Mentari in the Night Sky

The Past: Death Warning

"What do you think about wearing pink clothes on someone's death anniversary?" I asked in an angry tone as soon as I saw Caroline.

"I forgot that today is Ken's mother's death anniversary, I was on a date and I was suddenly picked up. Blame Stephanie for not telling me anything. But take it easy, I'll change my clothes" he replied, showing the plastic in black clothes he might have just bought.

I took my feet away from Stephanie and Caroline to where my sisters were. This is the first time in 10 years I've attended Aunt Lily's death anniversary through the front door. All this time I always come before the guests come and I will go straight to the aunt's private room with Ken. We'll spend a whole day playing the piano in that soundproof room, playing every song we haven't had time to play. And that's why I can play the piano.

I don't know since when something I originally did just to cheer up Ken turned into something we had to do every year. We hide from our guests and family. At first all the confusion was looking for where we were going and both Ken and I hid our whereabouts during the event for 5 years until finally my two brothers caught us both in the quiet room.

At that time I still thought that our family really did not know where we were but right now I know for sure that from the beginning our family knew where we were and chose to pretendpura doesn't know. Not only did we play the piano we both did, we also read journals that aunt wrote during her life. Journals about his birth, his childhood, his teenage years, his adulthood, his encounters with Uncle Parker, his marriage, Ken's presence in his life, and premonitions of his death. There are hundreds of journals written by aunt during her lifetime, and we promise to read only 5 journals each year.

Then, how do I know if the aunt also wrote of her death premonition?

I accidentally read it before I know the order of journals written and before we make an appointment will only read 5 journals every year. Until now I have not told Ken anything about the journal containing the premonition of death. Maybe I'll let him find it himself.

Ken's house is filled with aunty's favorite flowers, white lily flowers, flowers that have the same name as him. No one knows the reason why aunty really likes white lily flowers other than because it has the same name, where the flower is a flower that is always there at every funeral. I once asked the reason and the aunt only answered because the white lily described a innocence and majesty at the same time. Something I didn't understand until now.

"She's already brought Natasha into this house,” Caroline muttered.

"Steph, can you ask your twin brother not to gossip just until this event is over?"

The question or rather William's request made me, Arthur, and the two twin sisters fall silent. He's no longer in the William mode we know. Now he is in 'heir' mode and he has to keep his attitude and speech. I looked at William who was now shaking hands and chatting with the head of the Paulo Family.

I can't imagine how much burden she would have to embrace until she could be in her current position. It is rare for an heir of his age to discuss business with other families, especially when they discuss it at a memorial event for someone's death.

"Zeta, I can't find Ken" said someone as he pulled up my sleeve.

I turned my attention to Natasha who was now standing in front of me with an anxious face. He was holding his cell phone that kept Ken's number, a number that didn't even answer the call. Arthur immediately walked towards me as soon as he saw Natasha in front of me.

"Come with me, I know where he is" I said.

Just before I was about to step my foot, Arthur was already blocking my body. He gestured me not to do anything and remained silent where I stood. Now he even shook his head as if I would get into trouble if I were to look for Ken at the moment. I followed Arthur's gaze, which was now looking at my father and father, and he was looking at me. Dad hates Ken so much, he only attends this show because Aunt Lily is his childhood friend.

"You can come along."

"Really???!" caroline's strangulation was immediately greeted by Stephanie's elbow.

I put my foot inside the Parker House. A house that used to feel familiar but now feels very foreign. A few guests who were inside the house glanced at the five of us who were now walking towards the 2nd floor. Aunt Lily's room is quite invisible from the outside because it is located at the end of the second floor. The room may also be needed every couple to get enough space, and the aunt gets the room because she wants to express herself and be free from the title of 'wife' or 'mother'. Aunty only wants to live for a few days in a year as herself, not as a wife or mother.

I'll enter the password, aunt's date of death.

"Wait here" I said.

"No," replied Arthur.

"Arthur, please. You even know the password of this room. Please?"

It was just the breath that Arthur gave. I gave Stephanie the little bag I was carrying that looked at me with a smile, in contrast to Caroline who was looking at me like she had just gotten a big bait for her gossip material.

"If you make something about this. I will not remain silent" I whispered to Caroline before entering the room.

It didn't take long for me to find Ken. Once inside the room, I could already see his back. I put my foot closer to him. He immediately looked at me and smiled, a relieved and happy smile. He put his hand to the side where he was sitting, telling me to sit next to him and read Aunt's journal.

"I was waiting for you and I ended up reading these journals first. Should we play the piano now?"

"..."

"Oiya, why did you just come? Have you forgotten or been held back by Brother Will?"

"..."

"Ken," call me slowly.

"Yes?" the answer is still busy looking for journals to give to me.

"A lot of people are looking for you outside."

"And you know I'll never get out of this room."

"Natasha's looking for you too."

"..."

"I came on purpose late" I said, finally wanting to end all this.

Ken stopped his busy hand looking for a journal and changed his focus to me.

"Now it's not me who has to do this," I continued.

"What do you mean?" I asked with a scared face.

"Aunty's bracelet is now in Natasha's hands, she should be here. She's your chosen girl. And you chose it yourself."

"..."

"I think you know, when you decide someone as the one you love, you have to start sharing your life with them. And your life also includes the pain of losing your mother."

"I don't want to listen to anything anymore. Ahh. I found a journal you should read."

I took the journal Ken gave me. He came back busy reading the journal he left behind and made me fall silent to observe the journal cover that was now on my lap. I have no desire to open this journal nor do I have the courage to go back to reading this journal.

"All my family members hate you and I want to hate you too. If you weren't a member of the Parker Family, I think my father would have killed you. Right now, isn't it strange for you to keep asking me to be by your side after all the treatment and tone you gave me?"

"..."

"You said you never loved me and there won't be a chance in the future for me, you even announced it in public. You made me give up on everything you said and did. I let you go as you want. Please release me also from the things I shouldn't do. Natasha's waiting outside, I'll let her in."

Ken immediately held my hand as soon as I stood up from where I was sitting. He looked at me with a look I had never seen. I can't interpret the meaning of that gaze because this is the first time I've seen it, a questioning look or a look of disbelief, I don't know.

"I'm.I'm...."

"Ken, the only relationship we have now is that of aunt and that is an accident. After today, you will definitely return to show your affection with Natasha in public. Today, your heart is just not used to it but after this you will get used to it. Someone you love, there's no way you're going to turn her down to go deeper into your life, right?"

"....”

"I know you never loved me and I've loved you all this time. I want to be free from this stupid feeling. I'm grateful you've found someone you love."

"I'm sorry" Ken said after 3 minutes of silence.

I was sure of my feelings as well. The feeling of love I felt was just a projection of the guilt and pity I felt for her. I fooled myself by saying that I always loved her when I knew for sure whenever my heart was pounding for her just when she showed me a weak side of herself, the side when he is easily attacked by others.

I should have apologized to him...

"I'm sorry, Ken," I said as I walked out leaving him alone.

...-----...