Waiting for Love for Me

09 JEALOUS

The next day Dimas took Alila to the mall. Unlike usual, this time Dimas took him to a different mall, not the mall they often went to.

"Why not go to the usual mall, Dim?"

"It's okay."

Dimas embraced Alila's shoulder and walked calmly beside her.

He couldn't possibly say the reason, because he knew Tama also bought work clothes at the mall they came to yesterday. Dimas did not want Alila would actually remember when he went with Tama, because today he also wanted to buy work clothes for his needs while in Bandung.

"Where are we going?"

"To the mall."

Dimas answered the origin without looking.

"It's also at the mall, Dim. I mean what are we here to buy?"

Dimas just shut up. Her footsteps that Alila followed had already walked into one of the men's clothing stores. Alila began to understand. Dimas will definitely buy the clothes he needs while in Bandung.

"Pick for me, Al." Pinta Dimas's.

"What do you need?"

Alila's hands began to pick and choose a plain shirt hanging in rows.

"Long sleeve plain shirt, dark color work pants, singlet t-shirt, boxer pants, underwear......"

Spontaneous Alila's hand covered Dimas' still-nyerocos mouth. While the saleswoman who followed just smiled amusedly at the behavior of the two of them.

"Dim, don't be so hard!"

"Why? I'm just answering your question."

"But there's no need to mention it to the inside, too, Dim. Shame on you.."

Alila pouted as she continued choosing some shirts for Dimas.

(I'm getting anxious to see you pout like that, Al )

After the shirt, Alila moved to the formal pants section. It did not take long, he had taken three trousers according to Dimas size.

"Al, do you know the size of my pants?"

"of course. What I don't know about you, Dim."Alila was arrogant.

"Do you also know my heart for you?"

Dimas tilted his face to look at Alila.

Without warning Alila's face immediately hinted with embarrassment. His mouth was tightly shut without daring to make another sound.

Dimas still held his position staring at Alila earlier, making the saleswoman who served them feel rattled themselves to see the behavior of Dimas and Alila who he considered friendly and so sweet.

Alila turned her gaze away from Dimas, then turned to hand over her chosen item to the faithful saleswoman waiting. Dimas smiled satisfiedly at Alila who was avoiding their eyes.

Now it was Alila's turn to follow Dimas choosing his underwear. Dimas not too long to choose because for him anyway everything will not be seen when he wears it. Except when he sleeps in his own room, he is used to only wearing boxer pants and singlet shirts or tee shirts only.

Finished with his choice, Dimas left everything to the saleswoman and along with Alila he headed to the cashier to make the payment. They came out of the store with three large paper bags.

Dimas invited Alila to rest at one of the taverns in the foodcourt area. After ordering they immediately find a seat.

"Dim, since when have you been jealous of Tama?"

Dimas looked at Alila who was sitting in front of him.

"Jealous?"

"Yes, you're jealous to see me walk with Tama. You were jealous to see me accompany Tama shopping for clothes back then. That's why you don't want to buy your needs in the same place as Tama. Is that really what I said?"

Alila had already started talking openly with Dimas. He didn't want any misunderstanding between himself and Dimas. Plus now he knows Dimas no longer considers him just a friend.

Alila wanted to give Dimas a chance to love her more than their closeness all along. Alila did not want to waste the opportunity to be able to make Dimas confident with Dimas' feelings for her.

Dimas who was being asked by Alila looked at the woman seriously.

"If so why? I'm jealous of Tama because I love you, Al. No longer the affection as a friend like this. I love you because-.."

Dimas cut off his sentence and looked Alila in the eye with a sharp glare.

"Because what?"

"I love you because that's how my heart feels, Al. Not because of what and why. This affection just comes without a reason."

Dimas' eyes turned shady and full of tenderness. There are no lies there. There is only honesty and sincerity.

Their conversation halted for a moment as the waiter delivered the drink they ordered.

"May I know Dim, since when did you feel it?"

"Which one should I answer, Al? Since when did I get jealous of Tama or when did I start loving you?"

"Both.."

Alila continues to take advantage of the opportunity to find out the true heart of Dimas.

"Since I started to find Tama stealing glances at you secretly, I've been uncomfortable seeing you close or talking to her ever since. I'm starting to feel displeased if you're close to a man other than me."

"From there, my feelings for you also began to change even though I had not noticed it. I just feel like things are different every time I'm with you, especially when I'm with you. There's a strange feeling in my heart, I don't know, I don't fully understand it either, Al.."

(That's enough for now, Al. I want to convince my heart before I tell you everything.)

"May I ask you one more thing, Dim?"

"Just say it, Al."

"Did you feel the same way when you were with your girlfriend?"

Alila knows that Dimas has been nicknamed a playboy because he often bergonta-pair. But what he saw Dimas was always cold to his woman and never indulging in words of love or being friendly with his lover.

"No. I've never felt anything more with them, Al. It was like their personal bodyguard. Just go here and there as you please. And in the end they left me alone."

Dimas smiled wryly and then laughed at himself.

"Hmm.., have you really never fallen in love with them, Dim?

"Don't I ever tell you everything, Al? I don't care if others believe it or not, but that's the truth."

Alila hid her happiness tightly. What he heard last night in the car and what he had just heard here, had already made him even more convinced to keep waiting for the love of the person he had loved wholeheartedly for four years.

"I.."

"Yes?"

"I want to ask you something.."

"What?"

"Don't forget me, Al. Don't let anyone replace me when I can't be with you."

(Is my request excessive, Al?)

Alila recalled that the day after Dimas was about to leave for three months.

Suddenly his face turned sad and his heart felt a stifled tightness.

"I'll probably feel lost, Dim. But I can't possibly forget you."

Dimas could see the sadness on Alila's face. But he can't do anything.

"Don't show me your grief is Al, or I won't go."

"I'm sorry, Dim.."

Alila tried to smile back and continued to look into Dimas' eyes.

"We're going home now?"

Alila nodded her head. Dimas stood up and carried all the paperbags with his left hand. Then his right hand grabbed Alila's hand and led her away from the place.

Dimas continued to hold tightly onto Alila's hand. Alila who felt the warmth of the touch, subconsciously returned Dimas's grasp equally tightly, making Dimas turn to him and smile with a happy feeling.

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