Black Room

Homehouse

Home is not a place for her feelings

***

In the evening, I gathered with the humans in the dark. We sat in our usual place to spend the night. This Gadang minang house is a stilt house used for the jambak tribe customary event. In my village, or in the surrounding area, the rumah gadang that became the traditional house of minang has been a step for us to meet. There are many tribes in the custom of minang, but only a few tribes who have a rumah gadang to carry out their tribal customary events. Civilization and modernization have succeeded in changing the order of life of the people. Sooner or later culture will only become history in people's lives. And the pond house that became our headquarters is one of the four houses that are still firmly standing.

We sat down with a bunch of weed and a minute of wine. I feel like I'm at a height with a combination of dope shabu this afternoon. The hair that still feels tense and the head that feels roomy makes me so relaxed tonight. But I tried to control myself so my friends wouldn't know I was ready to kill. They'll be sensi if they find out I'm killing.

Tonight's talk is about life. Bang Febi told me about the hardships of his life in the village. Without a job makes bang febi feel fed up with his life. Bang Febi felt like he would go crazy if he lingered on living a boring life like this. Of course, bang febi lives in the village. In the village people will only have two activities in each day. During the day to work, and at night to chat in a coffee shop that sometimes also gossip. There is no entertainment or pleasure that can eliminate the taste. Different from the city, we will feel entertained by just watching the crowd and flickering lights of the city.

"No human being is perfect. The lives of people we think are perfect are impossible never have any difficulties. And maybe they don't complain like us" said pram advising bang febi.

Bang pram is right. Sometimes we are just too lamenting the hardships we experience until we judge the lives of others as perfect compared to our lives. In fact, it could be out there that many people are not as lucky as we are and want a life like ours.

"Rubber.... Yeah, don't complain much if you're a man" Bang deni agreed.

"The point is, just go for it" Pram said.

"Tumben wise the words of pre-night now" said bang gates.

"Pram if you're ready, you'll look smart. But if it has not been able to sabu, the moron is visible" Cetus bg deni.

We laughed. Pram and bang dani also consume shabu today. That means it wasn't just me who combined three-dimensional poison into my blood. There are pram and bg deni that turned out before also sucking meth. While I got a shabu from ipan which turned out to take me to the rice fieldlunto to exchange a line of marijuana with one gram of methamphetamine.

"Emang yes. When ready to turn, our insight becomes open" Sahut pram.

"But if you can't already be a person*****" Cheltuk bang deni.

We laughed out loud.

"His fault. The risk of getting ready is that the bag is dry immediately"

The price of one package of methamphetamine is 200, 300, 500, and 800. That's pretty big money in our limitations as users. Our average pencharian is a gold miner. Among the eight people we had in the house of Gadang. I'm the only one still in school. The other is a daily gold miner. Except Gates who is indeed jobless happy. The economy is based on gold mines. Where if this gold mine is razed or banned by the government for a long time. So, the economic life of the community will experience a financial crisis. Even traders in the market like my mother complained about the lack of market. Mother said the gold mine raid brought economic collapse.

"Shabu is indeed for people who have a lot of money" said bg deni while smoking marijuana very deeply.

Bg deni is right, in a meager income with an urgent need. We must not be selfish by neglecting basic needs only for pleasure which becomes a complementary need. While I was sucking shabu just because it was free. I wouldn't suck a shabu if I was asked to buy it first. Because, I realized that my life would be ruined if I had been dependent on the shabu that is not cheap.

That was the first time I smoked a shabu. I who introduced marijuana to ipan, replied ipan by introducing shabu to me. Our friendship is like a symbiotic mutualism.

Silly songs are playing adorning the story tonight. The conversation gets more intense discussing life. Money is life. That's our talking point. There is no human being who does not need money. Most people are also enslaved by money.

"Life without a HP and a motor is like a broken leg, can not go anywhere" said bg febi who described his complaint. Muaro bodi is a dead village, there is no busyness and life. Even bg febi once said its status 'campaign ******'. Bg Febi was fed up with the pardoned life. He felt he could go crazy, if he stayed longer in the village.

"There's no life here" Bg Febi wanted to be damned. He missed his life being destroyed.

Naff song played on the music list, terendap laraku melodious. When the cold strikes me, this song reminds me of buk mutia. Someone who broke my heart. But I try not to remember the painful things of buk mutia.

"Sir, if given one request from God, you want to be rich" said Momom.

We laughed at Momon's silliness. Momon

"Hey mon, being rich is a dream of many" said Gates.

"Mon.. If only God had given one request.. It's good to ask to go to heaven directly mon" Pram chimed in.

"Yes well, obviously you survived the world" said bg eldom.

We kept talking about Momon with laughter. A packet of marijuana and wine is over. But our conversation is getting bigger. Gates told me about momon's other silliness. My BlackBerry rang, the notification light flickering the incoming BBM sign.

Fiona Lantika's

"Tomorrow's Sunday night, busy?"

The Alendra

"Would you take me for a walk?"

Fiona Lantika's

"Later the young teacher was jealous"

I'm hissing. Fiona also knows that I like buk mutia. Naff's song answers with his lyrics that give a twist. Like I admire someone who already has a girlfriend. 

....Tired of holding back what I felt, though I know, I still crave you....

The Alendra

"He already has a girlfriend"

In the end, the pain made me understand the sincerity of loving. A truly sincere heart will stop at nothing to love, even when faced with the reality of love clapping one hand. Sincerity will not disappear just because it is not reciprocated.

Rain began to fall, specks could be heard walking over the attic. We rushed to go home soon. But it rained very fast. We went back to the shelter of the rumah gadang. Our heads and some of our clothes were a little wet because we were intending to break through the rain.

"Well, what time is it?"

"At 12 hours less"

"Have forgotten the clock for chatting" said gates.

We took shelter in the wall of the house. It rained heavily. The words of the gates earlier interpreted our habits when they had gathered. As if it were commonplace. Tonight just because it's raining we want to go home. If it wasn't raining. We haven't thought about going home yet.

The rain was getting heavier, strong winds directed the patches of water that bounced from the kula towards us. We were getting up against the wall, sitting on the stairs. The rain blocked our way home, the sound of rain made the conversation frenetic. BlackBerry is ringing again, a message from Fiona comes in.

Fiona Lantika's

"In the meantime we graduate, you've been thinking after graduation what will it be?"

Fiona was like asking for ideals. Things I never thought of before. I went to school just to graduate. Not to be a pilot, a cop, or such a grandiose ideal. It's not that I don't want to, but I don't want to pressure myself with such expectations. For me, life is a day to live. Future and tomorrow are matters of destiny.

The Alendra

"Supassing is not necessarily. But after graduation, I want to wander. Work and save as soon as you open your own business. Dude?"

A desire is a desire in the future. Like a dream for tomorrow. Ijep aspires to be a soldier. Nando wants to be a cop. If they ask for ideals, I just know I want to wander and live alone. I wanted to live independently long ago. I feel I can step on my own. My desire from childhood is to want to escape from my mother's embrace. I hate home when I'm home. When the mother and father's egos fight each other gives the picture that I am just a burden that makes them continue to fight. I don't know who's wrong. I feel like home is not the place for my feelings.

Fiona Lantika's

"If I want to enter the tourism business"

Ideals are hope. Hope is our passion for the future. Of course, everyone hopes for a better life. Fiona wants to attend a tourism school. The thing that becomes his obstacle he must be able to speak ingris. For that fiona trying to memorize the ingris language. While my ambitions want to wander past high school. For that I have to graduate with a pretty good grade. However, I will understand later; that dreams are the purpose and direction of life.

The rain began to subside, we went home. I sleep with hard eyes closed. The effect of shabu was still felt this afternoon. I surfed twitter to drive away my boredom. As always, writing a tweet is my habit.