The Hurt

Love in the Heart

A year ago I loved the guy who was always present and accompany me every day. He was Hendra Bartholomew, my best friend since we were in High School. An accidental introduction made us friends until now. And I never thought I'd fall in love with him. His kind, kind nature, and concern made me fall for him. But I never put it up to him. The shame that made me until now never revealed it until now. And that's also I never knew if Hendra had the same taste for me.

***

“Icha” greet someone

I was shocked, then turned around.

“Hendra, you just ngaggettin, the habit of dech make people hang. Fortunately my heart is not dislodged, klo coppot you mw what ngantiin” said sebel.

“Hehehe, sorry my abisnya loe funny if shocked, so the cave kagetin dech” said Hendra cengegesan, and I can only sing lips.

“Ih, ugly know if loe manyun like that. Mending loe smile more beautiful hehehe” said Hendra,

“Hahaha, you can just Hendra” I said with a laugh

For a moment we were silent…

“Hm, Icha cave mw story to loe” said Hendra smiling, looks like he is very happy

“What?” I said while reading the book I had read earlier

“Gua... cave in love, cave in love Icha” said Hendra smile, I smile happily, I smile happily,

“Is this the answer to do’a ku slama this” I said in my heart

“Do Hendra have the same taste to me” continued me in the heart

“Loe asked Angel, SMP cave temen ever cave storyain” asked Hendra, I just nodded.

“Gua likes to him, cave in love to Angel” said Hendra

As soon as my heart was stuck with thousands of swords, it hurt to know Hendra liked his Junior High friend whom he told me so much. Which he adores this slama. The most popular girl and her close friend Hendra when she was in Junior High. Which always makes me cry every night when I imagine what he always told me about his old Junior High friend. I don't feel my tears dripping.

“Loe gk anything Icha” asked Hendra confused, when he saw me crying.

“Ehm... um. i... um.. I gpp koq Ndra” said while wiping my tears, I do not want Hendra know if I was crying

“Truly loe gpp?” ask Hendra to make sure

“iya I gpp koq Ndra, relax. Um, wait, Ndra I'm out first. Go to.. to the perpus first, there is a task. Bye Ndra” said I immediately left Hendra who was confused to see my behavior earlier.

I ran to the back garden of the school, where I used to be with Hendra the first time I met and where I was always alone when I was sad. I was crying all over there. Take out all the pain in my heart.

“Hendra, if you know I love you, I love you. But why don't you understand that, why. I am better than him, I love you more sincerely, but why should you like him Ndra why” I said on the sidelines of my crying

“I love you Hendra, I love you Hendra. HENDRA I LOVE YOU” I shouted

***

These few days I rarely hang out with ma Hendra. Ever since Hendra became Angel, I rarely went with him, he also rarely greeted me when I was in class, or in the cafeteria. Even I'm sick he never hugged me let alone worry about me like he used to. To the extent that I have stage 4 brain cancer, he never knew. He is too busy with his new life with Angel.

One day, somehow Hendra was looking for me. When he was in my class, he didn't find me.

“Eh, brag” said Hendra to one of my classmates.

“Iya what's wrong?”

“Icha today where, koq cave from earlier did not meet him. usually early in the morning he uadh in class” asked Hendra

“Oh icha, he hasn't been to school for a week.he said he was sick.” said my friend was one class

“What…! pain, what pain is he?” ask Hendra to worry.

“Gua also did not know, mending loe to the hospital, the cave was horrified he entered the hospital, already yes gua mw entered class” said Temenku

Hendra could only fall silent, then immediately leave.

@HOSPITAL

“Sorry Sus, if I can ask where the patient room named Icha Rastanti” asked Hendra to a Sister.

“Oh, Icha Rastanti she is in the ICU.” room the Sister said.

“ICU Sus, hm yes already thanks Sus” said Hendra. Then he ran towards the ICU room where I am now.

“Icha loe knapa sich, make the cave worry aja” said Hendra in his heart.

When he was in front of the door of the ICU room, he opened the door. He saw me helpless in my bed. Hendra can't believe I'm like gini.

“Icha loe koq can like gini sich” said Hendra in disbelief, and I can only smile.

“I'm okay koq Ndra, I just tired aja koq” I said lying. I don't want Hendra to grow worried about my illness waiting for a few hours to take my life.

“Cave of disbelief, loe it hurts Icha, honestly loe sick what.do you want cave more worry heh” said Hendra slightly snapped

“Icha please loe honestly to cave loe sick what, please” said Hendra pleading.

“I... aaa.. Kuu has end-stage brain cancer and said Doctor I will not last long” I said in tears.

Hendra was instantly limp when I was honest about my illness. I can only cry.

“No way, you must have doubled, must have been the wrong Doctor, must have been the wrong Doctor” said Hendra

“Neither Ndra, the Doctor was right and it seems like my time is only a short time Ndra” I said

“Icha loe don't talk like that, loe should heal please loe should heal” said Hendra crying. I never saw Hendra cry. As long as we were together, I never saw her cry. This was the first time I saw her crying for me.

“Sorry Ndra I can't, I'm not strong, I'm tired of all this. I want to rest for ever, please sincerely me yes Ndra to go. Thank you for making me my best friend, and filling my last days with smiles. And let me hug you one last time, please”, I asked Hendra,

“iya Icha yes” said Hendra, then hugged me, I smiled with satisfaction and could leave this world quietly and happily. I closed my eyes with a happy feeling.

***

Maybe this is my destiny

Admire without being loved

It's okay for me, as long as you're happy

With your life, with your life

I've been feeling that for a long time, though,

Waiting for your heart to welcome me

It is okay for me your love is

Happy for me, happy for me

I want you to know

I am here waiting for you

Even though I wait until the end of my time

And hope this taste is forever

And let me just hug you this time,

Say goodbye forever

And let this feel happy for a moment,

In a public cemetery complex, there is one tomb surrounded by many people who wear all black clothes. There was also a young man holding a gravestone that read Icha Rastanti while crying.

“Cha why you quickly leave the cave.The days of the cave are quiet without loe. Please wake up Cha. Cave kangen smile loe, cave kangen sound loe it. Please wake up icha please” said Hendra while shaking the headstone that was stuck on the mound of the tomb.

“Already Hendra, let Icha go, he was calm there” said Bundaku

“Oh yes one more, this is Icha deposit before he leaves. he said if he has left, this box tell love to you. Yes Aunty lives first” said Bundaku

“Still Aunt” said Hendra.

Then he opened the box given to me by my mother. In view of the contents of the box, in the box there are photos of us when we were together and there is a letter.

“To HENDRA BARTHOLOMEW

Ndra, maybe when you get my letter, I'm not by your side anymore. I may be gone forever.

Hendra, I want to be honest with you, all this time I like your ma, I love you, but I dare not express my feelings to you. I'm ashamed Ndra, I'm ashamed. I'm also afraid that if I'm honest with you, you're going to leave me alone. I've decided that I feel this way.

You remember when you were ma Angel, I was very sad. let alone you are rarely with me. I am more sad, and very sad. I can not show my sadness to you, I can not show my sadness to you, I don't want you to be sad to see me sad.

Ndra you have to promise me, you will not be sick let alone make Angel disappointed. I beg you to promise me. let my love is my heart, became the most beautiful memory in my life

Thank you Ndra, you have wanted to be my best friend all my life.

I LOVE YOU HENDRA

Icha”

Hendra just cried, he didn't think I liked him all this time.

“Icha sorryin cave, bodo cave. The cave is not aware if you like to go to the cave. Maafin cave Cha sorryin cave.” said Hendra in his tears

“Cua promises Cha grotto will be happyin Angel, the cave will not make him sick let alone disappointed. Goodbye Cha hope you calm down there” said Hendra with a smile. Then left my grave and also my spirit who had seen him since.

“Happy way Hendra, I will always be in your heart even though I can't be by your side” I said then my spirit went swept away by the wind.