Deepest Wound

ACCEPTING KAK ARDI'S INVITATION

"Can you sing?" Ask Salwa.

"I can sing, but I've never sung with a musical instrument. Can you play guitar?

I just play the guitar on my lap without answering Salwa's question.

🎵🎶🎵🎶

God can.stop my pulse...

God may stop my heartbeat but not my heart...

This heart is for him...🎶🎵🎶🎵

The wind blowing makes me more and more washed away in my guitar quotes. Added to the atmosphere under the trees which was very cool that afternoon. I ended my guitar chant as I finished the song I was singing.

"Well, you're the one who took our guitar away, '" I heard a voice coming from behind our seats. I saw some students standing there. Sis Ardi was also there while leaning against a tree.

"I'm sorry, just borrow it for a while" I said, returning the guitar.

Then they left too. I saw Brother Ardi walking towards me.

Salwa pointed at Ardi's brother with her eyes telling him that she didn't want to interrupt our conversation.

"Don't stay with me, stay here" I told Salwa, who wanted to leave. Because I feel uncomfortable if it's just the two of you. Finally Salwa waited for me by standing a few meters from my place and Brother Ardi.

"Later after school I want to take you for a walk. You want it, An?"

"I don't like to walk, what else the same people who have not been known," I said.

"Yes, how could you possibly know that you've always avoided this. Wanna, huh? Just a moment, after that I will drive you home safely, I promise," said Ardi pleaded.

I was silent for a moment thinking about Brother Ardi's invitation after I finally agreed to it. "Ok, but promise only for a moment."

"Ok, ready." I saw Brother Ardi was very happy when I accepted his invitation.

"Ehm.., someone is going on a date" Salwa said as we returned to class.

"I was also forced to accept Brother Ardi's invitation...."

"At first forced, but after that we no one knows next," said Salwa laughing while nudging my arm.

"Ihh..., what? Not that."

"To the cafeteria first yukk, thirsty nih," Salwa asked. I agree because I am thirsty too. After quenching our thirst, we went straight back to class because the break was almost over.

After the last lesson was over I packed my books and stationery. I saw that Ardi was waiting for me.

"Come," said Kak Ardi who was ready on his bike. I sat behind Ardi with a feeling of unease because the other children were watching us. Ahh, I remember Mr. Adji who used to piggyback me.

It turned out that Ardi took me to a cafe by the sea and the view made me not stop to admire the beauty of the place. In the middle of this city crowd I just knew there was a place as beautiful and quiet as this. Even I can see some ships that are sailing the sea.

"Ehm, may you like the place," said Brother Ardi disperse me.

"E I yes, I like it. It's so beautiful and quiet, "I couldn't hide the happiness of that moment. And I saw Brother Ardi looking at me with a difficult gaze to understand.

"So often smile like that, because I notice you rarely smile. And.., I often see you're always alone."

I cast my eyes on the ships that were sailing the sea there. I think back to my nickname as the son of the unlucky bearer. For some reason there is a worry that has arisen in my heart after these past few years I have never thought about it. But today I remember again. What if someone knows who I am? About me that my own family doesn't want.

Not long after the cafe waiter came to bring the food we ordered.

"Let's eat first, don't think about what I said earlier. You still look sweet even if you just remain silent without expression," praised Kak Ardi.

I smiled at Brother Ardi's words, and we ate quietly. The atmosphere of the sea with the blowing wind made me feel at home for a long time in that place. Not long after the other cafe waiter came to bring a bowl of ice cream and put it in front of us. Then I looked at Brother Ardi because I was confused by the dish that was only provided in one bowl.

"Let's try it" said Brother Ardi while giving me an ice cream spoon. "Eskrim will be more delicious if enjoyed in one container," explained Kak Ardi while scooping the ice cream and eating it. I took the ice cream with my spoon and ate it.

The ice cream tastes good even though it is enjoyed by itself. It might just be more romantic if you eat together.

"Do you know what you like or dislike?" Ask Brother Ardi.

"In what way?" Ask me back.

"In all things, anything. That's if you don't mind telling her."

I shut up for a moment to remember. "I like it when I can do what I want."

"What's like playing music?"

"For me music is just entertainment just to drive away the loneliness."

Brother Ardi stared intensely at me. "Then, what is your greatest desire?"

"Let's go home, it's too late in the afternoon," I said, wanting to get out of my seat.

My greatest wish is to be acknowledged by my family. But how could I explain it to everyone including Ardi.

"Wait until sunset. Would you wait a minute?"

"But it's been a very late afternoon, not that Brother has promised to take me home."

"But the sunset can only be seen when it gets dark. You'll wait a little while."

Brother Ardi begged and again I did not have the heart to refuse. But my saturation paid off when I could watch the sunset as Kak Ardi said earlier. It is remarkable that almighty creation created the universe with all its beauty.

After a while watching the sunset, Ardi brought me home.

"Anita...."

I turned to Brother Ardi who called me when I got off the bike.

"Thank you for your time today" said Ardi, smiling at me.

I just nodded while returning his smile. And then I went inside.

I went to the bathroom and then after cleaning, I prayed Maghrib. After praying after folding the prayer mat and mukena I lay on my bed, closed for a moment while remembering when Ardi and I watched the sunset.

Am I the only person Ardi ever asked to see the sunset? Was there not a lot of girls that he invited there before? Kak Ardi, was nicknamed a crocodile by his friends. Ahh.., those questions popped into my head. What's the matter!?Why do I suddenly care.