
“I've heard everything from Kesha, how you humiliated her.”
I was silent, I had no intention of reopening my mouth. Ken exhaled and slowly reduced his tight grip. I looked back at Ken who was now calmer than before. He can even drink hot chocolate from my cup. I turned my gaze to my hand he was holding when his eyes looked at me as if saying ‘all will be well’.
“Why did you refuse to play the piano for him? And also why did you say you didn't know her when she said that you were her cousin in front of so many people?”
“What's the deal with you?” reply Ken furious.
“She's the woman I love and I don't want her to keep remembering those embarrassing things.”
Without me noticing a little laugh on my face. Ken and Alvin immediately turned their eyes away upon hearing my slow laughing voice. I looked at the blue eyes that had moved away from me, the blue eyes that were once full of secrets, and the blue eyes that were now looking at me curiously. Long enough I looked into Alvin's eyes to make Ken again tighten his grip and make me re-conscious.
I wasn't looking at her because I wanted to go back to the world I've been to. I looked at him because I wanted to know the truth of his words. ‘Women I love’, anyone will know how awkward the tone is coming out to say those words. I wonder how far the lies he would tell just to satisfy his curiosity.
I exhaled and took the cup in Ken's hand.
“You drank from the same cup? Do all couples do that? Sharing a cup or spoon isn't it pretty disgusting?”
“What is the definition of ‘the woman I love’ for you? Doesn't that mean you're ready to share anything with her?”
Ken's question made Alvin speechless. The atmosphere turned awkward with just the question Ken gave. I was hoping this awkward atmosphere could make me and Ken leave the cafe.
“Maybe I haven't loved her like you love your wife,” Alvin said slowly.
Both Ken and I were silent at his words. He had said the same sentence as this time. The words that awaken me to the feelings I have.
I don't know if his lost memories will lead me back to the past or his words in the present that will make him recall our past. Between those two things, there's nothing I want. I don't want to go back to feeling what I used to feel and I don't want him to go back to doing what he shouldn't.
Alvin fell silent again, making the atmosphere even more awkward. Ken went back to sipping the rest of the hot chocolate and I looked back at my hand which was in Ken's hand. Ken's hand that was pale, now it's back red. I think he's really calm now. I turned Ken's hand, making him for a moment to look away at what I was doing.
I don't know if she's back in the wedding ring. I even forgot where to keep my wedding ring. Ken and I only used the wedding ring the day we got married, after which I asked her to never wear it again. I didn't know what I was thinking back then until I made such an unreasonable request. And now she's wearing it back, since when did she get back to wearing a wedding ring?
Should I look for my wedding ring and wear it?
Should I buy a new wedding ring?
“Should I buy a new engagement ring?”
I feel like Alvin just read my mind. Observing the movement of his hand, he took out a ring from his jacket pocket and placed it on the table. He opened the ring box and thrust it towards us. Ken took off his hand as soon as he saw the ring and I could only see Ken's face turning into a wistful one before finally looking back at the ring.
A ring made of palladium engraved with Edelwies Flowers along the ring and a small circular diamond of one-third the size of the ring. The ring I know so well. The ring I almost wore for the rest of my life. I don't know if the ring has returned to its owner. Once again, without me realizing a bitter smile again adorned my face. A smile that might make the ring owner want to fulfill his curiosity.
“You fraudster!!!” the screams of someone distracted the three of us.
Kesha and Irene had already walked towards where Alvin was sitting. They both brought so much food. Looking at Irene's pale face, they must have gone shopping and it seemed like Alvin left them just like that. Hearing Kesha's cry, Alvin immediately put the ring we had seen in his jacket pocket. It seemed, Alvin had yet to show the ring to Kesha seeing how much he wanted to hide it from Kesha.
Ken again put on his usual facial expression but I knew his current face was an expressionless face, a face as he wanted to run from trouble. Now I really don't know what's on his mind. I can't read her expressionless face. In his mind now not only did one or two questions appear, hundreds maybe even thousands of questions already filled his head.
“We wait for you 2 hours and it turns out you are here,” said Kesha followed by a pull on Alvin's ear.
Kesha immediately took a seat next to Alvin and Irene took an extra seat. Kesha sipped a drink from Alvin's cup and immediately made Alvin pull the cup. Maybe he really thought sharing the same cup was a disgusting thing.
“We're getting married. Until when will you not share with me?”
Alvin remained silent and made the atmosphere awkward. Irene elbowed Ken's arm, Ken just stared intently at him and made him look at me full of question marks. I just shook my head. Right now Ken really is someone I can't read. She's in a silent mode that I hate. I thrust the cafe customer's card at Irene, hoping she'd order something and break this awkwardness.
“What do you want to order?” Irene asked Kesha.
“Same with you.”
The atmosphere returned silent and awkward as Irene. Kesha scratched her non-itchy nose. Ken and Alvin just kept quiet while observing the surroundings. Whereas I prefer to clean up my belongings and Ken's scattered on the table.
“Why didn't you say?” kesha's question broke the silence, making me observe her immediately.
I watched his serious face. It seemed like he thought back before deciding to give me that question. I don't know the meaning of the question but seeing from the serious look on his face, he will discuss something that makes the atmosphere even more awkward than this.
“At that time, you just had an accident and are in the recovery stage. You played the piano back then because you wanted to remember memories you forgot. And the reason you say that I'm not your cousin and I look disgusting in front of my friends is because you think of me as someone else. You were hallucinating at the time. Why don't you tell me the truth?”
At the time, I didn't even know who I was. The day I woke up from my bed for 3 months was the day I knew that my whole world was destroyed and I played the piano like a possessed man. I continued to play piano keys even though I couldn't hear and see what kind of game I was playing. I even kept hallucinating seeing people I didn't want to see. I was like a madman back then and maybe I deserved to go to a mental hospital if my family reported my true condition to the doctor who handled me back then.
“Should we discuss it at this time?” ken asked with a sharp look of his making Kesha immediately close her mouth.
“Can you not be rude to him?” tanya Alvin finally made a sound after remaining silent for 10 minutes since Kesha and Irene entered the cafe.
I exhaled slowly and grabbed Ken's ice-cold hand back. He brushed off my hand which made Kesha and Alvin stunned. Now they know that the current Ken isn't the Ken they met yesterday. Both Kesha and Alvin improved their sitting positions.
Irene put her order on the table. He immediately sat down and ate what he ordered without seeing the awkward situation between us. He kept eating his bread until he realized something was wrong when he saw the four of us in turn.
“Why are you all silent?” ask with a mouth full of food.
“Why did you say it to Kesha?” ask Ken.
“Hah?” Irene replied in confusion as she placed the spoon on the plate and turned her face towards Kesha.
“I said it,” replied Kesha quietly.
“Not..”
“Will not a psychiatrist keep his patients secret?” cut Ken.
“I forced him,” replied Kesha back in a soft voice.
“Should I say this to dad?”
“Ken!!!” shout Kesha.
Kesha's shout was enough to make visitors pay attention to our table again. For the second time some people were staring at us with question mark gazes. Unlike before, now the situation is getting more complicated until some employees try to walk towards us to ascertain if something is wrong. Mr. Stephan immediately stopped the employees and made the question marks of some visitors become larger. I tried to get Ken's hand back, he pulled my hand out for the second time.
“Isn't it too much for you to react like this? Even the hand of your wife you are tepis,” said Alvin made me look directly at him.
“You said Kesha is the woman you love and you don't want her to keep remembering the embarrassing things she went through. I would also say, Zeta is the woman I love and I don't want her to remember anything sad. It was enough that he felt it once and it was enough punishment that he received by remembering it. He would continue to feel pain as long as he remembered the terrible thing that had happened to him. Me and you, we love different people in different ways.”
“Ken,” call me slowly.
“I go first. Don't follow me.”
Ken picked up his bag and immediately stepped out of the cafe leaving the spy full of curiosity. I followed his back which slowly disappeared covered in another building. Two bodyguards followed Ken and the rest remained outside the cafe. Mr. Stephan looked at me for a moment before finally stepping his foot out of the cafe.
“I'm really sorry,” said Irene.
“We'll be fine,” I said.
“The reason I hid the truth about myself was because I didn't want to burden anyone. I've had enough to burden my family, I don't want a big family to be burdened. And Ken, the reason he's like now is because he's scared. He was used to being someone I was burdened with, he didn't want others to distract me from him. He wanted to be the only person I burdened. Forgive her jealousy. Excuse me,”.
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