Paper Dove

THE PASSION OF ANGER

I try my best to take care of myself with my left hand. It's been a whole day that Nandes hasn't contacted me. I'm sad. But I was very hard-hearted to contact him first. I'm still thinking about what makes me reluctant to contact him. Is it because he scolded me or because I was avoiding him so as not to explain anything about Juan.

I decided to go shopping to a minimarket near Kosan. With one hand bathed and using a buffer I walked towards the minimarket. I left my phone in my room. The AC coldness hit my face as I opened the minimarket door. I picked up a yellow grocery basket and carried it between the snack and beverage shelves. I took one of the drinks and put it in the basket and then some snacks. 

After paying to the cashier I brought the shopping bag out of the minimarket and sat on the lounge chair in the minimarket. With my left hand I tried to open the can. I was frustrated that I couldn't open it. Then I gave up.

" Ck. when I really want to drink" I complained. I sat long enough to reflect on what was going on in my love story. I can't deny there's a little bit of longing that I keep for Juan in my heart. But I firmly believe that I love Nandes. Maybe because Juan was my first love and I parted with him for a sad reason, I still held a little desire in my heart as he kissed me. The desire to like it back, but I knew I had to shake off that feeling.

I'm a selfish woman who can't decide anything and always realizes too late my own heart. My clear logic tells me to brush off any feelings that arise because of Juan. And I'm gonna do it.

I put the drink back into the grocery bag and went to leave the minimarket.From a distance I saw Nandes standing in front of my boarding house leaning on his car. Pleasure was tucked into my heart, but I tried not to show it. He smiled at me who walked up to him. 

" Where?", Nandes asked softly.

" Minimarket", I answered briefly.

" I'm sorry", Nandes looked at me. 

" yes. I'm also sorry to have said such an ambiguous word", I said slowly. 

"  I lost control yesterday. Nandes pulled me closer. Still sick?", Nandes looked up at my injured hand.

" It hurts sometimes. It's hard to sleep, it's hard to eat and I haven't shampooed. So don't come near me. I have to go to the salon to shampoo", I refused to let Nandes touch my hair. 

" I'll help you, let's go to my apartment?", Nandes persuaded.

I looked at her and nodded approvingly "Yes, I take my HP first", I go into my boarding house. I smiled happily because my problems did not drag on for too long. I quickly tidied things up, picked up my little backpack and went straight to Nandes.

“ Have you eaten? Wanna eat? ”, Nandes asks in mobill. 

I nodded excitedly. “You're so glad I came?”, Nandes guessed.

“ Yes, I guess you're still mad at me.I'm having trouble taking care of myself. I can't shampoo, it's hard to eat but you didn't send a message at all. Wicked”, I'm starting to nag.

Nandes laughs “ Yes forgive me dear. I was busy yesterday. I thought about you all day but couldn't leave my job”, Nandes stroked my hair fondly. 

“ View. I was able to take off my arm support but the wrist still hurts so it still has to be ”, I showed my injured hand to Nandes.

“ Does it still hurt?”, Nandes asked guiltily as if he did that to me.

“ Doesn't hurt if it's not moved with a frenzy. It's just kesleo. I'm fine”, I smile at Nandes. 

Nandes looked at me inside. He wanted to say something to me but hesitated. I didn't try to ask her because I was afraid she would discuss the things I avoided. So I distract him.

" Dear tomorrow I have to go to college, how about we go to bed? It's 12 and a half" and I look at him and stand up. I wore a white Nandes shirt that was up to cover my thighs.

Instead of answering my question, Nandes pulled me to his feet and grabbed my chin, kissing my lips softly and deeply. As if she wanted to show me how much she loved me.I closed my eyes enjoying her warm kiss, then she kissed my cheeks, my shoulders and reached the collarbone. Nandes began to be aggressive, he lowered my shirt side until my breasts were exposed.

I held it with my unscathed hand “ What's with this surprise attack ?”, I was surprised to be unprepared. “ I haven't.. akh”, Nandes doesn't care about my words. He cupped mine with his hand and shut my mouth with his mouth. A warm, affectionate kiss turns into aggressive and a little bit of anger. Nandes led me to lie on the couch. I pushed him a little because I was out of breath. Nandes took off his kiss and took off his shirt. 

“ Nandes, why are you? why is it like this?”, I asked for an explanation trying to sit back but Nandes forced me to sleep and began to kiss me lustfully. He pulled my shirt off and caused the buttons to scatter on the floor. Showing exposing all the parts of me that were just wrapped in underwear.

Nandes kissed the neck, the collarbone up to the top of one of my beauties. “ Your nandes.. akh”, Nandes dipped one of them deep and the other hand played the other end. My logic worked to stop him because he was angry but my body couldn't resist the taste that was presented. I shook, my voice could not be contained, my breath was a bit of a hunt. My left hand reached for Nandes' hair.  I closed my eyes, as his hand crept inside my last protector. Nandes was not troubled because I only used his long shirt without bothering to use house pants. 

He played the most sensitive thing of my life, making my body shake and I sighed in the exaggeration given. He kissed my stomach, kissed my thighs and gave me a kiss there. Nandes went in using his mouth to the core of my life.  Nandes wants to torture me in his own way. He played a long roleplay and made me twitch many times. I limp as he lifts me up and holds me in his lap. 

I looked at him with a pity, half of me gone somewhere. My long hair covered my back. Nades got into me with me in his lap. I screamed stifled, because the taste hit me. I hugged her neck, moving she looked me in the eye and forced me to look at her, her hand on my waist.

“ I hate him touching you. Even the tip of pun” hair, Nandes said sharp and full of hate.

“Hmmm...”, I who is limp and has been lulled by his actions can only murmur indistinctly. He beat me to the end of his limits. He groaned on my chest with me falling drooping on his shoulder. 

I was really exhausted by his actions. He kissed my head, my eyes and my shoulders. “ I'm sorry Dew, I really love you. I'm afraid of losing you ”, Nandes whispered on my shoulder.

I didn't give any response because I was exhausted and very sleepy. Nandes picked me up and took me to my room. Covering our bodies with blankets and we fell asleep with me in his arms. 

***