The Light of ANAS

Finding The Ex

A year has passed, and many things happened during that time, including the marriage of Dandy and Arini which took place magnificently two months after the breakup of Naz and Arfin, which was held, also a week later the wedding of Nervan and Maira was held in large quantities, after finally getting the blessing of the grandfather who initially disagreed. But with the persuasion of his parents and his two brothers Nervan, coupled with the presence of Shanala was able to melt his grandfather's heart. Maira who has been able to see again with an eye donor from the late Bude Hafsah until now did not know about it, because everyone kept it a secret, because everyone kept it a secret, all he knew was to get a donor from someone who had died and while still alive wanted to donate part of his organs to those in need. And the death of Bude Hafsah was told when Maira was completely healed after surgery after the bandage in her eyes had been opened.

Raline was able to accept Bu Mira as her birth mother and often met her, even occasionally staying at her house. Especially after Ms. Mira was sick, Raline often stayed there to take care of her mother until she breathed her last. It made Raline feel a deep sadness including Naz. Raline has just been reunited with her birth mother, but has had to separate again for good, and now Raline and Elsa are orphans.

Naz who has returned to being a jolly girl and has now begun to learn adult and not childish anymore, even now he is good at cooking because it is often taught by his mother, Mama, but the nature of the rancid and potent is still there, maybe it is ingrained. While Arfin disappeared as if swallowed by the earth, he seemed to follow Naz's wish not to appear before Naz again, even at Dandy's wedding, his best friend did not attend, just like when Nervan and Maira had a wedding party, Arfin did not attend it as well. No one knows where Arfin is other than his family and they seem to cover his existence, even though the question is Mr. Syarief or Mother Anita.

Naz, who has since ascended to the third grade, has been living with his biological parents, because Father and Mother are always busy with their respective jobs, whereas Naz needs a mentor in his learning to face the UN later. It was for this reason that Ms. Rahmi, who was only a housewife, asked and persuaded Mother to allow Naz to stay with her, and Naz also gave the condition that he was willing to stay at his biological parents' house as long as Elsa was also allowed to live there, so that he could study with Raline and Elsa. But still once a week Naz also likes to stay at his mother's house.

This Sunday Naz and his three best friends gathered at Kiara's house to do schoolwork and as usual took place in the gazebo on the terrace next to Kiara's house. After completing the task, Kiara brought her niece who had just woken up to the gazebo. But when her brother came to bring her niece back, Kiara discussed the incident that caused her brother to almost miscarry one year ago, and Kiara keceplosan if at that time he met Nervan who turned out to be waiting for Arfin who was sick. It took Naz by surprise and recalled the events from a year ago.

“Sick..?? she's sick..? what pain Ra ??”, asked Naz surprised.

“Gue didn't know Naz,, just knew he was sick, and had been treated for three days Bang Evan said, uh sorry Naz,,,,, and,,, I don't mean to ngingetin lo same dia”, said Kiara felt guilty.

Naz's memory seems to go back to that time, when he met Arfin at the cemetery and when he met at the lake, he said,

"He's sick ?? what pain?,, it's appropriate that he's pale then,, my God, what's the reason for him,,?? No,, no, no way,, no way”. Naz muttered inwardly as he smothered his mouth and shook his head in disbelief at what he thought himself.

“Naz,,, Naz,,, you're okay right??”, Kiara wiggles a dreamy Naz.

“Naz, you are fine right?”, Ruby was also worried.

Naz broke his daydream, "Ra, why didn't you tell me at the time, if he was sick?”.

“Yes,,, At that time I wanted to tell you, but my words were cut because Mommy called you at that time, and pas lo said you want to go to the hospital, I think you want to look at him”, Kiara explained while remembering.

“Gue did not know Ra,, at that time I went to the hospital to see the late Bude,,,”, said Naz who was still shocked and in disbelief, “Pantesan aja at that time he looks pale,,, is that maybe the reason he suddenly so far me? Is that why he doesn't want to marry me? Is she seriously ill Ra??” Naz said.

“Udahlah Naz, do not think about him anymore,, the person also has already said this,, you do not need to want the past again, mending thinking about the future you aja deh,,,,,, you do not need to look at the past again,,, especially tomorrow will be the semester exam,, it is better to focus on going to deh”, said Ruby who did not want to see Naz back down.

“Iya Naz, we better focus on just making the test tomorrow,, besides this is the task of our study tour travel report has settled faster and stayed in print…so after the exam we can be happy-go-lucky”, said Kiara.

Then Naz's phone rang indicating there was an incoming message, which turned out to be from Mr. Udin, “Guys, I went home first yes, Mr. Udin already in front of”, I'm in front of him, said Naz who then put the laptop in his laptop bag, then say goodbye to his three friends and Kiara's parents, then he went home with Mr. Udin.

During the trip, Naz kept thinking about it,

“Is he possibly seriously ill? That's why he's more willing to leave me than I'm sad to know? Then where has he been all this time?,, has he died??,, Arghhh no way, if he died surely Kak Dandy and Mas Hardi know,,,, Arghhh,,,,, you know,,, why the hell should I think of him again”, Naz muttered inwardly.

During this one week Naz focused on his semester exams, but after finishing, he again remembered his thoughts about Arfin, because curiosity seemed to continue to haunt him. He felt confused to ask who, while the friends of Arfin alone no one knows the existence of Arfin. Suddenly comes across a crazy idea in his mind to go to Arfin's parents' house.

Because today has not been effective in learning, Naz also came home sooner than school.

“Pak Udin, we do not go straight home ya”, Naz said to the driver.

“Oh yes Non, then where are we going?”, asked Mr Udin who just drove the car.

“Emmm,,, we go to his house Om Latief yes, Mr Udin know the address?”, said Naz.

“I know Non, yes ready,,, ”.

Actually in Naz's heart there was a sense of dag dig dug, shame and fear to go there, because this was the first time he went to the house again after a year never to be there again. Let alone to set foot in the house, communicate with Miss Hinda was never done, as if the breakup with Arfin then also broke communication with his family, be it with Miss Hinda or Nervan, except for Lebaran six months ago and that was the last time they met.

“Oh,, yasalam, is this the right thing,,,,? really embarrassed to actually have to ask this to Aunt Hinda, but rather than I keep thinking and guessing that no-no,, maybe this is better”, Naz murmured in his heart.

After traveling for a while, Naz arrived in front of the gate of Mr. Latief's house. As usual, the gatekeeper asked for the identity and purpose of coming to the house to meet with whom, and after being told, the guard opened the gate and let the car that Naz was riding in. And then Naz's car passed by a car that was about to get out.

Naz got out of his car and set foot on the porch. A sense of stubbornness, nervousness, fear, uneasiness mixed into one, the shadow of those times re-present in his memory, the time when he was first brought to this house by Arfin without knowing this was the home of his parents, the time when he was well received by both parents, the time when she learned to cook with her Mami Arfin. The smile also seemed to decorate the step-by-step that he went through, however, sadness also appeared when he remembered the last time he came to this house that reminded him of the incident that made it seem heavy to step. He stopped when he almost set foot on the terrace, but he remembered his purpose again.

“Pacify yourself Rheanazwa,, do not baper,,, you have nothing to do with him anymore,, remember your purpose of coming here just to ask for an explanation, so that your curiosity can be answered and you can feel calm “, he said in his heart to calm himself. Naz took a deep breath, then he continued his steps, and after arriving at the door, he pressed the doorbell of the house with a trembling hand.

Ting nong,,, ting nong,,,, after he twice pressed the bell, then someone opened the door.

“Assalamu’alaikum Bi Darmi”, Naz said with a smile.

“Wa’alaikumsalam,,, Non,, Miss Naz,,,”, Bi Darmih answered the greetings and felt surprised by the arrival of Naz.

“Aunt why? How come I see me like I see a ghost?”, Naz asked in wonder.

“Ahh,, no anything Non,, let's please enter”, he said please, and Naz stepped into the house, then welcome to sit in the living room. Naz continued to sigh as if stabilizing his feelings as if he continued to imagine the past while in the house.

“Before Non,, Aunty get me a drink,,,”, said Bi Darmih.

“Eh, Bi,, don't bother,, I'm here to meet Aunt Hinda, does she have?”, Tanya Naz.

“Mrs... Emm,,, anu,,, emmm, Madam just left after receiving call”, she stammered.

“Go?? What was the car that just passed me?.. if you can know where Aunt Hinda went, Bi?”, asked Naz again.

“Ma.. sorry Non,, Aunty doesn't know”, she replied nervously.

Naz who saw the strange Bi Darmih gelagat since he came, he also felt suspicious, “Bi,, if you may know Kak Arfin is now where?”, Naz ventured to ask the whereabouts of Arfin.

“Sa, me,, anu Non,, I don't know, Non”, he said in stammering.

“Bi,, Aunty do not lie,,,”, said Naz who saw Bi Darmih look nervous like that, “Kalo Bibi would not tell her whereabouts,, if so please Aunt answered honestly,,, is he okay? or he's sick”, Naz asks again.

“Emm,, anu Non, Den Arfin is fine, Non don't worry”, Bu Darmin continues to answer nervously.

“Bi, please Aunty answer honestly,, from earlier Aunty looks nervous as if she is hiding something I should not know,, right??”, from there on, tanya Naz who then stood over to Bi Darmih.

“Eng,, do not do Non”, he replied again.

“Bi, please I beg you,, Aunty must know something right,,,?? Bi, is Brother Arfin sick?”, Naz again asked about Arfin's condition, but he did not get an answer from Bi Darmih who instead subdued his face and silent as if feeling afraid, but he did not get an answer, then Naz held Bi Darmih's two hands, “Bi, please answer, is it true that Arfin is sick?? She's sick what Bi?? He suffered from what disease Bi?”, he asked so that no tears fell down his cheeks. ”Bi,, please answer.hiks hiks”, he said as he sobbed.

“Iy Yes Non,,,”, Bi Darmih finally replied because he could not bear to see Naz crying and Naz felt surprised to hear it.

“Sorry Non, Aunty does not know Den Arfin what pain”, This time Bi Darmih replied without fear and nervousness.

“Auntie don't lie anymore..hiks hiks,,, I kindly tell me she is sick what Bi,,, hiks hiks”, Naz said continue to plead.

“Aunt swear, Aunty does not know what pain Den Arfin,,, it's just,,,”, his speech stopped for a moment.

“What's Bi?? Hiks hiks,, just what?”, Tanya Naz while shaking Bu Darmih's hand.

“Only Bibi ever heard that the Madam told Den Arfin that it was only the verdict of the doctor and the doctor was not God who could determine everything”, he said, said Bi Darmih and Naz also released Bi Darmih's hand, he dropped himself onto the chair while smothering his mouth because he was very surprised to hear Bi Darmih's answer.

His heart was so painful to hear it, the feeling of tightness was increasingly felt in the chest, his body felt weak to hear the word ‘vonis doctor’ , and the one in Naz's mind, if so, if so, it is likely that Arfin suffered from severe disease, tears continued to flow rapidly with sobs of pain.

Deep regret now he felt, when he remembered how he spoke one last time with Arfin until he said Arfin was a liar who could play tricks on him, he said he hated Arfin very much, and he remembered his words so that Arfin would not appear before him again. He was imagined with a pale face Arfin who kept his head down and continued to say sorry to him.

“How stupid am I, why can't I realize that at that time his face looks pale because he is sick,, torment him,,, he must have been very hurt by my words,, hysterics,, I was stupid, I was stupid,,,, huhuhuhu,,,, “, Naz felt guilty and his tears broke instantly.

"I should have asked him the reason and asked him for an explanation, but I instead waited for him to explain and deduce himself without knowing the true reality,, huhuhuhu,,, hyx hysterics,,,”.

“Non, Den Arfin did that so that Miss is not sad at a later date”, said Bi Darmih.

“Now where is Bi?? Please tell me Bi,,, hiks hiks”, Naz again holds Bi Darmih's hand.

“Aibi Apologize,, Aunty really-can't tell her whereabouts,, which surely Den Arfin there is fine”, the answer remains the same.

“What is he in the hospital??”, asked Naz.

“Not Non,, Aunty apologizes, Aunty really can't tell her whereabouts, Den Arfin himself asked not to tell anyone… what is certain is that Den Arfin is in good condition,, “, he said while looking down, “And Bibi asked that Miss not tell anyone that Miss got information from Aunty,,, madam will definitely be angry,, maybe Miss should just forget about Den Arfin,, it's the best for Nona”, he said at length.

Naz wiped his tears with both palms, then he stood up, “Kalo so I say Bi, thanks, sorry I have interrupted Bibi's work,,, Assalamu’alaikum”, he said, who then left after Bi Darmih answered his greetings.

While on the way home Naz continues to cry over his deep regret, Naz hopes to find out Arfin's whereabouts and meet him, “Why did you hide your sorrow from me,, while you always ask me to share my sorrow with you, where are you.

Since knowing that Naz tried to find out the whereabouts of Arfin, he asked Hardi for help to ask the whereabouts of Arfin to Nervan, because he is his best friend so it will not cause suspicion, so it will not cause suspicion, but still did not produce any information, Nervan really cover it even though it was from his own friend.

By forced Naz told everything to Papa and his Mama about the reason for his relationship with Arfin, then he told him that Arfin was sick. They were very surprised to hear all of Naz's explanations, and he begged his parents for help to find Arfin's whereabouts on the grounds that he wanted to apologize because for a few days he continued to be haunted by guilt.

At first both of Naz's parents refused and instead suggested that Naz forget Arfin, because they were afraid that one day Naz would feel much greater sadness and pain than now. But Naz continued to plead even to the point of threatening to go alone looking for the whereabouts of Arfin who was somewhere, finally his two parents were willing to help.

Bu Rahmi who is a gang with Bu Hinda tried to pry information by pretending to ask the news of all her children, including Arfin news, but still did not get information on the whereabouts of Arfin. Mr. Syarief was the same, did not get any info from his best friend who is his Papi Arfin. Naz was already feeling desperate because it had been a few days trying to remain uninformed of the existence of Arfin, even he contacted Rezki, Rezki, his brother who lives in America through a video call connection was also not getting information.

Today's the day of the school report, Naz didn't go to school because she felt bad, so she went to school without Naz herself. He just slept in his room, “You where the hell is it ?? it's very difficult to find him,, it feels like looking for a needle in a haystack you know not.”, uccap Naz while looking at a photo of Arfin that he had stored in his email first.

Suddenly his phone rang indicating an incoming call.

“Hallo, assalamu’alaikum Bunda”, his greeting.

“Wa’alaikumsalam,, Dek, Mama you said you were sick yes,, what pain oruh deck? How did you end up being ririwit?”, Mommy seems to be worried about her daughter who is not living with her.

“No matter what Mother,, just a few days already sleep-deprived, so now want to sleep,,, this is also just waking up, the breakfast abis sleeping again“, replied Naz.

“Don't like the noise or, Deck, if there is a task mah ya do day or afternoon, not night, and it's not too often play hape until late at night,,,,, and,,, kan gini nih so,, uh bentar yes this is a message from Ina”, Mommy opens a chat message from her sister, Mommy,

“Astagfirullah,,, innalilahi,,,”, said Mother was shocked when reading the message.

“What's Mother? Aunt Ina why?”, Naz asked in panic.

“Dek,, Ayunda her son Ina had an accident this morning while leaving for school”, Mommy informed the contents of the message from her sister.

“Innalillahi,, how is Mother?”, asked Naz worried.

“Bentar, Mommy hang up the phone first yes, want to call your Aunt first”, said Mother who also panicked.

“Iya, Mommy, later tell me ya”, said Naz.

“Iya,, Assalamu’alaikum..”, Mother then ended their conversation.

“Wa’alaikumsalam, Bunda”, replied Naz and hung up.

After waiting for a while, Mommy again informed him that Ayunda was seriously injured and is currently in a coma, so he intends to go to Surabaya, and Naz also forced to join. Mommy continued to forbid it but he threatened to go alone to Surabaya if not invited, finally Mommy invited Naz to participate and Bu Rahmi also allowed it despite being worried because Naz was not feeling well. But Naz is not his name if he does not have 1001 ways to get permission from his mother.

Naz, Mommy and Mr. Rizal left for Surabaya with a flight at 06.30 am, they arrived in Surabaya an hour and a half later. And when they just arrived, Mommy got a message that Ayunda was dead, and now she was on her way to the funeral home to be buried. Naz also ordered a taxi online to take them to the house of Aunt Ina, Mother's sister.

After traveling for a grand hour, they arrived at the residence of Aunt Ina which had begun to be crowded with mourners. They entered and immediately approached Aunt Ina who was crying hysterically. Mother immediately hugged her youngest sister to calm her down, while Mr. Rizal approached Pak Purnomo Aji, her husband Aunt Ina who was also crying over the departure of her second daughter. While Naz followed his mother and sat among the other three children, then hugged his sister Ayunda who continued to cry to help calm him, even though he himself felt sad.

Suddenly a new person came and when the man greeted Om and his father, his voice seemed familiar to Naz's ears. As he turned his eyes to the person, how surprised he was to see that person.

“Kak Arfin,,,, “, , he smiled and he kept looking at the man who was talking to Om and his father. The man who had been away from him for a year, but still resided in his heart, the man who these days has always been in search of his existence, the man who taught him how to strengthen himself, the man who introduced her to the beautiful meaning of love, and only then did he realize that he really missed the man despite his status now is his former lover.

"I finally found you, the ex-boyfriend" Naz muttered inwardly with a smile.

---------- TB ------------------------ TB

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Finally met the needle,,, uhh the owner of the needle,, oppsss….

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