Forced to endure

Chapter 5

A few days passed after my last visit to my in-laws' house. I can't describe how I'm related to Mas Adji right now.

I was cold to her and always tried to avoid her. But Mas Adji kept being warm to me. She kept flirting and seducing me as if I was just "wandering" as usual.

But what I feel right now is not just a "pig". I felt angry, disappointed, sad, humiliated and also for the first time felt insecure over my appearance. I feel like I'm all one. I was confused and feeling helpless at the same time.

I feel trapped in a situation I really don't want but I can't do anything about it. I really want to part with Mas Adji and end this lie-filled household. But Mas Adji wanted otherwise. He won't divorce me. His mother who disliked me didn't let us get a divorce, let alone my family.

Mas Adji gave me a pretty living. He never did physical violence to me. Even when he was drunk he could still control his attitude towards me. And until now she has consistently denied that she is dating the woman.

So what would I make of an excuse to file for divorce? Will the judge grant my lawsuit if the reason for our divorce is because Mas Adji often gambles and gets drunk. Is it that easy?

Does this mean I have to endure and accept what Mas Adji has done? Or do I have to change my appearance the way I used to so that she's not interested in other women?

"Kei, tonight's a walk yuk ... Wouldn't you?"

Mas Adji approached Keisha who was playing on the floor while I sat on the sofa watching television. Ever since my quarrel, Mas Adji has always stayed at home after work. He never got drunk or just went out with his friends.

"You are Pa ...!" answer Keisha spirit.

"Then you said to your mom there. We'll take Mama too, right?" Mas Adji used Keisha to approach me.

"Ma ... Later tonight papa wants to take us for a walk. Want to go to Ma ...? Mama's coming, right?" Keisha came up to me and shook my hand.

"Where to go Kei? Mama males ah, mending at home," I replied lazily. Not lazy to go for a walk but lazy with Mas Adji.

"Come on Ma ... Mama wants to? We haven't been out for a long time?" Keisha's face had turned sullen.

If Keisha had put on a face like this I would not have the heart and would not want to obey his wishes.

"Yes ..iya Mama would," I replied later. Keisha then ran over to his papa again.

"Where are we going to go for a walk?" ask her with a face back sumringah.

"Where did Keisha and Mama want to go. Anyway Papa go wherever you want to go," replied Mas Adji spirit.

I know this is one of Mas Adji's ways to take back my heart. He's been spoiling me ever since that night. He gave me some extra shopping money. Almost every night he took me and Keisha out to eat. He also took me to a clothing store and told me to choose the clothes I liked. Of course I can't refuse this one because I really like to buy clothes.

But it didn't necessarily dampen my desire and make me forgive him. I still stick with my original "I want a divorce!"

I just need to catch Mas Adji wet with that woman and I have real evidence of her forbidden act. After that his family will not consider me making it up and I also easily demand a divorce from him. Now, I just have to be patient and live it.

...****************...

Mas Adji came to me while I was cleaning the kitchen. As usual, before going to bed I make sure everything is clean, then I can sleep well.

"Win, please make me coffee," he said subtly. I was silent neither answering nor refusing.

"Later on the way forward, yes, I again nemenin keisha playing the problem."

Without waiting for my answer Mas Adji went straight back to the front.

After I finished cleaning the kitchen, I joined Keisha and Mas Adji while bringing him the coffee he had requested.

"Hey, it's night time" I told Keisha.

"Now Ma ..."

After a while I went back to remind Keisha to go to sleep.

"This time can not refuse, must immediately go to sleep. School tomorrow, right?"

"Tomorrow papa play again," entertain Mas Adji.

Keisha had to get up from her seat and walk to her room.

"Ma ... will sleep in Keisha's room again right?" yelled Keisha after arriving in front of her room.

"Yes .. "my reply also shouted.

After hearing my reply, Keisha went straight into her room. Suddenly Mas Adji pulled my hand until I fell into his embrace.

"Sleep in our room Win, I miss you" she whispered in my ear.

"Take me off!" cold spoken.

"Until when will you continue like this?"

As much as I could push Mas Adji's body until I got out of his arms.

"Until when? Until you confess your actions!"

"Win, I told you you're just misunderstanding. I'm not talking about Eva!"

"Why are you going to his house? The massage is good huh? Or her nice body?!" I've been provoked by emotion. My words are starting to fade.

"What are you talking about Win?!"

"Not to deny it anymore! Eva told me. I met him!"

Mas Adji seemed excited to hear my words.

"You met him?"

"Yes, why? You don't believe it? He told me that you often visit his house for a massage. How's it? Tastier? Don't you think about my feelings, Mom? You don't think about my pride as your wife?"

"Win, you misunderstood, it's not what you imagined."

"Do you know what I imagine? You know I imagine your body being groped by that woman while you're not wearing clothes? You know I was imagining what happened after that?"

"Win Already ... Already ... Don't keep going! You don't think shit."

"How can I not think of anything if I find out my husband is often with Eva the whore?!!" my snapping. "Why don't you just admit it and we've got this lie? Aren't you tired of constantly denying when I already know the truth?!!"

"I didn't do what you thought Win did."

"Enough Mas! I want your honesty! Admit your actions so that we can get divorced as soon as possible and you can be satisfied with her!"

"Win ... Don't say that word again!"

"I want to part with you! Wait till I get the proof and I'll take care of our divorce!" I said as I passed leaving Mas Adji.

I'm not going to my room, but to Keisha's. I no longer want to sleep in a room with a man who has divided his body with another woman.