Colorless Aurora

departures

1 Year later,

To all my friends,

I don't know what I want to say, I myself am not good at conveying feelings through writing, but this may have been the twentyth paper I had torn just to convey my departure, without telling anything, only I could not see the sad faces of all the crying companions if I said about my current decision, she said,

I myself realized why I was so selfish when I decided everything, you can upset Sina, I know maybe you'll say I'm stupid and hit the classroom table, but don't overdo it because I'm afraid the table is hurt by your anger, I'm not who I used to be, I don't even understand myself, but after seeing every spirit of life and the struggle of my best friends I realized, I do not deserve to complain with all the advantages that I have, he said,

Noe, yes you are my best friend, from childhood until now I never thought you were stupid, just a little hope that you try more not to consider yourself stupid, just a little, on the other side of yourself, I can't possibly forget all of our togetherness even until yesterday you were a hero to me,

Sina, you're the one closest to me, you're the one who showed the beauty of the world behind all the suffering I've endured in my life, you're the one who's the most angry about my selfishness right now, but I cannot forget you, you are my savior,

Rina, I feel like I just knew you yesterday, cheered up the fight and all your hopes, I know that behind your pessimism and drive you are the one who fought the hardest of all this, because of you I know how useless I am in front of you,

And all the friends in my class that I can't possibly tell you everything about, I don't understand how to be friends properly but knowing you guys I know what friendship means,

Everything I've experienced in my life I feel lucky and if I give you a gift then only all these photos are my treasures,

I cannot ask for much because I myself have not given anything of value except memories and I live to keep that precious thing up to now,

Hopefully when I return to this city, I can still feel the warmth of all my friends,

For everything, may this happiness be eternal,

Assalamualaikum, your friend, your,

Yoan Alfarizi, "

For some reason I can't say this in person, right before the graduation ceremony I came to school much earlier than usual, at 6 am, yes to the schoolgirls it was common, but I knew this was my reason for not being seen by my classmate, I took a letter and all the memorable photos on my desk, it's a bit sad, but I'd feel hard if I had to meet everyone before I left, just a few minutes in class, go around and go out, the figure of the man with his stupid face was already standing outside the classroom, looking at me seriously and saying,

"So are you sure of your decision, " said Noe who stood up as if to challenge me,

I can't lie to my best friend, and even behind my smile she must realize how hard it is for me to leave all this behind,

"Yes, sure and this is what I have to do ." Answer me with a serious look

"You are a fool An ." Reply with a serious look, too,

"I'm a fool, "I admit it,

"So may I hit you just once ." Noe said he had clenched his hand,

Without waiting for my answer, he slammed his punch right on my left cheek,

"I haven't said it yet, but you're still doing it ." Shouted I was enduring the pain of Noe's punch,

"Yes, because I'm stupid too ." Noe answered with a smile,

I walked past him, paused for a moment to turn my back and said,

"See you guys, I'll always miss you ." Waving my hand without seeing Noe's face,

"Yes, I'll see you soon after you graduate ." She replied that she was smiling to hide her cries,

I continued my steps, left him without seeing him again, for the hardest thing was to let go and not be sure of ourselves, but I accepted all of this,

But not until I came out to leave the school and get into the car that would certainly take me home and go straight to the airport, a bunch of stupid people were facing me in front of the school gate, one of them was screaming, one of them was screaming,

"I'm sorry, I'm not meddling in your affairs An, but ...." It was Rina's voice and continued after she took a deep breath,

"You're a fool, even after saving my life, I haven't had time to repay all your kindness An ." The scream was louder, though,

One class was standing like giving a farewell ceremony to myself, I aimed my camera at all of my classmates, after photographing it I said, I said,

"No need to be sad, I'm sure we'll find happiness for ourselves and the moment we get it, I'll be right here, right in front of you all and say

"THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME AND GIVING ME HAPPINESS HERE ."

I screamed with all the tears in my heart,

I didn't want to be seen by them, if an An cried and it was so embarrassing, even from the back of a thick book clap a single teacher's mother made me realize as she said,

"You'll still be stupid An and come back anytime, because I'm ready to throw all the books I bought at you ." The teacher said with a smile,

I was still crying, unceasingly, as I should have known that happiness was close, as close as the eye could see, as close as the heart beat and as close as this feeling I had long ago, when I left I muttered,

"Yes, my friend I am happy, even I am happy to be able to live my life together with all this ." My murmurs left behind every beautiful memory brought by the sorrowful smiles of all my friends,

At the airport, when the voice announcing the departure of my plane was ringing like a school bell with the song of a young girl, the figure of a woman walking with her cane approached me, yes she was Rea, I approached her, clasped his hand and said,

"Why did you come here, wasn't today the day of your operation, "Said I looked at it with a confused feeling, saying,

"I don't care, why don't you say anything if you leave today, " said Rea, who clasped my hand even tighter,

"I don't want you to worry, "I said with a look on his face full of sadness,

"But, I'd rather not if I could only regret not delivering you ." Answer Rea,

Yes, back there Nagisa, Tita and Rin stood looking at me with a smile, yes all the events of today are probably plans from them,

"I was defeated by my own brother, "I murmured in my heart,

When I didn't know what to say to Rea myself, Rea removed the circular bracelet in her left hand, putting it in my left,

"I didn't give you this bracelet, but I lent it to you, so I hope you can give it back to me ."

"Yes, 4 years, then wait for me ." Promise to Rea with the grasp of my strong hand,

"I'll definitely be waiting for you ." Rea smiled at me, replied,

The last call for departure to paris was echoed, I couldn't spend any longer on Rea, but the promise for him was the certainty of where I would return for him,

I won't close my eyes, though,

Or take my eyes off the future,

Even though it was a day where the dark of the night frightened me,

I'm sure this happiness will take me away from it all,

And I believe it's not always dark in my life,

Then I don't want to close these eyes.