First Love & Best Friends

Thirty Seven

I don't know what I'm feeling right now, like there's less. Suddenly I felt the loss of Fabian. Not to mention the dream about Fabian still accompanied my sleep. “Truly I like him? The present I really lost her figure? It feels strange at this time, yes even though I realize that now different campus with him.” My mind feels very sad and realize about my feelings now.

At the beginning of college, I didn't find anyone who looked like him. I really lost it this time. Regretful feelings of regret arise when remembering the moments with Fabian appeared, uh more precisely with his strange behavior that made me curious. That question mark is constantly looking for answers to Fabian's strange behavior to me. Though I tried to idolize college friends, but the image of Fabian more powerful rotating in my mind.

But fate brought me to Fabian again through social media. When I was online on Facebook, I saw Fabian was updating his status. I'll comment on Fabian's status immediately. After commenting for a long time, I finally questioned Fabian again while replying to the post wall on his facebook as well. Fabian and I had a reply on the Facebook chronology owned by Fabian when I asked him where, it was true Fabian was still in Semarang. There is a sense of pleasure in knowing Fabian is still in Semarang. Since it is still in the moment of Lebaran Day, I asked Fabian where to go. It turns out Fabian said that Lebaran went home to Kendal and Wonosobo. I was shocked to find Fabian coming home to Kendal. “Hahh, so all this time she's been going back to Kendal? Butesan when I went home in Kendal still Fabian's dream carried over in my sleep. Pantesan also I once dream Fabian ngajakin I vacation to Kendal. It turns out this is the answer my inner” who still feels surprised. I don't know why, I hope to meet him one day.

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A month ago, I became a college kid. Surprisingly, other campuses on holiday, only my majors are still diligent in because the lecturer can teach Saturday morning. This happened on October 30, 2010. I who was tired of waiting for the bus to pass by never came. to the point of meeting with neighbors, younger siblings, Junior High School teachers, and some people I know greeted me this morning. Because so bad as it was waiting for the bus never to come and even meet people I know, I unconsciously muttered”You guys just meet him” .

Shortly after, I was still standing in front of MiniMarket while waiting for the bus, a little surprised to see someone was chatting with a girl riding a motorcycle that almost looks like Fabian passing in front of me. “Kayak has Fabian” muttered slowly.

After someone opened the glass helmet, I was surprised because someone was indeed Fabian. “Mi...” a smile as usual when meeting me. In the back, his sister seemed to be nodding politely at me as well. I replied with a nod as well to respond to Fabian and his sister. Again, again, and again I was fascinated by it. Fabian's performance this morning has made me almost fret. He was wearing a cream-colored jacket that looked so cute. As Fabian's bike moved away, I almost cried with excitement because of Fabian. Arriving at the campus, I could hardly concentrate because I still did not expect the meeting. It really makes me drunk. I've been smiling all day because of Fabian.

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I don't understand everything I'm going through right now. How not? I think ever since I split campus with Fabian, I'm going to completely forget about Fabian. But it turns out Fabian's arrival through a dream made me not understand all this. Even though I myself have focused on doing college tasks, joining with my classmates, and must have adapted little by little to them.

Tonight I slept as usual, but suddenly......

I was at school and going home from school with friends. Because of the SNMPTN test. I, Gazela, Luna, Tyas, Wawan, Pandu and Fabian plan to study together.

As we all walked out the school gate, Fabian asked Gazela about studying the group this afternoon.

“Gaz, later so will you study the group at your home?” ask Fabian.

“Iya Fab so. But I have promised Mimi will study at home with Luna, Tyas, Wawan”, Gazela said.

“Already, I'm going to Mimi's house. Later I will go there with Pandu” explained Fabian as he passed to take Pandu to his house for a while.

While I, Luna, Tyas, Gazela, and Wawan went straight to my house, because they will study this afternoon as well. When we were serious about doing things, it turned out Fabian and Pandu came. After that I told them to go straight inside.

Then I, Luna, Tyas, and Wawan are ready to learn Social Science material. While Gazela, Fabian, and Pandu studied Natural Science materials. While studying at the beginning, seen Wawan asked me about my family. I automatically responded when Wawan asked me, because he was also my best friend.

Then I asked material with Luna, “Lun, I teach this dong, do not understand the same material this”

“Wah Mi, I don't understand this either. Try asking Tyas” Luna.

After inquiring about the material with Tyas, the answer was the same and advised me to ask Wawan. Finally I asked with Wawan and Wawan began teaching Accounting materials. But there was a surprise when he saw Fabian looking at me with a jealous gaze, it seemed Fabian did not like my closeness with Wawan. When free time, I saw they were serious with the material described Pandu. Then I asked Fabian.

“Still much Fab, the material?”

But Fabian didn't respond to me, he focused on what Pandu said. Then I asked again “Learn what the hell Fab?”

Fabian did not respond to me anymore, I finally gave up and joined them while telling stories. But it turns out Fabian still looks at me with a look of dislike. A few minutes later, Fabian suddenly got out of there and came out. I was surprised to find Fabian's strange behavior. I went from there to catch Fabian who looked cranky.

“Lhoh Fab, you haven't had a drink yet.” I said it was cut off because Fabian immediately tancap gas home.

Seeing that incident, me and everyone seemed confused by the behavior of Fabian who just went straight to gas. “Kok Fabian that's it. The same jealous period I had because I chatted with Wawan more often than with him” realized me with hurt feelings. While Pandu is also confused because he does not know who will go home with whom later.

Aware of the incident that was a dream, I was very surprised and felt weak because I think the incident had just been very painful. “Kok Fabian Jealous with Wawan anyway? Though Wawan my best friend, it is natural that I share Wawan deketan” sad me when digesting the contents of the story in the dream. While I myself also still feel bad about Wawan for this dream incident.

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I don't understand the meaning of those dreams. It just feels weird with my feelings. Like the next night, I had a jealous dream with Fabian who had a crush on my college friend. Fabian and I have also split up the campus. I was actually sad when I experienced something like this. What do these dreams that keep me sleeping mean. “What do not-don't this dream sign mean to me? But what is the sign behind all this?” many of you who are still confused find the answer to all this.

The next night, I had another dream.

“Sorry Mi, I'm the same Gazela can not go home with you” explained Luna.

“Iya Mi, sorry yes. Meningan you go home with Fabian alone” Gazela's advice.

I nodded and followed Gazela's advice. Then I approached Fabian to ask for help to be delivered to the house.

“Fab, I need you to go home dong” I asked Fabian

Fabian who had been silent while waiting for someone, immediately turned his head because I called him.

“Eh Mi, very sorry yes I can not nebengin you home. Because Ika asked for anterin I returned home” explained Fabian felt bad.

I smiled and nodded understanding.”Oh, yes Fab. It's nothing”

“Sorry really yes Mi, I can not nganter you go home” said Fabian who still feels bad for me.

“Nothing kok Fab just relax” nod me full of smiles.

Luna seemed to approach me.”How can Fabian Mi?” ask Luna.

I shook my head towards Luna, after which Luna smiled understandingly towards me and gave the idea to go home with Wawan. I finally followed Luna's advice to ask Wawan for help.

“Wawan...” call me for Wawan.

Wawan looked over and immediately responded to me. “What's Mi?”

“I ask please dong, anter until home” my door.

Without a second thought, Wawan agreed. “Iya deh, but briefly yes I have the same business temen-temen” explained Wawan.

I nodded in understanding and waited for Wawan. While from a distance, without me realizing it looks Fabian saw me and Wawan was talking about something.

“OK, I wait in front of Luna” I said.

Wawan responded with a nod at me. Then while waiting for Wawan, I saw Fabian still waiting for Ika. Kutegur.

“Still waiting for Ika ya Fab?” my many.

But Fabian's gaze turned ominous, Fabian's gaze as though it was jealous to me. A few minutes later, Wagner called me.

“Mi, so go home?” ask Wawan

“Eh, yes Wan” nods me.

Immediately I approached Wawan and did not forget to say goodbye to Fabian, but still Fabian did not approve me. When the motor was turned on, I immediately hugged Wawan and started leaving school.

“Fab, I first ya” my pampit for Fabian.

But Fabian didn't see me, he pretended to be indifferent to me. Finding that, I just shook my head and was confused by Fabian's intentions.

Realize that this incident turned out to be a dream. I was very surprised and thought”Kok Fabian Jealous again with Wawan. Wawan is my best friend. If you are as jealous as I am, why did you choose to nganter Ika instead of nganter me? I'm not jealous if you still care about Ika who is your ex. It's not my fault either, is it? I think Wawan is only a friend like Luna, Gazela, and Tyas and my friends Junior High School. With the incident being dreamt of, it seems that I am increasingly clueless as to what Fabian wants through this dream. I feel like Fabian is holding me back so I don't like guys other than Fabian. I myself was also increasingly unpleasant with Wawan, but one day I will tell Wawan.

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