Mentari in the Night Sky

The Past: Responsibility

"You can tell Ken about this" Natasha opened the conversation.

I just silently looked at him without any desire to reply. Women who have been familiar with the style of feminim turned out to be able to show the style of boyish, a style that Ken hated so much. At first I thought Ken was in love with this woman because her dress style was very similar to Aunt Lily but who would have thought she seemed more comfortable with the boyish style she was wearing right now. I looked at her wrist playing the cup and there was currently no auntie bracelet on that wrist.

"Zeta," called Natasha in a soft voice, as if she thought I was daydreaming.

"I won't tell Ken anything. It's your business, not mine."

"I'm not sure I can say all this."

"You shouldn't start if you're not sure you can end it. I won't interfere about this matter, it's something you have to solve on your own. I just wanted to ask you one thing, who from the Nakamoto Family sent you? Is that Alvin's sister?"

Natasha is back playing the cup in front of her. He tried to look me in the eye several times, but he immediately lowered his face as soon as his eyes met mine. I didn't repeat my question because I knew that right now he understood I would keep waiting for answers to come out of his mouth.

"Not Alvin, I can't tell you who told me. I can only tell you if Brother Alvin has nothing to do with this."

"All right."

I stood up from where I sat. I'm just wondering who the Nakamoto family sent him. I wonder how much they really want me to get someone to seduce Ken. I also want to know what the Nakamoto Family really wants from me.

"Zeta," call Natasha in a warm tone.

Natasha's call made me undo the footsteps I was about to step into. Now I stand looking at him who is taking something out of his bag. He took out something I'm very familiar with, Aunt Lily's bracelet. The bracelet that had accompanied me grew to now and the bracelet that Ken took forcibly from my life. Natasha put the bracelet on me. He looked at me from where he was sitting, making it look like he was looking at someone who had more power and power than he did. I hate the feeling when others feel small in front of me. I really hate that feeling. I decided to sit back.

"I don't deserve this bracelet" he said as soon as I sat down.

"Don't I tell you that I won't interfere with your problems with Ken?"

"Didn't you love her? Don't you want him to come back to you?"

"You made me stop loving her."

"I....."

"I'll give you one piece of advice, tell Ken before uncle tells him. Sooner or later Ken will know all this, you only have two choices, you tell him or he knows from others. He loves you sincerely and therefore repay that sincerity" I cut.

"He never loved me" Natasha said this time in a tone she exalted.

"Natasha, there was a time when I really wanted to hate you. When you easily take the heart of someone I've wanted for a long time, that's when I really want to hate you. But I came back to realize that I did not have any feelings of hatred for anyone because it would only harm the people I hated and myself. So, please stop here before I really hate you."

"In the winter of last year, he thought I was the one who saved him and because of that the Nakamoto Family saw an opportunity with my presence then Ken could be devastated. But the truth is you saved him, Zeta."

"..."

The silence reappeared for the umpteenth time. Neither I nor Natasha wanted to break this silence. There are times when silence is better than conversation and there are times when silence is better than talking. We both know the secret we want to hide from others and we both know only we can make this secret cause no further problems in the future. But we also know the courage it takes to reveal secrets and prevent problems - not just the courage of children.

The courage to hurt others, how much courage is needed?

One year ago during the winter, the school held an event to celebrate Christmas and winter holidays. The event was already taking place from previous years, in fact it became one of the most phenomenal events in the school. Students can display their work. In addition to displaying works, students can also express their thoughts or opinions, whether for themselves, their friends, teachers, family, or school. The event is known as WE which means Winter Event and also We which means we, the students, where this event is intended for students at the Elizabeth School. This event is also the only event where students can express themselves as much as possible without fear of punishment for vilifying the school or others. Allison's family has often been targeted by some students who get scholarships, many of them voicing just how influential the Allison Family is in school.

Was I angry when Allison's family was vilified? No, I am grateful that someone voiced my heart.

Back in the last year, our class performed a drama performance. Honestly, I didn't play in that show. I didn't even help with the property. Whether it was me, Ken, Stephanie, and Caroline, the four of us just gave money to prepare for the show and the rest of us never showed our faces. There is a reason behind it all, the preparation of the show is always done on the weekends and at that time we had to attend a manners class, a class we attended from when we were kids to adults. Fortunately once we entered high school, the manners classes slowly began to dwindle to 1 time a week and it was a weekend. As we entered the 2nd semester of our first year, the grammar class really ended because the teacher who taught us always said the more mature we were then we were able to determine how we behaved. How long will this class go if we don't want it then we will only act as we please.

At the time of the WE event, no one thought there would be a blackout in the London area for a few minutes. The few minutes that made our classmate make the mistake of blowing up the property on stage because of a fire in the stick that one of the players brought hit a helium-filled balloon. For some people, blackout and of course the explosion of some property on stage enough to make them all run scared out of the hall but Ken both of it makes him re-experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD. Ken remained inside the dark hall, he even moved into the hall warehouse. The existence of the WE event certainly makes the warehouse hall a place that is rarely entered by students and that's where Ken again remembers the times where his mother died in front of his own eyes because the car he was riding exploded in the darkness of night.

It was also the first time I met Natasha. For families like the Allison and Parker Families, it is highly unlikely to have a good relationship with the scholarship recipients. We always limit ourselves to whoever it is and of course people who are not equal to us, we will stay away from him. The first time I saw him, I didn't expect him to be someone who could take Ken's heart. He helped me and Ken to call an ambulance. It was my fault that I left Ken alone with him, maybe that's when Ken thought the one who listened to all his chatter and the one who accompanied him in the dark was Natasha. From then on, the light in the warehouse turned to Natasha.

Am I sorry that the light that was supposed to be mine turned into someone else's in a matter of minutes? No, I have no regrets because I got my dream instead.

But, if I look back to the past, wouldn't I take part in this matter?

"Zeta, Ken loves me because of your shadow. Until whenever he'll love you because it's please..."

"Are you saving yourself?"

"What?" tanyanya surprised.

"You have someone you love. You could have just walked out of Ken's life and hurt him but you're too good to hurt him, right?" cut me.

"..."

"Do you want me to be the antagonist by taking on all your games?"

"That's not what I meant...."

"When you make a deal with your uncle, you have to bear the guilt in your heart. I'll take this bracelet and bear my own guilt."

"I don't have any milk..."

"Therefore love him so well that he knows nothing of your deal with his father. Can you go now? I don't want to see you."

For the second time, this white lily-carved bracelet came back to me. Unlike the first time I received it, I could directly wear it but now to touch it back I was scared. I'm afraid I'm gonna get back tied to this bracelet.

I turned my eyes to the street outside the cafe. Very quiet.

"What are you gonna do?" stephanie asked after leaving me alone for 5 minutes.

I looked at Stephanie who showed her angry face, the angry face she was aiming for Natasha as well as herself.

"I haven't thought of anything yet" I replied as I scanned the streets outside.

"Zeta!!!"

"You don't feel guilty for what you did to Ken?" my many.

"...."

"He never felt genuine love after the death of his mother. I'm afraid he'll hurt himself if he finds out all this stuff."

"But I don't want you to hurt yourself either, Zeta."

I forgot about Mrs Jasmine who was also still in this cafe. He must know everything that's going on. Honestly, I wanted to know his opinion on the matter but I did not have any courage to open my mouth asking for his opinion. I feel ashamed to be in this unhealthy environment. I'm really embarrassed.

"I'll be nice to Ken from now on" Caroline said as she hugged me.

"Hmmm, be kind to her until she is unaware of the falsehood that is nearby" I replied.

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