Black Pen

30

I followed it with a heavy heart, with anxiety and fear.

"Are you going to leave me after this?" . I looked at his face with fear. Yeah, I was so scared he left me after everything we've done so far.

"Don't think of it like that, do I look so bad in your eyes?". Akbar asked back.

I looked at him doubtfully, wanting to tell the truth if he was really bad in my eyes.

The man before me was the father of my baby-to-be, how could he just throw away my baby-to-be, even a hungry tiger did not eat its own child.

" Alright, I trust you, I'll throw it away but after this I want us to have a bond more than just dating, you don't need to marry me as soon as possible, I'll give you some distance to it . I just want one more serious bond than ever". I looked at his face that looked confused.

"I agree".  Akbar nodded his head, I was well aware, he was just trying to comfort me, reassuring me completely that I was willing to throw away the baby that was inside my stomach.

"If something happens to me, what will you do ?".

What can I do now? To let her live was impossible considering that she would be a disgrace in my family, what would happen if I still chose to keep her? Maybe Mama will be very shocked and I obviously don't want that to happen, but killing her is not the right thing. She's my baby, and the fault is mine, she's just a victim even if she can talk maybe she wouldn't want to have a cruel mother like me.

"That's not going to happen, I'm going to be with you, don't think about anything but our future ". To hell with this bastard, he was able to convince me and foolishly I always believed him, so much so that I loved him that he was able to blind my eyes and mind completely.

I tried to understand the situation even though my little heart was unable to accept the reality I was experiencing this second, I slowly nodded in agreement with her choice, which was to kill my own flesh and blood .

"I'm sorry Dad, son, I don't want you just your presence is not at the right time" Akbar stroked my flat stomach with his right hand, then slowly kissed it. My heart seemed to be slashed at that miserable sight, But, Akbar has a point. He was not present at the right time, maybe if he stayed alive I would be even more sick considering he would be a mockery of his friends later.

A pill was white, round in shape and it felt so bitter I felt on the tip of my tongue.

Akbar gave it to me a few minutes ago, which I knew the pill would work fast for even less than 24 hours, although I've never seen the pill before but I'm pretty sure about the side effects I felt after taking it.

"Hey, you'll be fine, I promise ! I'm sorry . I had to do it" Akbar looked into my empty eyes, my mind still drifting away at death.

I ignored his words, my head began to feel heavy, even my body seemed to float so lightly carrying my mind flying far above the clouds.

Seeing me ignore him, he looked so upset. He walked to the front room to talk and just drink alcohol with his friends. As for me, he just let it lie down.

Apparently Farid had indeed invited his friends who also knew Akbar before I came.

Two hours later my stomach and lower back hurt, my body felt weak, and my temperature was a little hot.

Suddenly warm blood flowed out of the area of my vagina, shortly after a lump like meat mixed with fresh blood smelling fishy wet my pants white instantly turned bright red. Again, ignoring the pain, I slowly closed my eyes hoping to sleep and every inch of the pain disappeared. In fact, the pain is becoming.

I touched my warm pants, then I lifted my hand to make sure that it was just sweat or water next to me spilling on my pants.

"Huh, Blood !" My heart raced so fast, even to scream I felt incapable, my throat was suffocating.

I crawled towards the bathroom my head was still throbbing violently, my vision started to blur, I held onto the wall of the house while walking slowly.

My stomach feels nauseous seeing and smelling the smell of fresh blood continuously flowing from my mouth ******. I don't know how much blood came out.

I immediately cleaned it, wearing the large bandage I had prepared before and the change of clothes I had brought before I came here, with the pain I returned to my couch and wrapped up the blood clot and then in the grave when I got to my house later.

I immediately packed up to go through the back door before anyone saw my situation, I walked in limp, they did not realize my departure, I left Akbar who was partying there.

As if he didn't care he let me be in pain alone, while he was partying with his friends.