Love Me Because of God

My Keistiqomahan

The heavy rain was covered with strong winds. That night a beautiful baby girl was born. The baby was given the name Azizah which means honorable or noble woman. Azizah is my name.

I come from a well-off family. I'm the only– kid. I have both parents who are intact. They take good care of me. Even very well.

I have a friend named Annisa. He was very attentive to me. He always takes me in kindness. Annisa's kind nature makes her have the principle of loyalty. He always accompanied me when I was sad. Annisa once said “if anyone likes me and wants to be my girlfriend. I want to give him one condition. That requirement was to wait for me until I graduated. And marry me straight away”. That was his promise.

Today is my seventeenth year. And today I wear a hijab for two years. I've been wearing the hijab from first-semester first grade. So I'm used to wearing hijab even though my friend– no one wears hijab except my best friend who always accompany me. I went to school with my best friend at Wijaya Kusuma High School.

I started a new day after I finished my first semester in second grade. In the second semester I had to smile even though the various exams came but I will deal with it.

“hayo..” My best friend surprised me from behind my body.

“eh. My heart is almost dislodged”

“how was the holiday? Where are you?”

“aku to grandma's house. You?” asked back.

“aku at home just accompany my mother selling” honestly annisa replied.

“wah kasian.. engga holiday” candaku.

“engga ap–apa. Vacation at home help parents are more berahala. From holiday borosin duit”. Annisa to me.

“but I have borosin money. I'm going on vacation to Grandma's house for silaturahmi”. I gave annisa an explanation.

“iya. I'm just ko`”

Suddenly a guy approached us. His face is very beautiful. His skin was white, his body was tall, his hindi were sharp.

“hai..” he greets us both.

I was stunned to see his face, his body, and the perfection he had. But there I got the sin. I've been adulterous. The eyes of adultery and the feelings of adultery. I turned my face to my best friend. So that I don't look at him. I saw Annisa's lips were about to move. Looks like he's gonna say something.

“sorry you muslim?” that's what Annisa said to the guy.

I wonder why Annisa said that. The guy greeted us but why did Annisa answer like that.

Then the guy answered

“i'm Muslim just like you. I want to get acquainted with you guys.especially the same this one” (while pointing at me)

I was embarrassed to hear that he wanted to meet me. But suddenly annisa said that makes the atmosphere hot.

“a Muslim should know how to say hello. Last time you said hello with the word ‘hai’. What is the right greeting for a Muslim?”. Kata–kata annisa's starting to heat up

I'm sorry to hear that Annisa's so cynical about that guy.

“annisa you what – what the heck. Maybe he forgot”. Kubela that guy.

“time to say hello just forgot”. Annisa answered with cetus.

“emm. I forgot to say hello because I saw two very beautiful angels” the guy apologized to us by thrusting his hand.

“sorry not mahram..” I told you.

“that's zinah. To–till salam was forgotten”. Annisa's words made things even hotter.

“already! let's go to class, Azizah”. annisa left me while taking me to class.

The guy said “oh so your name is Azizah?”

“iya..” with a downcast face I said it.

“myname Shedy. I'm a new kid and now I'm third-grade”

“means different a year with me. I'm second grade and I'm your sister”

It was my brief acquaintance with him that made me always remember him. I am confused by my feelings. I think I'm starting to fall in love with him.

The wind blew slowly and the quiet atmosphere made me want to sleep. I sat in a chair near the basketball court waiting for my best friend. I bowed because of the hot sun. I saw a shadow of a shoe.

“kok no shoes?” wonder

“assalamu’alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu” sound greetings

And I raised my head up. It was Shedy. Shedy came over to me and sat next to me.

“wa alaikum salam warahmatullahi wabarakatu” I deswab his greetings.

“you're alone?. Where's your friend who always advises me?” tanyakanya.

“iya I'm alone.. huss. Engga good.” I nasehati him.

“lagian he talks the same who wants to know Jutek really. That was not to” Shedy commented on Annisa's attitude this morning.

“ekhm... so more sure nih”.

Annisa's voice came from behind the seat. We looked it was Annisa.

“sorry whose name are you?” Annisa asked Shedy.

“mm..”. Shedy was so nervous.

“Shedy nis” I answer Annisa's question.

“gini yes Shedy. Maybe this morning you felt like I was so jutek. But you have to understand. I was like that. You're wrong and I have to advise you. If you're right I won't advise you”. Annisa gave an explanation.

“alah Sheedy, Annisa. Maybe you misunderstood. Already this problem should not be enlarged–exaggerated”. Kunasehati both of them.

“Azizah we go home yuk” Annisa attract me.

We both came home in my car which was ready to pick me up.

“not usually Annisa stays in car” murmured me in heart.

Suddenly he said –aku do not want if you are close to him“.

“nearest to who?” I'm surprised Annisa went straight to the point talking. Usually no.

“sama Shedy” briefly replied.

“why? We should be happy to make new friends”

“i've guessed you will definitely defend her” Annisa's answer is very unpleasant.

“then what did you mean earlier in school?. You said ‘so more sure nih’. What does that mean?”

“I'm sure the guy likes you. I don't think that guy's good. The first time we met, I saw his attitude. You must Istiqomah Azizah”.

“I'm getting more and more engaged with your word–katau. I must be Istiqomah Annisa. Don't you assume my words that don't want to date are a lie”.

“I keep your promise Zah”

“iya... Nis”

I was pensive to think of the word– Annisa said. Why did Annisa say that. I know Nis, you're very considerate of me but your attention makes me go awry. Maybe on the other side of my heart I was really comfortable when I was close to him.

Her name is sitting on the school garden chair. Makes me linger–long sitting in that chair. I looked at the tree–tree and heard the bird–bird chirping.

“Azizah what are you doing?” someone called.

“you... surprised me just” I was surprised to see Shedy.

“what are you doing?” ask again.

“i'm hearing bird” chirp

“can you hear? I thought you couldn't hear the candle”.

“ih you. You think I'm deaf what”

I was still thinking about Annisa. If he sees me, he may be healthy again.

“why are you silent Azizah?” ask Shedy.

“I think of Annisa. Annisa advised me yesterday not to be close to you” I told her about.

“annisa is your best friend. Just trust the same Annisa” Shedy defended Annisa.

“iya, but I also believe in you”

“Azizah..” call Shedy.

Suddenly the atmosphere became quiet and only the voices of the two of us were heard.

“iya Shed?” my heart started to shake.

“sorry before. The atmosphere is less romantic. Azizah actually from the beginning I liked you. You... would you like to be.. My girlfriend?”

I don't understand why shedy said that so soon. I have to how. I like him too but Annisa forbids me from getting close to her. Then what should I do?.

I met Annisa who was in the canteen. Annisa usually sells in the cafeteria at recess. I saw him but I wasn't ready to tell you about Shedy expressing his heart to me.

Suddenly annisa called me. Maybe he saw me looking at him from afar.

“Azizah..” call Annisa.

“ya Nis..” I approached him.

“tadi morning before entering school I was looking for you. I wanted to tell you about the hijab I saw at the store near our school. Turns out nice–good her hijab Zah”

“oh well..?” I also hesitate– hesitates to answer his words–.

“you why the hell Zah?. From earlier your face no smile” ledek Annisa.

“Nis I want to talk to you. Important!”

“important well.. yaudah yuk us to taman” Annisa pull my hand.

I said– said so that Annisa would not be angry with me and I gave myself. Azizah you must be brave, angry or not angry with Annisa later. The most important thing is I don't cover up from him.

“Nis.so gini. A few minutes ago. I'm pensive about Nis here, this chair. I thought of your word–but suddenly someone came up to me and revealed his heart to me. Because I was confused as to what to answer. I left him. And that guy named... mmm... She. dy nis”. Finally finished my explanation.

I saw Annisa surprised but after that her face became relaxed. So what's the sign?

“Nis are you mad at me?”. That's the question I've been asking from here.

“no.. I'm not mad at you Zah. The one that should be angry is your own heart”. Annisa gave the word– a word I don't understand.

“you mean nis?”

“you who promise istiqomah Zah, and it is your heart that promises. Promise not to date. That's your promise” annisa makes it clear.

“iya Nis.. but I like her Nis..” I am not strong and I cry.

“yasalah... follow your heart. Which is the most true”. Annisa handed the decision to me.

I leaned against a tree. I'm confused what to do. But Annisa says I have to follow my own heart. Ok. I will follow my own heart.

I went to school to see Shedy. Shedy is in his class. Kuhampiri him.

“Shed..” I call him.

“yes.. uh Azizah. What's up Zah?”

“I want to talk to you”

“mau by what?”

I immediately expressed my intentions to Shedy.

“Shedy I accept you as my girlfriend”

“hah... Which is really Zah?” looks like a happy face.

“iya.. Annisa says, I must follow my own heart. Because I like you, so I accept you as my girlfriend”

I started dating Shedy. Shedy loves me and cares for me. I want Shedy to be my boyfriend and husband. Because Shedy was so good to me.

I've been dating Shedy for two weeks. But a week ago I felt weird about him. He always held my hand when we were alone. I know it's not okay, but I don't know what's going through inside me that I just keep quiet when I hold my hand by it. And lately Shedy has been angry with me if I'm late to see him.

After the break I took the time to meet Shedy. I'm looking for him in his class. Shedy was daydreaming in his class. Don't know what he's up to.

“Shedy..” I call him.

“Zah.... You have a break?”

“already earlier... Then you? Why stay silent in class?” asked back.

“i am waiting for you. I know for a fact you'll be looking for me”

“iya... You were daydreaming what?”

“tadi... I daydreamed an angel of mine looks graceful when flicking her hair in front of me”

I was silent for a moment. I confused sift through his words–. What does that mean?.

“I don't understand Shed..”

“I want to see you don't wear the hijab Zah..for sure you will look beautiful”. Shedy took me into the bad.

“no…! I don't want to. I promised I wouldn't open it to anyone but my husband”.

I'm so angry with Shedy. He hurt my heart so much. Why did he talk to me like that? Does he not love me anymore?.

So hurt was hearing his words. I also could not resist crying. Then I left Shedy.

As always a comfortable place is a school garden chair. I went to the school park. I sat in that chair. Before I sat down, I saw no one. But there was someone beside me.

“why are you nagging Zah?” he asked me.

I turned to him “Annisa..” .Turns out it was my best friend.

“you've been here from Nis?”

“iya. That's why I came here. Because this place is your favorite place in school”.

“Annisa. I've forgotten you” I apologize to him. I am guilty of forgetting it.

“not okay–apa. But ever since you dated Shedy, we've lost Zah's communication. I don't know why”.

I was silent at his words–. I'm wrong, I prefer someone I just know to my best friend.

“Nis... I have the same problem Shedy nis”.

“kukira as long as you are dating her. you will not get into trouble” Annisa quipped.

“what the hell are you Nis. Don't insinuate me like that” tegorku to Annisa.

“what's your problem Zah? What makes you cry? Tell me about”.

I told Annisa everything that had happened during my relationship with Shedy.

“a week ago, he already stained me Nis. But I kept quiet, Nis. I was like being sedated by him. And earlier, I met him in his class. It turns out that he was daydreaming... I asked ‘he was daydreaming what’ and he replied ‘he was daydreaming an angel hers flicked her hair”.

I stopped telling Annisa. I couldn't keep going but Annisa told me to keep going.

“azizah. I don't understand, why did Shedy say that?”

“dia wants me to remove my hijab Nis..”.

“apa?” Annisa was shocked after hearing my words.

I cried in Annisa's arms. I know Annisa must be disappointed in me. Annisa also advised me to decide on Shedy who is not sane.

I went to Shedy in his class. I've really– sure I want to make it. I see shedy reading a book. I don't know what he's reading. I immediately spoke to the core of the matter.

“Shed..” I call him.

But suddenly someone called Shedy softly.

“sayang.. Shedy.”.

I looked towards that voice. Turns out a woman. Who is that woman?. I asked– wondered in my heart.

I asked the woman. “you ready Shedy? Ko’ calls ‘sayang’ to Shedy?”

“Shedy my girlfriend.” honestly the woman answered him.

I was surprised to hear the words– the woman said. I'm so upset with Shedy.

No other word–other word than the word “Shed... we broke up..”. I turned back to leave it.

Shedy pulled my hand. And he said “don't Azizah.

“you have already stained me, held my hand, told me to take off the hijab”

Shedy took off her pull and fell silent. It seems Shedy is aware of his mistake.

“Shed. But I can't continue this relationship. I realize, I've forgotten my best friend for a guy”.

From today, this hour, this minute, and this second. I officially started my day with the promise of not dating. And thank you to my friend who can still forgive your friend.

‘My friend... When I am sad you are beside me but when I am happy I leave you. My friend forgive me’