TRAPPED IN FORBIDDEN DESIRES

83. Round up Determination

Papa, mama and Dios could only stare at my departure from the main door of Dios' house. I was forced to go alone with Marta, because Dios forbade me to take my father and mother with me. I had already made up my mind to part ways for a while from Dios, and return to the city of J.

It was the first time I felt it when I just arrived at my parents' second home. For some reason, instead of feeling happy, I felt a tightness in my chest.

"Basic Dios jerk! is this as loving as she is? it's so far away, I'm even made to fret. Fucking dios! when did it die, people. Hicks...."

I'm venting all my annoyance. I don't know who I'm really upset with right now. I was far from the man who made my life turn upside down. And my misfortune grew, when suddenly Marta was hit by a high thug. I became a club, and went to take Marta to the hospital.

I paced back and forth in front of the children's room, to find out the diagnosis of Marta's disease. At a time like this, I desperately needed the presence of Dios beside me.

"I have to how is this? should I call Dios? if anything happened to Marta, and I didn't tell her, she would be furious,"

I'm really in a dilemma right now. Besides my worry, I also felt the prestige to contact him. But I also don't want to because my pride makes everything so fatal.

I immediately approached the doctor, when the doctor came out of the examination room.

"How's my son doing, Doc? is he okay? there's no serious illness, is there, Doc?"

The doctor smiled his smile when he heard my question.

"Mother's son has a normal fever. The weather has been bad lately, I should suggest that the mother's child should be on the operating system, let the heat go down quickly."

"So his body temperature has reached 40 degrees Celsius" continued the doctor.

"Just do your best, Doc. I just follow what the doctor says" said I worried.

"Then please go to the registration section yes ma'am," said the doctor.

"Nice doc." My answer.

I immediately took care of my son's administration and told papa about Marta.

"So how's pa? do you think I should tell Dios about Marta?" ask me papa.

"of course. Even if you are angry with him, but about Marta there is no other compromise. Marta is her son, she deserves to know what happened to her son" he said.

"Then let papa tell him. I'm still lazy to talk to him," I said.

I heard Dad breathing heavily. After that conversation I thought it was enough, I ended it. My body is really tired right now. Not only physically tired, my mind also feels tired.

I looked at Marta who was lying weakly with an infusion on her back. Seeing her condition like that, I really feel unbearable. And I thought for a moment that it was an honest reaction from a little boy who didn't want his parents to fight and separate.

"I'm sorry, son. Brother healed quickly huh? later if it is healed, my mother will take my brother for a walk to the mall. We bought new clothes, new shoes, new hats, and brother's favorite snack,"

I asked Marta to talk, as if she was listening to me right now.

Drakes

Drakes

Drakes

Time showed at 4pm, when I heard footsteps approaching Marta's place on the door.

Chequelek

The door handle is pressed from the outside. I turned to the origin of the voice, and my eyes immediately met Dios' eyes. I could see the look of anxiety on his face. The stern look I saw when Sekar was dying in the hospital.

"Dear,"

The first thing Dios did, the man gave me a warm hug. And I don't know why my crying broke at that moment. I beat Dios in the chest while sobbing.

"It's all because of you. Martha is sick because of you. Hiks.." I don't know what my mouth said. I even threw the blame on Dios, as Marta lay helpless.

"Yes, it's all my fault. Please make me as happy as you. I am a useless husband and father. I'm sorry.I'm sorry, baby,"

*****

Blaammm

My eyes opened for a moment. I felt my head throb a little. My forehead, because my head feels so heavy. But when I remembered about Marta, I immediately tried to get up. But my steps came to a halt, when Dios suddenly entered the room where I was lying.

Ah.yeah, I just remembered. When I was unconscious last time, there was Dios who came to the hospital. I shouldn't have to worry too much anymore, because Dios is Marta's father. He will take good care of Marta.

"Honey. Don't move yet, right? your body is still very weak, you have to rest a lot" Dios said.

"How's Marta doing?" I didn't care about Dios's attention, I immediately turned the conversation to Marta who I was worried about.

"The situation is starting to improve. His body temperature had also dropped to 38 degrees Celsius." Answer Dios.

I could breathe a sigh of relief when I heard Dios say.

"So I also wiped Marta's body with warm water. But I was forced to give formula milk to Marta, because she was crying. He also refused to be given ASi's companion food" continued Dios.

"I don't want my son to be formula fed. I was determined to give him ASI for two years," I was about to step outside the room, but Dios suddenly blocked my hand.

"Your condition is no longer possible to provide ASI for Marta," said Diis.

"Loh why? I am not sick, I am healthy. Maybe I fainted because I was exhausted. Tired physically and tired of heart" I said.

Instead of being angry at my innuendo, Dios returned with a smile. And I don't know why I hate it and I'm sick of seeing that smile.

Dios took my hand, but I brushed it off. But Dios did not give up. Twice he took my hand, twice I brushed it off. It was only the third time, that I allowed him to do what he wanted. Dios grabbed both of my hands, and kissed them affectionately.

"You're healthy and you're exhausted. But she here doesn't allow you to breastfeed anymore" Dios said as she groped my stomach.

I frowned, because I did not understand Dios' words.

"What do you mean?" manya curious.

"You are pregnant now, baby. The doctor advised us to consult with the obstetrician, to make sure everything." Answer Dios.

Deg

The heart seems to stop beating. Of course I was surprised, and so attributed all the events to my pregnancy. My emotions were unstable, my hatred for Dios, and it was so easy to cry.

"A-I'm pregnant?" ask again.

"Emm.we'll have another child. Are you happy?" ask Dios.

I stared at Dios' radiant face. I know Dios is very happy with the news. While me? I was confused as to what to react to. When I remember the problem, it feels like my current pregnancy came at an inappropriate time. But I remember very well, Dios did tell me to take off my contraceptives, because she wanted to have a lot of offspring with me.

"Honey. Why even daydream? you still don't believe it? soon we will consult a gynecologist to make sure everything. You don't have to worry, this time I will always be with you until our child is born" said Dios.

I looked back at Dios's face. I don't know why I saw something different about that guy. He was so soft and attentive.

"Are you going to be like this until we get old?" ask ridiculous.

"I am also old now. Forgive my mistakes, huh yank? I'm aware of my mistake. But I swear to God, I just want to return the favor to Sekar who helped me when I was hungry for no job,"

"If it wasn't for her help, maybe you and I would never have come together like this. I consider what happened between us to be a test of our own love. That way we can forge ourselves into a more mature and responsible figure with what we have decided," continued Dios.

"I'm sorry for making you worried and scared. I am just an ordinary man, who has not escaped sin and lack. But I want to improve myself to be a better person. Who can care for you, and who definitely doesn't scare you anymore,"

"Hiks...."

I ran into Dios' hug. Although actually the content of his words was very ordinary, but somehow enough to make me relieved and satisfied. Dios hugged me very warmly, and that's what I need lately. After my tears subsided, Dios immediately took me to consult with the obstetrician.