WORRIED

DILEMMA (Return Again)

There are things in life that we have to let go of, there are things that must be maintained. We can measure all of that. God does not always give bitterness because behind it there will be wisdom and beautiful things waiting for us. We just have to let it go. As limited as man with wish, limited to man with hope and limits man only has to return to the reality and destiny of God .Humans are only limited to humans.we do not get too high nor always low. The low height depends on the situation . We are not prophets, we are not angels. We just need to be like angels and we don't need to be like demons. Even though our lives are not spared from sin. Living in peace is the only way we can be grateful. Peace with destiny . Believe that God created a rainbow on the basis of heavy rain and then bright. And strive hard for your every happiness .

My life didn't just suffer, I was born when my father was polygamous, and when I was conceived my father married the fourth woman to be his wife. I was born to a strong mother (it was an amazing gift). He carried a heavy burden throughout his life. There are many things I can take away from my mother's journey. Give up love even if it shares in a marriage bond. Polygamy is not bad. Father gives life to a widow who has no husband. He fed some children who were not his flesh blood even though it was only a little.

Grow up to be a child with exceptional maternal tenderness, even without paternal affection. It's too stupid if I have to waste my life because of my father. I have a lot of brothers who love me. Losing Raka is no problem for me. I have much more to hold onto . It is self-happiness

(inner)

thank you for being such a great woman. Now I can let it go thanks to you. You are an example . I'll be like you letting go of what should have been let go. May I always find happiness in my future.

" where are you going today?" teteh broke my daydream. I went back to eating the breakfast that was served on the table.

" i want to go around yogya tea" I said enthusiastically.

" megan mas brama can't take you for a walk because he has to supervise the student exam, is that okay?" mas Brama spoke with his Javanese accent that was so thick

" it's okay, Megan can be alone. Teteh also do not have to worry well" I said to see teteh with a worried face.

"it's fine if you don't bother with this baby boy to want to accompany you because it's been a long time it's like you don't take a vacation pampering the eyes" spicy satire, teteh winked at mas brama who was looking at him with a smile.

" later patient darling, we are on vacation after my honoror liquid hehehehe" mas brama's smile saw the face of the still pouting.

" it's okay mas I understand" tidied up the dining table because we all finished breakfast .

"mas be careful well" teteh waved at her husband to go out of the yard after saying goodbye.

"megan you use a tourist guide no" asked teteh who saw me still relaxed.

" not tea like myself" I replied by still cleaning the items I would carry.

" good is. You don't go home too late . If the night does not maksain go home mening nginep hotel because the road to this direction is prone to "mess my needs like mamah .

" okay teteh, tea borrow your camera dong" I whine.

"in a moment, you carried a long time ago arkanda "have given my cute baby to me. I also carried it carefully. But not long ago anganda may not be comfortable I carry because it is still stiff.

" jup jup jup" I cuddled the still-crying arkanda. I tried to justify the position of my hand to make arkanda more comfortable. And he managed to stop crying.

" arkanda sholeh, funny-looking" I stared at this white baby's face. Wanting to pinch her cheek but surely she cried again.

" this is the camera, you quickly go to the hot hunt later, continue not to wear a sweater like it will overheat, but already nyiapin 2 tops" keep the camera and 2 white blouses.

*styleku*

" it can be feminine now" sneered after seeing my clothes.

" huh can dong, I leave now yes tea" I kiss the hands of teteh then say hello to teteh.

My destination this time, I want to go to a historic place that is Tebing breksi.Quite a distance from the house teteh I use a vehicle that I have rented with the driver to go there. Not only me, many domestic tourists who participated in the car. After arriving at the breccia cliff I installed my camera tripod. I took a picture there. The beautiful scenery plus the hot sun that appears makes my photo hasik quite good.

During the day I looked for a restaurant near the breccia. Not like before, after my band released the album, my honor is not too little for fun so I no longer have to think about the price if I want to just eat. I can eat whatever I want without seeing the pricelist .After eating lunch, I continued my tour, I want to go to prambanan temple. Want to see the history directly how the temple stands.

There I photographed the temple with my camera focus lens. The old temple bears witness to the history of this country. I asked other tourists to take pictures of me in front of the temple . Today I was satisfied to take a walk, it seemed like the thought of Raka slightly disappeared.

Dusk has revealed itself. Slowly disappearing in the morning. At night I went to the Yogyakarta monument and bought souvenirs around the malioboro street.

I brought gifts for you and my family, for you and my friends. Satisfied shopping I also rented another car to go home to the area.

" assalamualikum" I entered the tiny house because the door was open. There is absolutely no one . Maybe teteg was mengelon arkanda and mas brama was asleep. I entered the living room

(inner) who's asleep in my room. Masa mas brama sleeps here.

I saw someone sleeping in the bed. Turned towards the entrance. Seeing that body I felt so familiar.

I approached the bed he was sleeping on. Slowly leaning over to see his face. And again I saw Raka sleeping soundly.

"Rakaa" I shouted with a shrieking voice and a shocked expression.

Teteh and mas brama who heard my screams immediately approached me. While Raka was still rubbing her eyes while sitting towards me.

" why are you yelling?" I was upset because my voice was so loud.

" Why is he here?" I pointed at Raka who was still collecting her life.

" i'm sorry I forgot to tell you, he came here this afternoon looking for you. Due to exhaustion, I told him to rest here" a smile kept on saying that he was lying

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