Love Me Because of God

My Love is Real

Saturday, 16. 30 WIBS.

I waited. Yep. I waited in the backyard of my school, not far from the prayer place where I prayed. Here, I'll meet him. With a neat school uniform but my hair is still messy, not undo my intentions.

Because today is farewell class XII, so I'm wearing a white-gray uniform. The event was so red and washed away our feelings. So pathetic indeed. Every meeting there must be a farewell. However, the show was full of energy. The shouts, cheers, chants of the students boomed in the air. It was nice at the time. All our grievances and laughter will never be found again in college.

Yep. After the show ended, our time ended. Togetherness and a sense of kinship that is so thick, we build starting from zero. Weight. My chest's tight. When you have to remember the good memories with them. Friends–my beloved friend. But, we all hope that our feelings will not wear off by the distance and time that separates.

It's true said “ People The most beautiful time is the time when SMA, because in that time we will begin to know more about ourselves and others. And we can also get to know the period of falling in love with the opposite sex more seriously. And in this time too, our characters will be in shape and in poles” That word can only be understood in this moment, in my last moment with them.

“Assalamualaikum?”

“W.. Wa—wa’alaikumsalam!” I'm appalled. And in a somewhat stammering manner I answered his greetings.

He was in front of me. Astagfirullahal. It turned out that I was daydreaming, thinking about farewell. However, he seemed to understand her. His face is bright. His skin was slightly white and his clothes looked matching. She wears a white skirt and wears a long-sleeved shirt and her thick veil that covers the aura looks so graceful. He almost perfected his hijab. Even so, it is very rare to find a girl who is seventeen years old, willing to close her aura. Most of them are usually just that. Yep. This is quite a concern for the Muslims in this area. For it is on this basis that the rohis in our school are in form.

With the support of the principal and the Islamic Ormas, our rohis (spiritual Islam) walked. Rohis is also a means of improvement and self-reflection for Islamic youth. Is he right? Is what he does in accordance with the law?. Questions like this will be answered and discussed well in Rohis.

I also joined rohis. Although initially only follow doang. Now it's getting more serious. Serious to live according to Islamic law. Islam is beautiful. Islam is firm. Islam is soft. Islam is easy. My words cannot express how wonderful it is to live so close to our religion.

“Kak... What do you need, Sis?” Ask me with his innocent attitude.

Although a little rough, chatty, sometimes his words often redden the ears, but his heart is so soft. Yep. The question is starting to make me nervous. Baffled. Don't know where to start. I am ashamed of being inconsistent.

In the distance I saw my friend Job brandishing his index finger. Even though it only looks like part of his hand, I already know that it's him. That's the Code! My heart and mind are starting to open. That's because Job told me to be frank with this girl. Before long, the figure of the hand disappeared behind the wall. Thank you, Yub. To this day you still give me support. You are one of my best friends. I took a breath and exhaled slowly. My heart is starting to calm down a little. Relax more.

I've already said it. Then I answered the girl's question.

“There's something important I want to tell you?”

“Hmm.. What is it, Brother?” Ask me back.

“Actually..”.

“What's the truth, Brother?” Again he asked.

It seems he was really serious about this conversation. I should be able to. Got to!. I made up my mind not to let her down.

“Actually you already know how I feel for you?”

“Ak.” The girl was surprised.

Her face flushed. He looked embarrassed. Unable to say a word, the girl fell silent. She held tightly to her skirt.

“I also know how you feel about me”

Hearing the continuation of my words the girl was dumbfounded. A while later, he made a small stir while covering his face which began to appear reddish which was blushing with his hands.

“Ah!!”

“D—From M—Where do you know?” He's so nervous. His movements are irregular.

“Relax, Aisyah” Say me to him with nadadatar.

I tried to calm him down. And succeeds seamlessly. He was calm at that moment. When I say his name softly. Yep. Name's Aisyah. He couldn't look me in the eye. So did I. However, this fiercely turbulent heart was extremely difficult to conquer. Right now, I really want to be with him. Staring at him continues. But, I have to hold it. Sometimes my eyes get out of control.

“It doesn't matter at the moment, Aisyah!. Because there are things I will say that are much more important than that.” I confirmed my voice.

“I—Iya... What would you like to tell me?” Ask back.

“You better forget me, Aisyah”

Hearing this, he fell silent. Stiff. His face is expressionless. I know exactly how she felt at the time. Like a soul struck by a powerful lightning from the sky. Our mood was completely silent. The wind sounded in my ears. “Woooshh” is what I heard.

I don't know what to say, especially. I was just waiting for a response from him. We were silent for more than thirty seconds. I heard he was a serighfar. Then he lifted himself up, he looked at me and said

“Why does sister say that? Why, Brother?” He was so curious. I put on a confused expression and answered his question.

“That's because..” slowly my words are silent. I started thinking again. Argha! I have to commit. I have to be brave. Then I connected my words a little loudly.

“because I'm afraid you're going to experience pain and a very heavy longing. I'm afraid you can't concentrate on your lessons, I'm afraid you'll be ostracized by your classmates. I'm afraid, I'm really afraid you'll move to another heart. Dan—”

“How about your own sister?” As fast as lightning he cut my words.

And when I turned my face to her. I'm appalled. Eyes glazed. Trying to hold back her tears. His expression was so strong, it was seen and painted how much he cared for me on his face. I was so stupid. YOU MORON!!! I know so much about Aisyah's feelings. But there is little I know of him. I spontaneously answered.

“Of course! I will still love you. Although—”

“I am too, Kak” Sambarnya with a slightly high tone.

How surprised my mind. I can only be surprised to hear it. It was the first time I got a really serious response about love. Wonderful and happy to mix.

“Kakak must have asked “Why?” Why would a seventeen-year-old girl be so serious about this, isn't she?”

He sighed. Then walk to the right. After a few steps, he stopped. And continue his words

“It's because..”

At that moment he turned his eyes straight on me while continuing his words

“That's because my feelings for you aren't kidding, sister. Maybe that sounds like a lot to a childish sister. Too childish. But, its real. You know, My love for you is real. Tap—” Did not have time to continue the sentence, I cut and said quite loudly.

“But, what if I don't become a successful person?, what if I become a vagabond out there?, Will you still wait for me? Can you still hold back and keep that feeling?. No!! Aye right? You won't be able to Aisyah.”

“Kak...Kak.. ? Big brother really funny anyway.”.

“Any funny thing, Aisyah” Many wonder

“Resid.. This sister is funny..”.

“?”

“So I did not really study my words earlier apparently..”.

She smiled sweetly. His face looks bright. There was no doubt on his face. Eyes sparkling. Then continue his words.

“Kak. I love you not because of your looks. I also love you not because of your friendly attitude towards everyone. Nor is it because of your soft speech and your lameness.

Nor because of Matter, But. I love you because of Allah”.

The words Aisha spoke echoed in my ears. My feeling is so strange It feels like something so heavy. Yep. Guilt. His words were clear that I was overdoing it with him. Good attention, care, to my love. It turned out to produce such a complicated result. I explained to Aisyah.

“—Sorry Aisyah!. Pardon me! I'm really sorry, Aisyah! Unbeknownst to me, I've made you like this. Put you in a very difficult position. For a woman your age, this will be an obstacle for you.”

“Who said?” Again, he cut a string I said.

This time his expression was so strong. Convincingly.

“Subhanallah. Brother cares too much about me. Until I forget my sister. Brother forgot what his real purpose was. ”

“Tap—” I didn't have time to interrupt.

He continued to say softly. Her tone and vocal are so harmonious I hear. I just kept quiet and kept listening to him. Then he stopped for a moment. Then continue his words again

“One more time I'll say it, Kak”

“?”

“Aisha loves sister because of Allah. So don't worry about moving forward. Whatever choice you make, that's what's best for you. And that's what's best for me right now. When you leave, I'm ready to take the risk. To endure this pain and longing. I will always pray to God to be given the strength to endure it. Give peace of mind and coolness of mind. Didn't my own brother tell me “The fool is in God's hands. God has prepared a soul mate that suits us. If we have a strong desire, work hard and always have merit with Him. Allah has a better plan than what you expect. Allah is All-Aware of what His Servant needs”. So what does brother doubt? Allah is Most Just, Brother. He will repay every good by multiplying it. No need to worry. Yes, Brother?”

He finished talking. Along with that, he revealed his smile full of sincerity. Full of understanding. Yep. I couldn't deny it. His words woke me up and released me from the bondage of love that seduces faith.

For the first time, I shed tears in front of a woman other than my mother. My tears made me stand up. My tears were wiped with my hands.

“Thanks, Aisyah” My soft speech

“I also thank you, Brother. For your concern, for your concern that makes me feel so comfortable and happy. Because for the first time, I love someone so sincerely.”

“I too, Aisyah. You are my inspiration now. Who gave enlightenment in my life.”

“Thank God for bringing us together, Kak”

Alhamdulillah!.

I'm so relieved. So happy. We talked to each other about a lot of things after that. Sometimes I make him growl. If he is angry, then his behavior is like a child. Ha. ha. So cute. Our conversation wasn't long. Because the Surya wants to return his complaint. Maybe he was tired of seeing us.

I heard the screams of my friends calling my name.

“Come. Quickly there..” cried Aisyah to me so gently and told me to go towards the origin of the sound.

“Iya, Ayesha.. ”

He smiles. He lowered his head to hide his expression. She pushed. But I'm holding him back.

“Before that there's more I want to say”

He calmed down and looked at me.

“I will truly entrust it to God. About how I feel. And I also believe in you, Aisyah”

“I also” He turned his eyes away. Fizzy cheeks. He asked me back

“What's just that?”

“One more”

“?”

“InsyaAllah. I'll ask you after finishing college”

“HOAA.!!” He spontaneously shouted. Then ask me again.

“Isn't it too fast, brother? Moreover, my brother is not necessarily a successful person. Jad—”

“I must succeed. Because my success will be a real proof for you. For this taste. To pay the burden of your longing and pain. I must succeed and fast bind you.” My words are so calm.

It seems that all my doubts have been cleared. I approached. Then put my right hand on top of her head which is covered in hijab. I stroked his head. Then continue my words.

“Then from it. Wait for Me! Expect Me! I certainly could if God allowed”

“Hm..” He nodded.

“My feeling is so calm right now. Peaceful heart. Even if nothing has changed. Now I am ready to begin my journey.

Now, the real life is waiting ahead. Even if it is difficult, I have to keep moving forward. Yep. Keep moving towards my dream. The dream I wanted to make that happen, was to marry Aisyah.