I'm Tired, Love Me

Surprise

Seven months later…..

I woke up and grabbed my phone from the nightstand and saw the clock from my phone, it was still at 03:00 but I woke up because I suddenly felt my stomach hurt so much,I tried to calm down by taking a deep breath and then throwing it out through my mouth, not long after that the pain in my stomach was no longer felt.

I got out of bed and walked to the bathroom, because my womb was approaching the birth day and because my womb was already large then I more often felt like urinating. After I finished urinating and when I wanted to flush it how surprised I was that there were blood spots in the water, I thought for a moment is it time for me to give birth? Or there is another possibility.

I rushed towards the bed and woke Bagas up,

“yank woke up, there was blood spotting when I p*p*s yank” I woke Bagas in panic,

Bagas who is still half sleepy jumped in shock “ha?whahuh? Is anyone hurt?” Tanya Bagas rushed to take a sitting position and tried to caress my stomach,

”it looks like I want to give birth to yank” I replied while hissing a little because the pain was starting to feel back,

“given? How now?” Bagas asked in confusion and immediately rushed to his feet,

“yank try to contact the doctor Manda first time celebrate this symptom first, what is a false contraction or indeed must immediately go to the hospital yank” replied I explained to Bagas to contact the doctor Manda, my obstetrician.

After successfully contacting Manda's doctor and getting an explanation Bagas rushed to change clothes and take our baby gear bag that I had previously prepared, just in case if the sudden incident I had to give birth like this. “Yank said Manda doctor we have to go to the hospital so it is clearer how many” said Bagas explained,

“Yes I changed my clothes first yank” replied me as I walked to the wardrobe and changed my clothes.

At 04:00 we arrived at the Mother and Child Hospital, Bagas got out of the car and headed for Customer Service and explained my situation, while I was still waiting in the car because my stomach pain came back.

Ten minutes later Bagas came with two sisters and took a wheelchair,

Bagas open my car door “yank still hurts huh?” Tanya Bagas while caressing my stomach “yuk down first yank, have been awaited nun it” said Bagas continue “or want me to just carry?” Ask Bagas,

“No need to yank me in a wheelchair, let you gk tired” replied me.

I was pushed into the room and started at the blood pressure check and the others, and the sisters started to check how many openings are currently, and it turns out I've had three openings, with the pain getting worse,and blood started to come out. While Bagas is taking care of the administration for my birthing needs.

After finishing taking care of the administration of Bagas followed me into the room, looking at me who groaned in pain Bagas started to get anxious and asked the nurse who examined me,

“Suster my wife is not pa pa this?” Ask Bagas Worry

“gak pa pa pak, this is natural when opening more and more then the pain will be more intense pak” replied the nurse explained

“how much longer ya sus until delivery?” Ask Bagas

“cannot be ascertained sir, depending on whether or not the opening increase is”

“Good sus”

“well sir, excuse me first then, if you need something can just press this button pak” replied the nurse while showing on the button yng shaped like a small microphone

“Iya sus”

Bagas who accompanied me from the beginning did not leave me, while my parents and Bagas waited in the waiting room.

I couldn't bear the pain of this contraction, the one who accompanied me somehow I used to wear it, the clothes I pulled because I was venting my pain.

The doctor entered the maternity ward and said,

“Hallo mbak is ready ta?” Ask the doctor

“Iya doctor, the doctor's prescription is not strong pain” said I was half angry

“Yuk calculated until three, take a breath continue to exhale while straining yes mbak” said the doctor explained

“Huuf...huuf..huuf....” I can only breathe through my mouth to reduce my pain.

“ONE... Two….. Three….. Take a deep breath and keep pushing mbak” the doctor gave me a cue and I tried to follow, even though it did not work right away

“Let's go one more time, it's already at the end of his son's head” the doctor told me

“One..Two..Three..Take a breath exhale while straining mbak” the doctor returns to give a cue

“Hoooeeekkkk Hoooooeekkk” finally our baby voice is heard

But a minute later I began to become unconscious, perhaps because of the anesthetic given when the doctor would sew a tear through the birth canal, or because I was too tired during the contraction process to give birth, or because I was too tired,that made me unconscious.

Two hours after giving birth I just realized and was already in my hospital room. I spread my gaze through the room I was in right now, I saw Bagas asleep on the long sofa and there was a baby box next to my current bed, how happy I am when I look at my son's face, handsome like his papa, white with jet black and dense hair.

Giovano Samudra is the name of our son, the name of my gift and agreement and Bagas.

Vano gave me a color in my life, making me always have a reason to smile and be happy.

***

After coming home after three days in the hospital, I was very excited to take care of Vano. I don't want anyone to help me take care of Vano even though Bagas has offered me several times to help the assistant just to take care of Vano, but I immediately refused, he said,because I want to enjoy my time with Vano before Vano grows up.

I wash Vano's clothes, bathe, change diapers, all I do alone. It's just that right now there is a shooter who helps clean the house, but to cook still I do it myself, because Bagas does not want to eat if not my cooking.

Being a mother made me feel how to love even though I had never met. Makes me a more unselfish person, putting all my desires aside for Vano's sake. Yes, being a mother makes me a much better person.

But…..

I was wrong, too focused on Vano made me slightly put my appearance aside, set aside my attention for Bagas, made my appearance look shabby, maybe even uncomfortable to look at Bagas because I only use negligee all day at home, making my appearance look shabby,because I think it's my most comfortable outfit.

Seriate……