Honeyed

Episode.61 (SEASON 2)

My wedding to Mas Fatih will be held tomorrow. Nine o'clock in the morning, and it's three o'clock in the evening I haven't closed my eyes either. Mas Fahmi's face was constantly imagined, memories with Mas Fahmi flashed in my memory. I don't know what the sign of all this is. It feels so sad, I better take the water and do the tahajud prayer. At least, so that my heart and mind are much calmer. The cold of the night, did not stop myself from washing my body parts with ablution water. I did two rakaats praying tahajud. Broke my tears in the dark of the night. Missing Mas Fahmi bursting, so I can not stand it. For some reason, it feels very heavy to be married again to Mas Fatih. Like Mas Fahmi, I'm right next to me right now. And begged me not to marry again.

"O God, you hold my heart. Give a way out of this worry. Don't make Aisyah regret for making a wrong decision".

My prayer was soft in the midst of sobs.

The prayer rugs used for prayer, I fold them neatly. Also with the blessing of Mas Fahmi for me. I got up and put this face and prayer mat in the closet. There was an envelope under the newsprint that became the base for Mas Fahmi's clothes. Either the envelope contains what, obviously. Just this time I saw her, I picked up the already slightly shabby envelope. Then sit back on the floor. My hand opened the envelope. There is no word on the front envelope. I opened the envelope, it turned out to contain two sheets of paper with full handwriting Mas Fahmi.

"Assalamu'alaikum Aisha my wife, my angel.

Forgive me dear Fahmi. I don't know why tonight, I really wanted to write this letter. I woke up and wrote this for you Aisyah. Honey, before she wants to apologize. Perhaps as long as Mas becomes your husband, there are many wrongs and shortcomings that do not deign in your heart dear. My wife, Aisha Fatimatul Salwa. Honey, do you know what it's like to know you have a malignant disease called cancer. It feels like Mas's leg is limping next door, Mas is very afraid to lose you in Mas's life. You've been in a coma for days. While the doctor said to Mas, that your life could not be saved if you do not immediately get a suitable kidney donor for you. I almost feel desperate, dear, because it is very difficult to find a donor for you. Until in the end, Mas tried to talk to the doctor who handled you at that time. He volunteered to be a kidney donor for you. Thank God, after passing many tests. Finally Mas declared fit to divide a portion of the kidney Mas for you. Honestly, it feels so happy that Aisyah is matchless. In fact, I don't even know about this. Because he deliberately hid this from anyone. And Mas sick a few days ago, until unconscious in the car, it was because of one of the effects of the process of donating kidney organs dear. Doctors once said, one time it could be that Mas was unconscious and the body turned very weak. Because the body only has one kidney organ. But Mas remains happy, Mas happy because he can share Mas's life with you my wife. I promised, I will always make you happy next to you.

The test is not enough until there baby, our household is back tested with the presence of your past in the middle of our lives. Aisyah, Mother of your ex-husband, even by directly begging Mas Fahmi, to release yourself to return to her son, Fatih. Honey, Mas told me all about yourself with Fatih first. And it feels so painful. Mas has felt the fall wake up, waiting for you to accept Mas to be your husband. Although to be honest it was very painful Aisyah. But Allah is All-Good, His efforts are not in vain. With patience and sincerity. You finally love me too. It felt so happy at the time.

Not only that dear, the person who has helped Mas's life turned out to be Mother Layla. Mas really do not understand, whether all this has been planned by your ex-husband Mother. Or real without being planned. What is clear, Mother Layla asked Mas to pay Mas's life debt to her, by divorcing yourself and handing you over to return with Fatih your ex-husband. But after Mas Fahmi finally invited to meet Fatih. It turned out that even Fatih did not know about everything that Mother Layla did.

Aisyah, I love you so much. He always prayed, whoever would return to God first, he always asked God, so that he would be united again. But all that, can happen if you do not remarry after Mas died. Mas once read, that the Prophet said "Whichever woman dies her husband, then the woman remarries, then she becomes the wife of her last husband." (Sr Thabrani). If you marry again, after Mas dies. Then you will be gathered with your last husband dear. Not with me anymore. But Mas Fahmi will never force you to remain widowed, if the former Mas dies. Being a widow is the toughest opportunity for a woman. For Mas, the most important thing is, you and the children are happy. That's all, baby. Aisyah, Mas Fahmi loves you very much. I love you because of Allah Aisha. Please take care of yourself and our children. Whenever and wherever, do not let go of remembering God.

In the cold night of Yogyakarta

From the one who loves you, your husband Muhammad Fahmi Al-Farizi*".

My hands were shaking violently, my tears were breaking. I did not expect, Mas Fahmi was the one who had donated his kidney to me. The one who even sacrificed his life to see myself healthy again. Now what am I supposed to do?. If only, Fahmi would still be here. Maybe I hugged him very tightly with a thousand words of thanks to him. But in fact, I could only cry hugging the two sheets of paper that were now wet from my tears.

"O Allah is Fahmi!!. Why is it that Aisha is reading this letter. Why is it only now that Aisyah found this letter Mas. Mas Fahmi!, why did Mas not even shout directly at Aisyah. Hiks... "

I cried alone. It feels really painful. How could I live with another man. The man who gave me life is gone. Mas Fahmi even hoped to be able to regroup with me after death. How could that happen, if I remarry Mas Fatih. What should I do now. My wedding will be in a few hours. How do I convey this to Mom, to the kids, to Mas Fatih.

"Wake up, son! ".

Mother's voice sounded faintly in my ears. I even fell asleep on the floor still hugging a letter from Mas Fahmi. I was very surprised, it was five o'clock more. I haven't even prayed dawn yet. My body immediately rushed to wake up.

" Mom, astaghfirullah. Aisha has not prayed dawn. Aisha pray first Ma'am".

"Yes son".

I walked away from Mom, and then immediately prepared to perform the dawn prayer. Two rakaat morning prayers I have done. Some people have started to get busy, to prepare for my wedding with Mas Fahmi. While I was still very weak after reading a letter from Mas Fahmi. Some people styled me, wore me thin makeup and wore a simple old-fashioned dress. I could just keep quiet and keep daydreaming. How could all this have happened. What should I do now, my heart is broken. Mas Fahmi, I'm sorry Aisyah. Aisyah is very bad at Mas Fahmi.

At nine o'clock, everyone had gathered to do my second marriage contract with Mas Fatih. Mas Fatih had even sat in front of the ruler, ready to process my marriage contract with him. My family in solo no one can come because there is an affair. Be, my marriage guardian used the judge on my Abi's permission. I sit between Mother and Mother. I'm still daydreaming, everybody's happy, except me.

"OK, just go ahead. We're starting the wedding ceremony. Brother Fatih, are you ready?! ".

" It's sir".

"good. Bismil was born Rahmanirrahim, I married and married Aisha Fatimatul Salwa Binti Muhammad Soleh who was represented to me, with you Muhammad Fatih bin Hartono Dwi Cahyo, who was sent to me, with fifteen grams of mating gold and a set of prayer instruments in cash".

" I accept the marriage and marriage of Aisha Fatimatul Salwa bint Muhammad Soleh with a set of prayer tools and gold mating weighing fifteen grams in cash!! ".

" How about Witness?!.

"Wait!!! ".

I screamed, stopping this wedding ceremony. I can't go on with this wedding. Fahmi is my last love. There's nothing else.

" What's up Ayesha?! ".

Mom asked me.

" I'm sorry, I wanted to apologize in particular to Mas Fatih and his family. I can't continue this wedding. There are several reasons that led me to decide to remain a widow myself. So I'm so sorry, don't continue this wedding".

"Aisha?. Is there something wrong with me? "

This time it was Fatih who asked me directly. I didn't answer anything. Besides the tears that fell dripping down my veil.

"none. But sorry, I can't marry you Mas Fatih. My heart is only for Fahmi. I'm sorry".

" But you agreed before. Why change your mind now? ".

" I agree, because it was Mom who supported me and asked me directly. My children also gave me blessing. But really, honestly I still love my husband Mas Fahmi very much, even though now his body is no longer in the world ".

" Aisha, didn't you tell me?".

Fatih cried and cried. Honestly, I feel guilty. But I can't continue this marriage.

"I'm sorry".

I stood up and left everyone still confused. I don't care, right now I just want to cry. I went into the room, and looked at the wedding photo of myself with Mas Fahmi.

" Mas Fahmi, Aisyah Mas Promise. Mas Fahmi will meet and gather with Aisyah again after Aisyah died. Aisyah loves you very much, Mas Fahmi. Thank you very much Mas, for allowing Aisyah to read this letter, a few hours before Aisyah's marriage contract with Mas Fatih. Wait Aisha, baby".

I said in between tears as I looked at the wedding photo of myself with Mas Fahmi eight years ago.

The wedding ceremony was eventually cancelled. Everyone has dispersed. Only Mas Fatih and Mama left. Mother Layla, I didn't see her there. I don't know what I'm talking about with Mas Fatih. I didn't get out of the room. And just looking from the gap of the door that was slightly open.

"Son, Fatih wants to talk to you".

" I'm sorry Mom, Aisyah is not looking to meet anyone for now".

"Son Ayesha, just for a moment. Nak Fatih wants to stay".

"Alright Mom".

I walked lazily to meet Mas Fatih. I'm not feeling good and I feel guilty. But how else. My love for her is no longer there, I agreed to marry her again because Mother asked me to.

" Aisha, I'm leaving. Go forever from your life. Now I realize that I was too stupid to love you so much. Until I was a widower for eight years. Through this incident, God opened the door of my heart. In this second, I have to forget everything about you. As small as that, and set my foot on starting my new life with another woman. Thank you for teaching me what patience and loyalty mean. Sorry if I have so much wrong with you. You're the most incredible woman I've ever known. Fahmi will be so happy to have you. Assalamu'alaikum ".

Fatih wiped her tears. I'm sure he's very disappointed and hurt. At least he understands my position.

" Again, Sorry. I pray, may Mas Fatih get happiness with other women. And thank you so much for everything. Waalaikumsalam ".

I looked at Mas Fatih's body, gradually leaving me. My mother and my two children also watched Mas Fatih leave this house and from my life again. In this second, I have to start my new life as well. Happy for Mom, and my two children. The three of them are what I have now. No loyalty is easy to lose, if the love is already rooted in the heart and soul.

EXPIRE

Thank you to Readers who have faithfully read and take the time to read my work that is not how much. Thank you for your kindness and support.

The author wishes readers who have read or have not read my work. He is given health and sustenance to Allah. Aamyn

Warm Greetings and Greetings

Noktafia Diana Citra

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