Colorless Aurora

the beginning of everything

I could smell the hospital's distinctive scent, the smell of various drugs, the sweat of the patients and the tension of everyone who stayed in the waiting room, I could still smell all that from the serenity of the seating on the bench outside the VIP room inpatient room, I was still busy with my own world, she said, sinking into the various writings and knowledge that I hold and read to exhaust my boredom, that's when I saw her, the figure of a little girl about 11 years old was the same as me of course, twin tail hairstyle, like confused, looking to the right and to the left, I don't know what happened to him I looked a little and made me curious, but my curiosity was denied as she sat down beside me and said,

"What are you reading, "He asked with a face full of curiosity, and,

"Why are you just sitting here" he asked back,

"Didn't you come in to see your mama "A question that made me a little dizzy, you know,

"Hey why are you quiet, look at that bug in there ." It sucks I hear all those questions don't stop,

A noise that entered my ear, disturbing the comfort that had become a natural thing if I had gone silent and read every word of the book I was holding in this place, his hand pulled the book I was reading and said,

"Hey why are you quiet, look there's something interesting here ." He's still asking questions and I don't expect a reward if I can answer them,

"Don't bother me ." Reply I'm a little upset, please,

I pulled back the book he took from my hand, but back he pulled it, he pulled it,

"Hey, look at this there's a worm ." With hands full of mud it was faced right in front of my face,

"Don't bother me ." This woman really pisses me off

After she left, at least for a few minutes I felt calmer, but it was only a few minutes and a moment when I did not hear her noise, I became curious as to what she was doing there, he was sitting limp next to the garden, stirring up the muddy wet ground, as sad as I ignored him, I approached and said, ''I thought,

"What are you doing ."I asked without taking my eyes off the book and he replied,

"I wonder if the worm can be eaten." He said very plainly,

To imagine it I couldn't, but he kept playing the lump of earth that contained the worm with his wooden twig,

"If you think about what it is to eat, then the answer can be, but in this kind of life it is an unusual act, there are several worms that can be eaten for example wawo worms with the Latin name Lysidice oele and some can be made into medicine, namely earthworms, earthworms, according to research coelom liquid in this worm that is in the womb has 40 good proteins as ... ", I stopped when he saw it sharp in my direction, looking at his eyes, I couldn't concentrate anymore,

"Why do you like to read, whatever you read, I hate to learn myself, "Said he saw me strange, I mean,

"Reading for me is fun, because in it I can know what I don't know, all the books that can teach ....." I said in a slightly arrogant tone,

Even once again before I finished what I wanted to say, she had already disappeared from before me and saw her running towards the nun who was carrying fruits, shouting, screaming,

"Apel, sister I asked for the apple, ." Shouted the girl without excuse,

Following the sister from behind and pulling her clothes, as I approached I was given an apple as well,

"What do you think, "My murmur felt like I was being pulled into another world by her,

"I love apples ." Glad he didn't listen to what I said,

Even for himself the apple he held was important to him, whereas the trouble he gave for having made my reading time wasted was utterly meaningless, looking at him slowly eating every part of the apple was like he cared nothing, even after he had eaten it without remaining at all and came back to look at me attentively, but his concern it's not about me or the book I read, he's more interested in,

"Are you going to eat your apples ." Asked him with his pleading face,

How much he likes an apple, even one is lacking to fill his stomach,

Of course he had already finished it before I even saw him back, from a distance a patient bed was like moving towards us, he was jumping off this sitting bench, he said, it would get her hit by the patient's bed, thinking less than two seconds before the time that would get her hit, I regardless of what would happen, directly jumped down and pushed her down,

"What are you doing ." He turned around and said it was his angry attitude,

Even though he said so, I myself still thought, that I would be late jumping to avoid it, but whether it was a fortune, or not, because the swipe style and the bed type were wheeled which made it turn a few degrees so that it passed right behind from where I was standing and made me breathe a little relieved if I imagined what would happen if only I really got hit by that bed,

"You're evil, pushing and making me dirty like this ." He said furiously,

He was still noisy even after everyone had shouted and came to see us both,

"Geez ." I muttered to see this little girl angry at me,

But a few minutes of letting go of my attention to him, he was already lying on the floor with a face in pain and a hand holding right in his heart, certainly in his real heart, he said,

"Hey you why ." Surely I was frantically and confusedly shaking his body,

"Mama, mama." He said with pain,

I ran after putting him in the chair I was sitting in and ran in to call a woman who had a serious conversation with my mother,

"She, anu ...your child ...." I said in panic,

Although there was no need to explain in detail the meaning of my actions to interfere with my mother's conversation with her friend and the aunt ran out in a hurry, taking her to the treatment room near the side of this room,

That little bit of memory makes you feel like something I didn't think would be a special memory for me, I just enjoyed a relaxing time in my room and saw all that was so different from the rooms in my house, even with some fancy and modern decor, all of this is natural because in the place where I now live is the main house of my family, even though for myself, never came to this place even once, he said,

When I tried to get out of the room at 10 p.m, I just realized that in every corner of the house is decorated by various types of photos and I realized that everything is the same as the photos in the room gallery from my mother, even when I saw the picture in the living room, it was a photograph of a moon rainbow, a natural phenomenon of refraction of moonlight on the edge of the sea, it was beautiful every time I saw it, he said, involuntarily the hoarse voice of a man called out from the guest room,

"An, you haven't slept yet ." My father said with his big voice,

Looking at my father who was still sitting on one of the benches with all the stacks of album books that there might be more than ten stacks on the table, he said,

"Not yet, "Answer me a little awkwardly,

I approached and sat on the bench of the guest room, feeling an atmosphere so thick with awkwardness, a stifling feeling filled the room and I didn't know what to say, until a few minutes passed, my father started a conversation that I had never thought of in my entire life,

"So have you been happy with all this ." Ask my dad with his creepy face,

That question does not refer to what is before me now, for the answer is

"Not yet, I still haven't found anything that makes me happy, but I'll create my own happiness, "In my slightly stiff tone, in my voice,

The face after hearing what I said did not show his feelings, but I realized it was like looking at me with a look of confidence,

"It is good that you understand, for happiness is not to be waited for, but we ourselves must create it, "Said with a terrible smile,

And one more thing I have to create, a happiness for someone I love, without any regrets, I want to create it for her, for my happiness anyway,