Never Gone (Health and Obsession)

Because I want to live

The green iris began to open slowly, the sound that the monitoring sound that had been sounding from earlier sounded slowly them.

The light that began to catch the iris was visible until the sound that was first heard in his ear when he woke up.

"He's conscious!"

I don't know who said it, the woman doesn't know. But what he knew for sure was a blurred look in front of him.

What the hell's going on?

Why are they surrounding me?

Like I'm forgetting something? But what is it?

His eyes still feel like he wants to return closed even though he is not sleepy, but some people like being invited to talk continuously.

...

2 Days later.

Axel waited beside the woman who was now asleep, although it had awakened before her but her condition was still so weak that she was unable to interact or speak.

"Mommy? Mommy sleepy to come out? Though Axel waited for Mommy to wake up," said the adorable child to the mother.

The eyes that had been closed were now opened slowly again.

"Mommy? Mommy uda is awake? Wake Mom! it's noon!" axel was excited when his mother opened her eyes.

For him now just wait for his beloved father to come back and after that they can gather together again.

Axels? Is this real?

I want to hug her...

The woman could not move at all but she very much embraced her beloved little prince.

His body and voice were like being restrained to make him feel paralyzed. But this time he was able to move slowly.

Her green iris just silently looked towards the face of her son who was staring at her with a sparkle.

He misses his son even really want to hold him even though his body still can not move normally and perfectly.

"Mommy cry? Why cry?" axel asked in surprise as he wiped the tears of his mother who fell when he looked at her.

His tiny hand came closer and wiped away the woman's tears.

"Don't cry Mom, is it too bad?" his words with innocence and a face that looks radiant because it sees the mother who has been aware.

...

Day after day began to pass, now Ainsley money is still in the postoperative treatment period began to improve and show results.

Slowly the beautiful woman began to realize if the people who came at her were dwindling.

"He where is Mah?" ask Clarinda when she helps with her treatment.

"Who?" clarinda asked who opened the woman's wheelchair and helped the other nurse.

"Richard," answered Ainsley.

"There are affairs, the important thing is that you are healthy first" Clarinda told her daughter although she was surprised before her.

Ainsley no longer asked, he also chose silence for the absence of the man.

"Mommy!"

The voice that made her smile again, swept away her negative thoughts and just looked towards the voice that was able to calm her anxiety.

"Hey? Don't run, boy, fall." said Ainsley softly to his approaching son with some flowers.

"Axel seneng Mommy has woken up, if Daddy knows it will definitely be more fun!" she smiled at her mother.

"That I'm the same Axel was here first," said Ainsley who asked that his adoptive mother did not wait for him and could do other activities.

"really? Mamah lives first well, there is business." said Clarinda who is related there is indeed something he has to do.

"Will you call the nurse if for example there is something? Or you can call Mamah" Clarinda said before leaving.

Ainsley nodded with her smile looking at her mother and left.

Axel saw the mother who was still sitting in a wheelchair if not accustomed to the condition of her body.

"Why? Axel, how do you see Mommy keep on, son?" ainsley asked as she gently stroked her son's hair.

"Axel wants to be in Mommy's lap" replied innocently, longing for the mother's lap.

Ainsley smiled, he was happy to comply with the request of his son even though his body condition was still not optimal.

"Mom?" call the adorable boy on the lap of the mother.

"Yes, Love?" ainsley replied as she looked at her son.

"Daddy when is it coming back from the sky? Axel kangen Daddy.." said his slush with a lethargic face.

It used to be when the mother did not realize she always missed the woman and was with her father.

But now the father is not even visible at all.

"Corn? What's Daddy doing to the sky?" asked Ainsley who was confused to hear her.

"His word is to pick up Axel's sister. But until I don't turn back..."

"Axel didn't miss Daddy, Daddy didn't miss Axel what?" ask her gently to her mother.

While Ainsley was still amazed to hear it, he did not know anything since he realized and still no one told him.

"Maybe Daddy's busy, baby" he told his son.

To her puzzling question it was just the utterance of a distraught little boy searching for the whereabouts of the father.

"Mommy won't be like Uncle Sean anymore, will she?" axel suddenly asked Ainsley.

This time Ainsley was confused again to hear it.

Since when did he go with Sean?

"When did Mommy go with Uncle Sean son? Mommy's never been anywhere" she told her son.

"lik! Axel knows how Mommy is the same uncle Sean abandoned Axel with Daddy! Mommy didn't want to come when Axel was sick!" resist Axel immediately because he knew the mother went with another man.

The pretty face looked confused and frowned.

"Who said Axel? Mommy also wants to see Axel." asked Ainsley who was confused.

"Daddy said it! Though Mommy promised not to stay in Axel but instead just forget Axel,"

"Axel was sad Mom, Daddy was sad too." he told his mother.

Ainsley was silent for a moment, his little son said that the father made up a story like he went with another man even though it was actually the man who did not let him see his son.

"Uncle Sean is evil! Axel hates uncle Sean! He made Mommy sick, made Mommy stayin same lupain Axel! Make Daddy sad!" her splices again were filled with the look of hateful eyes when saying the man's name.

Ainsley was silent for a moment to see her, he did not even know her innocent and kind son could give a look full of anger.

He does not want his child to grow by building hatred in others, he wants his son to grow with affection and become a gentle man later on.

"If it's good why for Mommy stayin Axel with Daddy first?" ask him instantly.

"Mommy never lived in Axel or Daddy" Ainsley replied to her son, stroking the adorable child's head.

"lik! If Mommy doesn't leave Axel why Mommy doesn't come when Axel is sick? Axel's always waiting for Mommy!" refute it instantly.

Ainsley was silent for a moment to hear him, although he knew and could tell the truth but he chose to be silent because he did not want Axel to look or think badly about his father.

"Sorry, Mommy was wrong. Next time Mommy promises there'll be 24 hours for Axel, hm?" said Ainsley who chose not to say anything about what happened.

"Huh! Axel is Mommy!" say it with a sullen face and bulging cheeks.

"So Axel will not want to be with Mommy?" ainsley asked his son.

"But if Mommy has woken up Axel sorryin, but a smooth promise to make a lot of cake for Axel with Daddy later? Oh yeah, same with Axel's sister!" say it to the mother.

"Yes dear," replied Ainsley giving her a smile.

...

The sun that begins to set gives a light that begins to dim and replace it with moonlight.

The night was getting higher but did not make the woman fall asleep even though her little son was asleep.

"You still haven't slept?" asked a man to make him take his eyes off.

"No, I told you something I wanted to ask" Ainsley replied to Liam as he arrived.

"I'm sorry for my delay" Liam said, looking down.

"It's okay" Ainsley replied as she stroked her son.

"It's been almost a week, where's he been?" ask the man who is the subordinate of her husband.

Liam was silent for a moment hearing her, the reason she and others still tell about the man's death because dr. Terry says to hold off all the bad news until the woman adapts to her heart well.

"Master still has business, you'll know nan-"

"He's got another woman?" ainsley asked cutting off the man's words.

His little son always said about a sister he didn't even know. At first he ignored her but the little man kept talking about playing with his sister when the father was back.

Liam was immediately surprised to hear that, he did not understand why his master's wife thought about it.

"What makes the lady think that way?" liam asked.

"Maybe, right? Can he get bored of me? And..."

"Maybe he'll repay me? He always thought I was cheating, right?" ainsley answered the man.

Liam was silent for a moment, he knew what the woman in front of him said made sense.

"But you don't believe that he loves you, do you?" ask the woman.

"Love me?" muttered Ainsley while recalling her last memory with her husband.

Her eyes and face were cold with no expression, an attitude that ignored her and also made her injured at all times.

"Is that why he saved me, right? I intend to die?" ainsley asked with a trembling voice.

The man's hands clenched hearing her, he could not understand why the woman in front of him tried to kill herself.

And the end of it all made him lose his master.

"Mrs!" his words immediately raised his voice.

Ainsley flinched, he immediately saw his son, and fortunately the sound did not make his son wake up.

Axel who fell asleep because he was tired of playing with his mother because he was excited after a long time not together with his mother.

"The color of your rash attitude" said Luka who was silent and did not continue his speech.

"Do you know what happened to your choice?" her question is holding her information.

Ainsley was silent and looked towards the man.

"Why did you choose to do such a foolish act? What do you get by trying to die?" ask her who does not understand the way the woman's mind.

Ainsley was silent for a moment, the beginning of which he stared flatly but slowly a thin smile was seen on his face.

"You think I tried to kill myself because I really wanted to die?" ask the man when he opens his voice.

Liam gets heated up, his hands clenched at his hearing, now he thinks if the woman is just playing a dangerous prank and in the end makes the life of her master who replaces her.

"Why did you do that stupid thing?!" ask her who momentarily forgot the courtesy to the woman who loved her master very much.

The thin smiling face gave an empty look and still could not heal the wounds in the heart which even now began to feel bland as he got used to his wounds.

"The color I want to live, I do it not to die but because I want to live." she replied.

Liam doesn't understand as soon as he hears her.

Wanna live?

If you want to live, why kill yourself?

That was the main question in his head.

"If you want to live you should be tid-"

"But no matter how hard I try, I can't breathe." Ainsley cut in.

"When no one strangled me, there was no covering my nose but I still couldn't breathe at all,"

"I feel pain, and feel like I'm really tormented..."

"When I'm not hurt, I want to be free. I want to be able to breathe again, I don't want to be sick anymore, I want to live..."

said the woman with a vibrating voice, even now she sometimes still feels it.

Maybe for others psychological problems are easy but, do not know if it is very dangerous.

How much of his soul had been destroyed, how deep the depression had accumulated and how much pain had been inflicted in his heart.

No one knows because everyone seems to ignore their wounds and only see their own wounds.

Liam is still silent, he does not really understand the emotions or psychology of someone who has been destroyed.

"You won't understand, and I hope you won't know what it's like." said Ainsley smiling but giving an indescribable look.

Her tears shed, her chest ached again when she felt an outburst of emotion that made her re-injured.

He didn't want anyone else to feel what he was feeling.

Injured, Desperate, Losing hope, and possibly losing himself.

Something that really makes him feel like he is lost and unable to think clearly.