
"DAFFIN!!!"
My body jerked with my hands outstretched forward as if I was about to grab something.
Wandering views. Blank. There's no one in this room but me. It was still the same as when I entered it.
My breath was breathless like someone who had just run. Sweat ran down my temple until it flowed past my eyes.
I wiped my sweat with the back of my hand and realized one thing. "I'm just dreaming."
My lips quivered withstanding the cries, but all my might was trying to draw a smile so that my heart would feel better.
I rushed out of the walk in closet and immediately looked for my phone that I left on the nightstand.
My fingers trembled while searching for Daffin's name on my phone. I felt a little better when I saw a picture of Daffin filling my phone screen until I unconsciously smiled.
I can't wait to call Daffin, but my call isn't connected.
"Where is he?" I murmured anxiously, then tried to make a call back. "Daffin, where are you?" my lament.
Until a few calls, still can not connect. I had to make a decision to contact Shaka. However, it is no different from Daffin. Shaka can't be contacted either. It made me feel more anxious.
"Rania!!!" I shouted, almost crying. "Rania, come!"
It didn't take long, Rania was already knocking on the door. "Mistress?"
"Come in, Rania!" quickly answer.
As soon as I saw Rania, I immediately hugged her. My body trembled violently due to my crying that exploded instantly.
"Mrs ...," Rania rubbed my back gently.
"Rania ... I-I just had a bad dream ...," I said stammered as the crying grew.
Rania let go of my arms and led me to sit on the edge of the bed, she then gave me a glass of water. "Drink, ma'am, so that you may be calmer."
I glanced at Rania's face, she was younger than me, but her demeanor was very calm and also thoughtful. It's so much different from me.
"Thank you, Rania." I took the glass in Rania's hand and directly moved the water in the glass into my stomach.
Rania smiled and took back the glass in my hand. "You're calmer, madam?"
I nodded, but it was still hard to smile. My hand grabbed Rania's hand and looked at her expectantly. "Can you help me? Please contact Shaka or Daffin, or anyone who might be with them right now!"
Rania's eyeballs are perfectly rounded. "But, Madam -"
"Please, Rania! I had a bad dream and now somehow my heart feels like something bad is happening to Daffin. I've been trying to reach her, but I can't." Tears flowed back into my eyes.
"Alright, Madam," replied Rania hesitantly, her hand gently rubbing my hand.
With my heart racing, I noticed the look on Rania's face that was starting to look the same as mine.
Rania shook her head. "Mr Shaka did not answer, Madam,"
My mood is getting worse. I was ready to cry again, but Rania immediately sat down beside me and rubbed my back gently.
"Calm down, ma'am, maybe Mr and Mr. Shaka are having an important meeting" Rania said.
Also true! But is it so important that it can't be contacted? Cool out! I need to be calm to think clearly.
I looked at Rania who was smiling knot. "Hopefully it is, Rania."
***
By midnight, Daffin had not returned. I was getting anxious and could no longer control my heart.
"I have to see mom" I muttered as I stepped out of the room.
The black dress I was wearing started to look shabby as I just kept moving around here and there to relieve my anxiety even though Rania had already persuaded me to rest.
"Mrs, where are you going?" rania asked, she had just reached the top rung of the stairs.
"I want to see mom, Rania, where are you from?" I saw something strange about Rania's behavior.
Rania's gaze was avoiding me. He kept looking the other way as he replied, "big lady is asleep, ma'am, you better go back to the room. I just got back from the kitchen."
Rania lied! I'm sure because he didn't dare look me in the eye. Without ambushing or asking, I passed through Rania and descended the stairs carefully.
As soon as I reached the last rung, I saw father and mother talking in the dining room.
My steps had not yet reached where my father and mother were, but I suddenly saw daddy David entering the room in a hurry.
"The body has been found! Now we can go to the hospital." exclaimed daddy David, who made father and mother stand up. Their faces were covered with worry.
"Who's life, Daddy?" I asked, as soon as I approached them.
The highlight of their eyes immediately pointed at me who was replying with a puzzled look.
"Lily ...," The parents looked so shocked by my presence.
My forehead winches. "Daddy? I asked, whose body was found?"
The instant silence created made me remember the nightmare I had before. Nah! It was just a dream. All of these are definitely not related to each other. God, I want to believe that what's on my mind isn't right, but my knees feel so limp.
"Corpse" Daddy David did not answer because I had fallen to the floor. "Lilly!!!" his yell.
Mom and Dad came up to me to help me stand up. They led me to sit in a chair and try to calm me down. Believe that! I am not calm, but I feel more anxious because the parents just look at each other without saying a word.
"Please! Explain to me what's going on? Where's Daffin? Why hasn't he come back yet? I haven't been able to reach him since," I asked in a row because I was so impatient.
She breathed her breath before answering me. "Dear, actually"
"Maya, Lily better not tell you!" sergeant daddy David, make mom undo his intentions.
"Tell me! What's the matter exactly?" I was a little pushy.
I felt my mother's warm hand clasping my hand. "But you have to promise to be strong to hear it."
Doubtful. I hesitated, but I kept nodding so they would tell me the truth.
"Daffin and Shaka had an accident because some people were chasing them, but" explained daddy David hanging.
I want to be strong. Really am! But it felt like my whole body was not boned until my hand fell down.
"Lilly? You okay, honey?" ask me to worry.
As much as possible I tried to stay strong even though my heart was so broken. I did not expect to be a widow twice and to be pregnant like this. What's wrong with these guys? Why did they leave me when I needed them the most?
***
The sound of the knocking of the shoes was earthy in the middle of the hospital hallway. Such a hasty move creates a boisterous sound that hurts the ears.
Mother's warm hand continued to hold my hand gently even though I didn't say anything since our departure from home.
I decided to save my energy by remaining silent. I didn't want to fall unconscious before I saw for myself that Daffin had completely abandoned me like Erlan did.
On the way, both father, mother, and daddy David, all silenced without intending to explain anything to me. And it was so much better than I had to hear something so painful to me. The harsh reality I had to experience for the second time in my life.
"Mom, why are we going through the back door?" I asked finally, realizing it shouldn't be through this path.
"There are a lot of reporters in front of the hospital because the news of the accident that Daffin experienced was so horrendous in this country." Daddy David explained without stopping his steps.
Sure was! Daffin is the CEO of a company as big as DS Corp. She is also the ex-husband of famous model classmate Reena. There must be a lot of people who want to know their lives. The accident occurred in the city center.
We went back to silence until we passed the morgue and saw that Rei had just come out of there.
Oh my God, please no more! I feel like I've experienced this. I remember when I was about to enter the mortuary to see Brother Erlan, om Rama also came out of the room with the exact same face as om Rei's current face.
"Lilly?" Om Rei was very surprised to see me coming.
My lips are locked tight. It wasn't me who wanted to, but he locked himself in.
"Rei, how?" ask me, because I'm just quiet.
"We just need to make sure! I just hope the culprit gets caught soon so Daffin can calm down." Om Rei commented on the bland smile on his face.
My heart is broken so I can't get it back together. My first love failed before I even expressed it.
"You're right! Where's the body now?" ask dad again.
Om Rei's hand pointed towards the mortuary. "Inside, I just saw it."
Without waiting for orders from anyone, I went straight inside. I forgot the fear I had when Brother Erlan left me.
This cold room will not be able to stop a wife from seeing her husband for the last time.
At every step of the way, I hear the silly words I used to say when I didn't love Daffin.
'I don't mind being a widow twice.'
It felt like I wanted to turn back the clock and go back in time to cut off my own tongue given how confident I was when I said that.
My steps stopped when I got in front of the stiff body shown by the officer. There were two bodies lying there. My body felt weak. My feet cannot support my two-bodied body.
"Daffin ...," I said as I fell to the floor, then looked at the other corpse. "Grand ...."
I want to cry, but I don't know why my tears won't come out like they're dry. I just stared at the floor under my eyes.
"Lily ...," Mother's soft voice roused me from the empty daydream.
As much as I could, I tried to stand by holding on to the side of the corpse bed and with my lips still locked tightly.
My gaze rested on the corpse covered in white cloth. I'm sure it's Daffin's body because his posture is bigger than the other body.
Quiescent. Silent. There was no sound other than the wind. And finally my tears broke when I remembered this morning when Daffin was acting so sweet to me.
"What do you want, Plankton!!! You said you wanted me to be an innocent, stupid woman when you asked me to come back. This is what you mean! You want me to go back to being a widow while I'm pregnant!!!" Tears have caught each other on my cheeks. "Why don't you come home and lie here? Is it because I don't cook for you? Huh! Alright, wakeup! I'll cook for you, but please open your eyes!!!" my door in the middle of sobs.
"Lily, calm yourself! Listen to me first!" pinta father, his hand is already embracing my shoulder.
I looked up and saw my mother sobbing next to my father. Mother's cry was as bitter as mine so I had more and more difficulty stopping my crying.
"No, Dad! Daffin's gonna have to listen to me!" hardikku while pointing my finger towards the body that is lying stiff there.
"But, Lily"
I cut off father's words. "Enough, Dad! I want to talk to Daffin. He made me go back to experiencing this. I want him to listen to what I want to say." My gaze again looked at the corpse before me, without intending to open the white cloth that covered his face. "Wake, Daffin! Don't you wanna hear what I'm gonna say? Lookatme! I've dressed up for you. I'm wearing hi dress ...."
Why am I wearing a black dress? Could this really be a sign?
Tears flowed so hard that they blurred my eyes. "Daffin stupid!!! The plankton!!! Wake up!!! Wake up!!! You have to live because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!"
My body again collapsed to the floor with a heart that was completely intact. I didn't want to stand until I heard someone enter the room and approach me.
"I will make a calculation with this corpse because it has made me jealous!"
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