The System In My Head

Game dong

Ben stared at the flashing red neon lights on it that read "Domina." It was the name of the bar that Antonio had brought him. There was a line of people in front waiting to enter, further clogging the noisy nightlife path.

"Are you sure this place is good?" ask Ben.

"Yup, this place is famous for chicks" replied Antonio.

"So you've pulled chicks from here before?"

"...Ohooooo yes!"

"...I don't trust you."

"...Not me, but my friend! Whoahoooo boy, he tore it up!" Antonio shook his grinning head up and down.

"...Did he do it?"

"...I meani...I wasn't there.but this big brother in the forum raved about it! This guy posts about a different threesome every day, so he knows his shit! ...Doesn't it? "

"...Is she?"

...

Antonio let go of his smile. "OK, look... You know I was 21 not long ago, so I don't really know about Manhattan bars. Let's see how it goes..."

Ben feels bad about taking the nightlife advice from "Bro on the forum", but he doesn't seem to have a better source. "alright... Do you have to wear that shirt?"

Antonio wore a brown t-shirt that read, "My Pen is Big."

Antonio grinned as if he knew a secret, "You misread it... It's a play bro... 'Pen Is' should be read as peni—"

"I know! I asked why are you wearing it?"

Antonio looked at him like an idiot. "Chickens digging big dongs bro. I need to explain this to you?"

Ben's jaw is down. His cousin gets more stupid with age. He cursed in his mind. 'Whether they like it or not doesn't matter! The problem is the shirt!'

Then Antonio patted his head and showed an apologetic smile. He scolds himself for not having more patience with Ben. He remembered that Ben was only 18 years old. When Antonio was that age, he also did not know many basic rules of dong...

Antonio apologized to Ben, and reminded himself, 'Patience to him. Game dong running in...It's layered like an onion...Ben will learn in due course.'

...

Ben glanced to the side. 'Why is he holding his hand in front of him like that? Is that Obi Wan Kenobi's impression?'

Antonio gave her a reassuring nod. "Don't worry because it has levels. Believe in the process."

Antonio shook his head with a wide grin. "By the time they found out, it was too late for Ben. It's too late!"

...

'For some of us, it's too late...' Ben regretted asking.

Antonio changed the subject. "Bro, let's work the line."

"What do you mean?"

"We don't have to be inside to pick up chicks. We can smear our biscuits first outside a little bit. That way, when we go inside, we won't start with an empty plate. We already have some chicks to talk to.

Sounds like a good idea to Ben, so he's following in Antonio's footsteps.

Antonio paced past the line throwing away his favorite nightlife opener. "What's wrong ladies? You guys trying to make Patrick Shwasted tonight?"

The girls glanced at his shirt and showed expression in a narrow range between dislike and disgust. Their verbal responses are not ideal.

After several rounds of similar results, Antonio deemed the verbal opener unsuccessful. He tried a confident, non-verbal approach. He walked up to some girls with his thumbs, pointing at them with a swinging motion at his clothes as he nodded and made hard eye contact.

A few minutes later, the two of them waited in the lane. Ben patted Antonio on the back, comforting him. "I'm sure the lighting out here is the problem. Let's try again inside where there's better lighting."

"...Yeah, you're right. I'm sure that's all." Antonio lifted his head again.

Ben thought, 'The lighting should be better inside.maybe dark enough that no one can see the shirt...'

After a while, they reached the front line. It's time for an ID check.

Ben took out the Fake ID of Club Rat, looking last time at the grimacing old troll on the front. According to the system, this will get him in. He didn't see how, but it cost 500 points. If it doesn't work, he'll sell it on eBay to try to cover his losses from Danny DeVito fans. With a nervous smile, Ben handed the ID to the guard.

As the guard looks between Ben and ID, Ben bends his knee and inflates his cheek to make it look more like a photo, but it's all for naught...

It worked! The guard did not glance at the ID a second time, letting Ben go straight in.

'This is truly a magical alchemy item!' Ben said to himself as the gate of truth tore off some of his pride.

Ben follows Antonio up the gray stone steps to the bar. With each step approaching, the blasting music grew louder. As they stepped through the large wooden door to the dark dance floor, the thump of music became overwhelming. Men and women filled the room, laughing and shaking their bodies.

Antonio leaned over to Ben to whisper something in his ear, but Ben could not hear a word. The music is loud, but that's not why. Something else ringed in his ear, capturing all the attention of his senses. That's a system alert!

[Example dungeon detected]

[Special event begins]