I'm a Widow But a Virgin

Mating Adalah...Uh...

"Why are you so sure of Mira Mas?" Ask Almira.

"Because you are the answer of my istikharah"

Almira looked at Reihan.

"When istikharah?"

"Before I knew you"

"meaning?"

"At that time Mas urged Ummi and Aby to get married soon, but Mas did not have a candidate, so Ummi and Aby intend to match Mas, there are some photos that they gave to Mas,finally to convince Mas, Mas then pray istikharah, and you know Mas dreamed you up to 3x, Mas confused, even though from the photo there is no one like you.

Finally Mas could not be sure of the match, Mas finally asked Aby and Ummi for more time"

"Then how else?"

"Then a few months later there was a lecturer who was similar to the woman in Mas's dream, namely Alisha your sister, but Mas was not sure also because in the dream Mas called you Humairah, not Alisha.

When we cross paths at the restaurant at that time, Mas was so surprised when he saw you, especially when he found out you were his sister Alisha, at that time Mas also dreamed of you continuing in our first meeting, he said,Mas was surprised back when he saw the name tag in your uniform, Alisha Humaira, Mas became more and more sure it was you"

Almira tearfully hears Reihan's explanation.Almira is actually also convinced that Reihan will guide her well, but Almira also thinks of her family whether to agree.

"Mas, Mira has not graduated, Mira also still wants to reach the ideals of Mira, Mira wants to be good at cooking and open a Mas cake shop"

"Mas will wait for you to pass Yes Humairah, Mas's ideals problem will support you"

"Would it be okay if later Almira doubles as a wife, as a cake maker and as a housewife?"

"It's okay, is not the woman multi-role, why must you choose one, the most important thing is that Mira does not forget to be a good wife, which is getting ridho from Mas"

Almira nodded.

"So?"

"So what?"

"Agreed no?"

"By Mama Papa Mas"

Reihan smiled, He felt like he had gotten the green light from Almira.

"Rey, Mira, why are you standing there all the time, what are you talking about?seriously so?" Ummi.

"Humirah I want to talk to Ummi first yah"

Almira nodded, then he walked towards Alisha and Hafiz who were in the middle of his extended family.

Reihan approached Ummi.

"Ummi Reihan wants to talk Mi"

"What's Rey?"

"Ummi disguises Almira for Rey"

Ummi patted Reihan's arm.

"You know, applying is not that easy, we're not here to bring anything, you don't see the application procession like that there's a lot of things to prepare"

"But Mi, Reihan also wants to get married," Rengek Reihan.

Ummi smiles.

"Come on Mi,please, help Reihan"

"Eh Rey, why are you pulling your Ummi hand" asked Aby who suddenly approached them.

"It's lhoo By,Reihan mating" Ledek Ummi.

"Lhoo, who's their proposal, why are you getting married?" Ledek is also Aby.

"Oh you guys, it's not that it helps Reihan even mocked Reihan." Reihan.

"Sit down Aby's son, listen to Aby,

Every woman certainly craves a husband who gives her peace and happiness in family life.

Islam gives freedom to every woman to determine her future husband without coercion by sticking to the teachings of religion.

Islam teaches to be careful in determining the companion of life because family life is not only for one or two years but intended for a long time until the end of life and in the future.

Whether you have prepared provisions for the future, marriage is not a Reihan race.Wedding is a long journey, and we must have provisions, Almira or the Wijaya family must crave a good daughter-in-law, who is not careless, he said,because they're gonna let go of her daughter"

"Then what supplies should Reihan prepare Aby"

"Listen to Aby, if you meet the criteria that Aby says, then Aby will allow you to apply for Almira"

Reihan nodded, Aby then mentioned some provisions to be a priest who deserves a wife, or be a dream husband.

Almira is a Muslim woman It is clear that a Muslim woman should choose a future husband based on her religion, as the following word of Allah, says,

وَلَا تَنكِحُوا الْمُشْرِكَاتِ حَتَّىٰ يُؤْمِنَّ

“Do not marry a polytheist to a woman before they believe ..” (QS. al-Baqarah :221).

Marriage to a polytheist man is not in the riddhoi of God and is not religiously legal, a lifetime will be in adultery and not accepted his deeds. therefore, choose a man who is Muslim so that later he can lead to heaven.

Sholeh.

Sholeh means obedient in religion, a man who is sholeh is a good behavior and his speech which is a characteristic male sholeh according to Islam, obeying the commandments of Allah and avoiding all His prohibitions.

Diligent Worship.

إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِندَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ

“... verily the noblest among you by Allah is the most pious. Verily, Allah is All-Knowing, All-More.”. (QS. al-Hujuraat :13).

It does not matter that a prospective husband is less than a little from the side of the world but more from the side of his religion because the prospective husband diligently worship has a noble place in the eyes of God and can later teach charity to the wife and his son's son.

“Your kindest groom is the best to his wife”. (SN Turmudzi).

A good husband candidate is one who can take care of himself for someone who becomes his wife later, always maintain his attitude and views because he understands God is watching wherever he is.

Characteristics of a loyal man is that he is able to keep his gaze, make friends naturally with the opposite sex, and not excessive in admiring or telling other women to his wife later.

Have a Better Understanding of Religion.

Household is built on the basis of religious knowledge, make sure the husband has the knowledge of Islam and various sharia in his. Men who are religious savvy will certainly be able to act according to Islamic rules in their daily lives.

The minimum is that he has a religious understanding that is equivalent to his woman because he is the one who will become the leader in the family.

Duties To Parents.

The Prophet said: “Bless to your parents, surely your children will be devoted to you”. (HR Ibn Umar RA).

Being devoted to both parents is one of the entrance of heaven, if you have a prospective husband who respects and speaks soft words to both parents, so that's how he will behave to his wife and children.

It was a reflection of how he treated his family.The proposition of filial filial filial to parents as a reinforcement that how important respect them.

Smart to Take Care of Yourself.

A good husband candidate is able to protect himself from evil deeds. Not utilizing the advantages possessed for bad.

For example, if there is a man who has advantages in terms of fortune, science, or physical appearance where he has the opportunity to do maksiat with it.

Such as scattering scattering money for something that is not useful, utilizing science to deceive others, or utilizing his handsome face to approach girls for sheer pleasure.

A good man will keep himself for the sake of his future wife. Men who stay away from the motions will certainly teach their families not to do prostitution anyway. A man like this will keep away from the bad and get closer to the good.

Capable

As the word of the Prophet follows: “O young man, whoever of you is married, then he should marry, but whoever is not able should fast because fasting restrains lust”. (HR Ahmad Bukhari and Muslim).

Able to be intended is to try to provide shelter, necessities of life such as daily food and clothing to cover the aurat.

A good husband candidate according to Islam will always try to give the best for his wife and family and make marriage as a way of worship to God.

Be Responsible.

Responsibility relates to his future role as the head of the family who has the obligation to give a living of inner birth and educate his wife and family.

The man with this character always wants progress and thinks far ahead, he is a figure who has a clear purpose will be taken where his family is.

Responsibility in this case is not only a mere financial problem, but also gives affection and leads his family into a better human being.

For example, working really and giving knowledge to his wife so that his wife also becomes a smarter woman. A responsible man is able to hold the commitment according to the marriage promise he said.

Soulful Leader.

A man is destined by God to be the head of the family with his power to protect his wife and children in order to be saved in the world and in the hereafter. A man who is a leader will be appreciated and respected by his family.

The spirit of leadership can be seen from his daily life, how he relates to others, his passion in work, how he makes decisions, and not easily give up in the face of life's challenges.

Be Fair

A fair attitude will make the family harmonious, he will not insult his family because he understands that he will be held accountable in the future.

Fair is meant here is to give the appropriate portion in terms of any birth and inner living, affection, division of duties, and time.

No matter how busy a man may be if he has a just nature, he will still make time for his beloved wife and children because he understands family also requires presence, communication, and affection, not just money. A man must be able to do justice according to the following word of God,

وَأَقْسِطُوا ۖ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُقْسِطِينَ

“... and be fair, verily Allah loves those who act just”. (QS. al-Hujarat: 9)

Act and Speak Soft Weak Words.

In the book of shahihnya no 2594 from Aisha the Prophet said: “Really, everything decorated with tenderness will look beautiful”.

Often found in family life the existence of KDRT (violence in the household) by the husband to his wife.

Ranging from violence in the form of words to physical even eliminate lives. It happened because of his poor religious knowledge and the habit of acting violently.

A good husband candidate is the one who is gentle and treats women well, appreciates women by not touching them before becoming a muhrim and speaks polite words, his sentences always contain the word kindness or advice, not a sentence of praise that only leads to lust.

Be careful of men who are rude even before you become his muhrim, it could be like his character in domestic life later.

Desire to Have Heredity and Fertile

“And seek what God has ordained for you, son”. (QS. al-Baqarah :187).

One of the purposes of marriage is to have children, if a man is married only because of sheer lust and is not willing to have offspring on the grounds of not wanting to add burden etc then he is not a good husband candidate according to Islam.

The family will become more colorful with the presence of children, between husband and wife must work together to be able to have children who are sholeh and sholehah so that later can pray for both parents.

Give Trust

Household is the life of two people in which there are so many interactions in togetherness. It takes trust in each other so that all affairs run comfortably.

A good husband candidate is one who can give confidence to his wife, including confidence in taking care of finances and taking care of the house and children. A man who does not believe in his wife will certainly create an attitude that is not open so there is no closeness between the two.

Not Foolish (loving alms)

The Word of God in Al-Hadid verse 18:

إِنَّ الْمُصَّدِّقِينَ وَالْمُصَّدِّقَاتِ وَأَقْرَضُوا اللَّهَ قَرْضًا حَسَنًا يُضَاعَفُ لَهُمْ وَلَهُمْ أَجْرٌ كَرِيمٌ

“Verily those who give alms to both men and women and lend to Allah with good loans, will be multiplied (reply) to them; and they will have a glorious reward.” 

Miser has a broad meaning, in everyday life can be seen for example a man who has a career or more fortune but let both parents live in distress, the man is not worthy of being a husband.

Aby explained at length, Reihan smiled.

"Why smile?" Ask Ummi.

"All the criteria are already in Reihan, have just married Ummi" Reihan said confidently.

"Truly yes this is a child mating"