Pursuing the Details of His Love Tasbih

Chapter 30 - The Beginning of the True Journey

When it was late afternoon, Ameer returned to fill the study after being replaced by other teachers. This time Ameer was more excited than usual because she knew Meizia was coming, although until this moment the woman did not show her nose.

Meizia, on the other hand, stood outside the musholla alone. The girl was dressed covered from top to bottom. As Ameer suggested.

He was also very eager to enter, but he was embarrassed and did not know what to do in there. He had thought he would go home, but he could not because Meizia was determined to improve.

Suddenly, two new women arrived and one of the women greeted Meizia. "Why not go in?" tanyakanya.

Meizia was confused as to what to answer, she could only stare at the two beautiful women in front of her. Meizia's forehead was wrinkled, it felt like she was no stranger to any of them. "Meizia, why shut up?"

"I'm sorry" said Meizia. Now that she remembers who the girl is, she was at Ameer's house when Ameer took Meizia to her house.

"Why apologize? Come on in," Hana chuckled even as she directly pulled Meizia's hand in.

Hana brought Meizia to sit in the corner because only the place was empty, the study that was held routinely was never empty of pilgrims so far.

"What's wrong with your face?" hana asked who looked at Meizia's face a little pale.

"What's your name?" meizia asked who made Hana's forehead wrinkle deeply, but a second later she chuckled.

"You know Ameer, Sister Shafa and Ms Marwah, but you don't know me?" ask Hana. "And I was Ameer, too" added Hana.

"Oh, sorry," said Meizia sincerely who again made Hana laugh.

"You're too serious, Meizia," Hana said.

The small chat of the two women apparently attracted the attention of some women who were near them, including Ummi Nayla and also her mother Hana.

"If you're chatting don't be here, out there," said Ummi Nayla, who immediately made Meizia look down inside again, while Hana just threw a thin smile at her aunt.

The atmosphere was calm again, now Ameer began to open the study as usual and everyone listened carefully, Meizia was no exception.

"Where are your friends?" TibawHana whispered to Meizia, of course making the woman spontaneously immediately glance at Ummi Nayla because she was afraid to return

"Not coming" Meizia replied in a whisper.

"Why?" Hana asked again that made Meizia grimace immediately, she thought Hana was a graceful, meek girl who would continue to look down and not talk much. But it seems that Meizia's perception is wrong.

"I don't know" Meizia replied in a whisper.

"Are you not asking why they didn't come?" Meizia is back grimacing.

"Already, I—"

"This is not a place for conversation!" Ummi Nayla cuts Meizia's answer. "You're grown-ups, can't you just shut up and listen to your teacher speak up ahead?"

"Hehe, yes, Auntie," replied Hana again throwing her faint smile. Meizia was once again only able to bow.

"Particularly you, Meizia!" exclaim Ummi Nayla with a low but firm voice. "It's your first time to study, so it's better if you're listening and not busy yourself."

"B-well," Meizia replied a little nervously. "Next time you come early to sit in front, who knows that you focus on listening instead of talking."

"I-yes" said Meizia.

Now the two women are back to silence and listen to the contents of the study, which Ameer explained is currently the prayer chapter.

Meizia listened carefully and recalled how many times she prayed? She even forgot when she last prayed, but Meizia used to pray in school. It was only because of following his friend who prayed.

Meizia seemed confused as to what to answer, she had no mukena and she did not know what to pray. "I'm .. I'll pray at home" Meizia replied.

"The prayer is better than praying alone" Hana said with a smile. "Udah, pray here."

"I don't have a mukena" Meizia said at last.

"Here a lot, you just wear whatever," concluded Hana while pulling Meizia into a closet containing mucena. "Well, this is the place of the Mukena and that is the place of the Qur'an." Hana pointed to the other closet. "You can wear things here."

Meizia could only nod slowly.

From a distance, Ameer smiled as she saw Hana holding Meizia's hand and the girl had been talking ever since. Ameer really hopes Meizia will soon be able to blend in with them all and get used to her current life.

Soon it is entering the time of Maghrib, then all who want to perform prayer congregation there immediately take ablution immediately.

Hana was still holding Meizia, as if the woman was her little sister who was afraid of missing in the crowd.

"Udah, come in yuk!" take Hana when she feels that inside is not full.

Meizia only obeyed as Hana dragged her inside. "Wudhu here, yes." Hana said while putting Meizia by her side.

As Meizia was about to ablaze, she folded her sleeves up to her elbows and it turned out that the incision marks on her wrist caught the attention of some people who were there.

Those who did not know who Meizia was were of course shocked and started to wonder what happened to the young lady.

"Why arm, Neng?" ask one of the middle-aged women over there.

"It's okay," Meizia replied in a low voice.

"Astagfirullah, Neng, are you trying to kill yourself?" knock on another woman. "That must not be loh, one of the greatest sins besides adultery and idolatry is suicide."

"I'm Khilaf" said Meizia in a slightly trembling voice.

"Why two hands, Neng? The Khilaf is only once, if you do something twice it means the intention and want" chirped another again.

"Great sin, Neng, God is angry with those who precede his destiny."

Their statement certainly made Meizia uncomfortable, even though they were actually very true. However, now that Meizia already knew and realized it was wrong.

Hana who saw Meizia being cornered immediately approached the woman and defended her. "He was wrong, and now he's trying to improve" Hana said. "As a fellow Muslim, would it not be better to encourage one's migration than to bring up the mistakes of the past?"

Getting a reprimand from Hana of course made them all instantly speechless. "Meizia has just walked the right path, she's new to hijarh and all she needs is our support and do'a."

"Sorry, Ning Hana," said one of the women.

"There's no need to apologize" Hana replied with a smile. "But please next time don't bring up the past of others, Meizia is in this place to improve her future."

Both of Meizia's eyes were already glazed over, and before long the tears she tried to endure finally fell as well. Her chest was rumbling but she tried to hold back that feeling, Meizia knew this was bound to happen. Someone will look back at their past and question it.

The Adhan was reverberating, they all rushed to take ablution and the finished ones immediately came out.

"Don't take heart," said Hana comfortingly and Meizia was only able to nod.

As he put his hand under the faucet, tears poured down again and the darkness of the past re-shadowed in his mind. Making the woman's hand tremble even a small sob escaped her lips.

"Can I erase that black trail, Lord? Can someone else not ask her again? Or is this the beginning of my real journey?"