As Strong as the Mentari, as Soft as the Moon

Episode 43's. The Painful Reality

"Say something, Fara...Don't be like this" said bang David as he slowly shook my body. As if just realized, I immediately looked at the David bang without being adorned with a smile. "What should I do, Bang...?" lirih. Empty gazes. My tears have dried up. Lunglai. Then lean my head on the shoulder of bang David. Like I used to do when my grief and tears never ended. Every now and then David slowly rubbed the tip of my head or the back of my hand trying to calm me down. While at the end of the chair I saw Mirza's sister sitting looking at me deeply. Next to him sat Amara. His face was a little grim. His eyes also looked a little puffy. "Mama doesn't like to be in this situation. And in a situation like this, you better explain clearly, Mirza. Mama does not want all the goodness that has been in can be lost just like that" said Mama while looking at me softly. I'm sure you understand my anxiety and my heart's wounds. Hearing that, Mirza straightened her body. His eyes did not look at me. "At that time, exactly after one year I lost Fara. I'm getting more and more upset. College's fucked. My job's a mess. And that morning...."

The Mirza Flashback On

The air greeted my body. The cold got to the bone, I guess. The blow is able to shed leaves and fly them away from the tree. I look up at the sky, no sun. Only the black clouds were decorating it. This is a sign that rain will soon greet the earth. A group of birds also fly agitated towards home. As if knowing the situation that was going to happen. But it is still morning.

A few moments later, as the sign appeared finally rain began to wet the earth. I sat down on a garden chair. No matter what, the rain has washed all over the body. I was almost desperate to find the woman I loved. A woman who is everything to me. "Where are you....?!" I cried out in the rumbling sound of rain. I'm upset. "Mys....!" my cry again exposes the immortality of my soul. Put me on the red soil in the garden. My face looked. My hands are clenched. My sobs can't be contained anymore.

As if to wake up, when my face was not washed out by the rain again I opened my eyes slowly. I saw a woman poking at me. "Mara.." I said when I recognized her. "My house is close from here. Better take shelter in my house." said Amara who looked at me softly. I don't know what magic he gave me, I just accompanied his steps.

Eleven o'clock past fifty minutes. A set of clothes and a towel Amara thrust at me. "It's dad's, put it on. Use the bathroom in the guest room. Let me show you.." said Amara with a smile. I followed her little steps again.

For almost thirty minutes I flushed my body. My back isak I drowned in the gurgling water. This is the only way I can know how my Isaac exists. "Mira....!" amara's voice broke my daydream. The bathroom door was repeatedly knocked on. "We eat yes.in the waiting father at the dining table" said Amara again. "Well.." I said after reconciling the immortality in the heart.

I slowly opened the bathroom door after I finished getting fully dressed. And as Amara said, I went straight to the table. There was waiting for Amara, a strong man. He was over fifty years old, but not sixty. "Om.." I said as I nodded in reverence. "Sit down, Mirza. Amara told me everything. Stay here some time. Hopefully it can make you calmer" said Om Reza while looking at me. I don't know what Amara told me. I don't take a dizzy. I didn't think about it. "Thank you, Om.." I said as I devoured the lunch menu on my plate.

Days change. A month has passed. I have managed to hide my life from the crowd. I'm disappearing. And all my grievances are shared with Amara and her family. My search never stopped. Through Pandu and Satria, I continued to search for Fara's whereabouts. I don't know until when. I don't know myself.

Eight o'clock is ten minutes. On the even day of one month we got some alarming news. Om Reza, Amara's father had an accident. Amara runs to the hospital where her father is. I quickly followed his steps. Hysterical Amara in the IGD room when she found out her father's condition. The doctor allowed us to meet, because Reza asked for it. "I'm sorry, Amara." said om Reza stammered with one breath. "Son Mirza promised you'd take care of Amara. You're a good boy. After she leaves, Amara will be alone. No one's looking after him. Marry Amara. Om, ask.with...very.." said om Reza who makes me stunned. My mind bounced far away somewhere. "Mirza.." said om Reza. His blood-soaked hand held my hand and of course woke me up from the daydream. "Please promise.." he said again. "Yes, um.." I was worried. "Dad....!" shout Amara. He's so hysterical.

Ten o'clock past fifty minutes. At the pusara om Reza, Amara is still a salty sedan. His eyes are still puffy. I embrace her tiny body in my arms just to calm her down. I accompanied him until all the mourners left the cemetery. "Don't listen to what you've said. He doesn't understand your situation, Mirza. I can survive." he said which made me relieved.

Days change. I've been back in my life for over two months. Back to mingling in the hustle and bustle of the world. And Fara.still in my search.

Drrt...Drrt...Drrt...

My phone shimmered. "Mara.." I said opening the conversation. "Za, help me.." uvapnya with a vibrating voice. And there was a little Isaac in his voice. "What's up, Amara..?" I was a little bit upset. And Amara was silent, no answer. "Where are you?" my many. Amara then mentions an address. Immediately I stater silver sports car and drove at high speed down the road based on the address mentioned Amara. I asked him not to disconnect the phone, so that I would know the situation.

Sobbing Amara sat next to me. "I'm sorry, Za." he said bitterly. I'm speechless. "I guess I can live independently with potluck money. Apparently not.." said Amara pilu. From his language I can understand what the situation is right now. "Marry me, Za...I can't live alone. Didn't you say it in front of dad." he said which made me stunned. "I beg you, Za.." he said again with tears in his eyes.

"Who's your wall?" I said then what he greeted with a headband. "My father is an only child, and the bloodline of grandfather is also absent, because grandfather is also an only child" Amara said in a trembling voice. "The people around your house know?" I said again that he replied with a nod.

I drove my silver sports car to Amara's house. To an ustadz we recounted our current situation. And he understands the situation. And it just so happened that he was a childhood friend of Amara's father, so he knew very well the situation and condition of Amara's family. And he was ready to help us marry. Preparation was done for approximately two hours. "I'm sorry, Fara." I said repeatedly. Then to Amara I explained my situation to me at the time. That my love is only for Fara. Nothing else and nothing. And Amara was willing to accept all that.

Four o'clock, fifteen minutes. In a mosque. Without my family's support and support. I expressed readiness as a husband and gave protection to Amara. It shook my soul a little as two witnesses declared right on my contract. It's about my guilt for Fara. My love that still disappears is swallowed up by the earth. "I'm sorry, Fara..." I said it in my heart repeatedly. I don't know if you'll accept this or not later. I don't know.

At the same time, same day, but different month. In a mini market. I bought daily necessities for Amara. I entered the mini market without any feelings. Or any preconceived. But when I was inside, my heart was beating. And there was a strange sigh in my soul as if calling out to me. My eyes are around the room. I don't know what I'm looking for. But my heart said to immediately go around the mini market, especially somewhere near the accessories. The more my soul shakes when I see a woman standing near the accessories. "Fara.." I said softly. My steps are getting closer to her. I caught it from his gesture, it seemed like he was avoiding something as well. "Ah, shit.." I said when I lost her figure. I'm sure I saw Fara here. I called Pandu and Satria. Ask all the possibilities. I'm speechless. Most likely what I saw was Fara. Because according to Pandu and Satria both had indeed almost found Fara, but lost track when the car that carried Fara disappeared. "Mara...Where are you at?" lirih.

After some needs I got I went straight to the car. On the way to the parking lot which is only a few meters away at a glance I look back at the figure that I have longed for, namely Fara. But only a pity only at a glance, because after that back he disappeared like swallowed by the earth. "Fara.." I muttered as I left the parking lot and briefly floated a look back at the mini market.

The Mirza Flashback Off

We listened to every word Mirza. Yep...Robb, what am I supposed to do? I guess it's just me, it turns out there's another woman in Mirza's life. Whatever and whatever the reason I certainly have not been able to accept it. "I'm sorry, Fara. I am afraid of a life of kara. I don't know what to do." said Amara. "You guys are so naive. Yeah, you two. Brother Mirza and sister Amara. Don't you know how my life used to be? We are the same, Amara. The difference is that you give up, I don't.." I said with a smile and a sharp look.My body seemed to get an injection of energy out of nowhere so I could stand up straight. "Fara, excuse me sister" said sister Mirza with a trembling voice and trying to grab my hand. I brushed it off slowly, but just gave a signal that I was not okay. "You alone inhabit my heart, Fara. I beg you to believe me." he said again while trying to embrace my body. "That's enough...!" loud say. "Sorry, for now, Fara has not been able to accept any reason from sister Mirza. So temporarily leave Fara alone" I said just before passing. "Fara..wait" said brother Mirza and bang David almost simultaneously. The two chased my steps to the courtyard. "This is not what I expected." he said as he continued to try to line my steps.

"Fara, stop...!" scream out, Mirza. I immediately stopped my steps. "This is not what I expected. Listen to me.." he said again while clutching my body. Her field chest touched my tiny back and momentarily flew my daydream. Then I sobbed. My body shakes holding the sobs. "Then what did you expect?" ask me with a vibrating voice. "You...You're all I expected. I'll divorce her soon" Mirza said. "You can't divorce me, Mirza. I'm pregnant with your child." said brother Amara when he arrived near us.

Deg.

I'm stunned. When I heard the thunder in the middle of the day, I was silent. There are no more words I can say. My eyes are getting hotter and my tears are ready for freefall. I revolted for a moment when I realized. My body refused his touch. My soul cried out against Amara's words. I ran towards the gate. I no longer ignore all the pomp from either bang David or mama though. "Fara, wait...!" said bang David trying to line my fingers. Likewise with the mother who tearfully tried to prevent my departure. At a glance behind the door I saw a figure who had since noticed the situation that occurred. His eyes are not out of me. His hands clenched violently. He is Roy's older brother, Mirza's older brother, who is a different mother or whom I used to know as Mr. Darius.

"You've been unfair, Mirza." said the late Roy I can still hear. A taxi suddenly I managed to find immediately. I ask the driver to quickly drive away from the magnificent and beautiful house. My head is on the back of the chair. My eyes stared through the wet window glass as it had just been in the rain. "Where are you going, ma'am." asked the driver who managed to break my daydream. But I was surprised when I heard the taxi driver. I also looked at his face from the mirror. "The Guide....?!' I said half scream.

The To Be Continued...