gone. Or should I feel grateful that you let myself go through my childhood painlessly, I think I like the second choice.

So, thank you uncle, the best uncle, for giving me the opportunity to live like any other child, although sometimes it hurts.

Then, Anita went to help mom in the kitchen, cut some vegetables for our dinner and she whispered to me "just like mom"

I really love my mom, uncle, I don't want her to die emotionally, but I feel like I'm already too late.

Please, uncle Jericho, save my mother, don't let her die, don't let her feel sad.

Ohya Anita also helped me write this letter.

With love, with,

Evan and Anita