I'm Not a Shit Carrier

Speak both

Forgive Alisa Hen.. Alisa didn't mean to hurt your feelings.. Alisa doesn't know if that night, Alisa was lured by her.

Alisa knows if you've liked me for a long time, but I don't. Because my feeling of daydreaming is just a friend no more.

Alisa won't ruin our friendship Hen..

that's why I'm always silent every time you say that I'm your future teacher.

Forgive Alisa Hen. It's a matter of the heart. We never know to whom this heart will be anchored.

So do I.

I hope you get a better soul mate than me.

Alisa sat up when she saw Hendra who was hitting her chest slowly.

Alisa felt guilty for always rejecting Hendra. Not that he did not want to but indeed the heart could not cling to him. It's not a matter of like or dislike. It's about the heart, which doesn't know who it's going to dock with.

Alisa was silent, her eyes were staring at Hendra.

'I have to talk to him and apologize and thank him. May my good intentions be accepted by him Alisa muttered.

Alisa whispers something to Yani, Yani hears her and rushes to write on a piece of paper that Alisa wants to talk to Hendra together with all her friends, so as not to cause slander.

They all agree. After the break they will accompany Alisa behind the school.

****

When the break came, they all rushed to the back of the school except for Alisa. He waited for Hendra to come out, but Hendra did not come out. Be Alisa come to him.

Alisa saw Hendra sitting pensively by the window. His eyes were swollen, like he had just cried. Alisa's chest tightens looking at it. He slowly approached Hendra and was educated next to him.

'' Hen.'' the sap is soft.

Hendra was unmoved, he remained on his daydream.

Alisa took her breath slowly. Then he patted Hendra's shoulder as he called out to her.

'' Hen... This is Alisa.. does Hendra not want to talk to Alisa again??'' said sendu.

Hendra did not turn around, but he answered Alisa's words without seeing her.

'' Why Lis..?? Why are you like this?? Does my struggle all this time mean nothing to you?? Am I not worthy to be with you, Lis..?? Sick Lis... this heartache.it feels like I just want to destroy it! Rather than endure pain like this..!'' he said while beating his chest hard.

'' Don't be like that Hen.. forgive Alisa.. I don't mean to hurt Hendra... but this is outside my power... What can I do Hen... so that you can understand my position??'' abugn.

Hendra threw his breath out.

'' Explain !!''

Alisa looked at Hendra who was also staring at her. Alisa could not see Hendra's eyes. The eyes that used to always sparkle, now turned into sweet and sad. His gaze was sharp like a knife that hit the heart. So hurt. But what is the power if love cannot be forced.

Alisa took a slow breath. Then began to tell Hendra from the first meeting, how the young man named Emil tried to melt his heart and until he gave a test for the young man ended up with himself who was injured due to prolonged misunderstanding.

Lastly when Alisa wants to try to forget the young man, last night on Sunday night she came to propose as well as her fiance as proof that Alisa has been tied up by him.

At first the family refused, but at the end of the day, with the approval of Alisa's uncle, they all agreed that Alisa was proposed to by the young man. So did Alisa's story on Hendra.

Apparently I lost quickly to that young man Lis..

Hendra looked at Alisa inside. He doesn't know what else to talk to Alisa. Because it was too late to fight. He thought, after graduating from his school then he would tell the truth to Alisa, that he wanted to apply for Alisa as well as tie her up as a future wife. But it turns out that destiny says something else.

''What was the name of the young man??''

Alisa gasped at Hendra's question. He looked at Hendra in wonder.

So sick are you Hen. until you really want to know the name of the young man who has proposed to me. pardon Alisa Hendra...

'' What's her name Lis..??'' Hendra asked again to make Alisa aware of her daydream.

'' His name is Milham Syahputra, ''' he said as he lowered his face not daring to look at Hendra, who looked at him deeply.

'' You are happy with her Lis..??'' ask her again.

Alisa nodded ''Yes. I am happy with her..''

Hendra closed his eyes Alright if it has become your decision Lis.may you be happy with her! But. If one day you get hurt and no longer want to be with her, then come to me! I will faithfully wait for you..!!'' said bitter.

Alisa smiled stiffly. How could he have come back to Hendra if he had been with Emil. Ah, Hendra there's just no thinking of her. No one knows what the future will be like. Thought Alisa.

For a moment they were silent, contemplating what had happened to them at this moment. After a long contemplation, Alisa finally spoke again, making Hendra stare at her silently.

'' Hen. forgive Alisa yes.. because Alisa can not repay your love for me! forgive me if I hurt you too much.I'm sorry if I was present in your life unintentionally.I'm sorry I couldn't repay your love.. Hiks!'' Alisa crying.

Hendra. His mouth was locked, unable to speak a word. All that Alisa said was the content of her heart that she wanted to convey to Alisa. But the opposite is true.

Alisa is still crying. In that cry he tried again to speak.

'' Thank you Hen. because you have loved me so deeply. Thank you for always looking out for me even though I care for you. forgive Alisa Hendra.

Hendra was crying, unconsciously they were both crying witnessed by friends Alisa and Hendra.

Hendra wanted to hug Alisa but did not dare. His hand was raised wanting to hug Alisa but he puffed. Afraid that Alisa will be angry with him.

He clenched his hands tightly until his handbook book turned white. Hendra tried to quell the anger in his heart. He repeatedly breathed his breath. All of this did not escape the attention of his best friend.

They knew that Hendra was very ill to accept this ordeal. Before he fought, he lost first. It felt like he had snatched Alisa out of the young man's hands, but he was still sane thinking about Alisa being so happy with the young man.

All of that was very clear when Alisa told her to her best friend.

After some Hendra tried to dampen his anger in his heart, Hendra held Alisa's shoulder and directed Alisa face to face with her.

Hendra tried to smile. A smile that was so painful, as hard as he held it until the grip of his hand on Alisa's shoulder a little hard. Making Alisa surprised and feel sick at the same time.

'' Hen's Pain.'' Alisa moans.

The deg!

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Is there anyone waiting?