Tidying Up Asa, Inviting Hidayah

4. The Idamanku Imam.

String.

I was a plegmatic girl with almost no aspirations. I never thought, at my age that has not even 19 years, there have been many men who are interested in me and want to ask for me. A little disturbing the peace of life, because in my mind and mind there is absolutely no desire to get married. I still want to enjoy my youth, like my other peers.

Especially from all the men who came to express their intention to propose, no one entered the criteria of my dream husband candidate. Some of them I've never even known, and I'm not the kind of girl who can be in a relationship with a guy without knowing each other first.

Surprisingly among the men came, there was someone who asked me directly to my father and mother. A man I've known since childhood, a man I used to know as a friend of Neesha's sister. His name is Lionel Baga Wisesa. The only son of a landlord who is quite famous in Surabaya.

But the arrival of Lion's brother just disturbs me. I don't like the reckless way he asked me, as if he wanted to race for me. We are familiar, because from the beginning he often came to the house to meet with sister Neesha. Even as far as I am concerned, he once expressed love for Neesha's sister but was rejected.

It made me doubt her feelings for me. Does he really love me? Or just an obsession? It could be because she didn't manage to get Neesha's love, and then she approached me. If so, wouldn't it just cause trouble? How could he live with me, while his feelings were still on my brother?

I am not at all amazed by the courage of Brother Lion to meet his father and mother. Moreover, father told me, there is no way that father will approve of my relationship with Lion's brother. Because my father was already hurt by the unpleasant treatment done by his mother Lion brother against Brother Neesha many years ago.

Actually brother Lion is a good person, Soleh, also quite understand religion. These last few months he's been seeing me at Dito's. Although I salute the gentleman attitude of Lion. But that doesn't mean I fell in love with him, I just appreciate his attitude that dared to meet me at Dito's house. Maybe because Brother Lion knows, I might not want to meet outside. Meeting me at Dito's house is a wise and proper way. Even though it hasn't touched my heart.

Since meeting at Neesha's wedding, Lion's sister and I have been communicating intensely. Lion calls me often. We talked about my college assignment. Brother Lion was careful enough to approach me, so that I would feel comfortable making friends with him.

I am comfortable making friends with Lion, but to take things more seriously, I still have my doubts. Because to me, Brother Lion is a man who once loved my brother. Forever the feeling may not be completely gone and someday it will arise again. I don't want to just be an impingement.

So when Brother Lion and his parents came to the house to express the intention of asking for my hand, I chose to run to Jakarta to meet Brother Neesha. I told her everything I've been through for a few months. Because since I was a child, I've been more comfortable telling Neesha's sister.

Morning in a metropolitan city, with weather that is not much different from in Surabaya. But of course it is very different from in Yogyakarta. But I'm quite adaptable, because it's not the first time I've stayed in this big house. The house that once belonged to my sister's biological father, is now occupied by my sister and her husband. A comfortable home to contemplate, because it tends to be quiet.

I've been up since the early hours of this morning, as is my daily habit. Morning quiz by watering ornamental flower plants belonging to Brother Neesha in the backyard of the house. A garden located near a wooden house with a pond filled with ornamental fish, makes me feel at home to enjoy the sunlight covered in a fog of pollution.

I don't know how long I've been in this park, watering ornamental plants and feeding fish. Until Brother Neesha and brother Reyfan came in neat clothes. Looks like they're going to be traveling together this morning.

“Heat breakfast, Dek?” Sapa sister Neesha was so near me.

“It's Monday, Brother. Jenar fasting, insyaalloh.” My answer. For I am used to practicing sunna every Monday and Thursday, if there are no obstacles.

“Lho? Sahur didn't?” Ask Neesha again.

“Sahur. Together with Aunt Sri,” I gave a smile to my brother, even though I only ate bread and drank milk for sahur. I refused when aunt Sri offered me rice and side dishes. I used to eat only bread or even just drink milk and cereal, do not have to eat rice.

“Oh. Kira is not sahur. Can be scolded mother later brother, if you are here so skinny because of fasting but not sahur.” Seloroh kak Neesha's.

“Ha ha ha. Sister overrated.” My answer.

Brother Neesha and brother Reyfan chuckled. Honestly, I'm glad to see them like this. Friendly, intimate and romantic, really a matching couple. Although there are many differences between them, but if they are together like this, they make singles hurt by envy.

“Big brother Reyfan wants to go to work today. Are you okay being left at home alone? Or do you want to come with your sister to the studio?” Said my brother.

“True at home only, Brother. Afraid of ngrepotin if follow sister.” I smiled, as a sign that I was fine they stayed.

“But maybe sister came home late afternoon, Dek. All later want to see a doctor, check the womb,” said Brother Neesha.

Actually I was hesitant to reveal anything, that I had an appointment with a friend today. Worried that Brother Neesha wouldn't let me go. For Sister Neesha and father are equally protective of me. But if I don't tell you, then I have to cancel my promise, even though this meeting I've been waiting for a long time.

“Ehm... in fact Jenar has a friend's appointment today, Kak.” I saw Neesha's forehead frowning, waiting for the next sentence I was going to say.

Although in doubt, I still say I mean to Brother Neesha, “Jeral have a friend's appointment, want to go to the bookstore today.”

“Whose friend? Male or female? To which bookstore? Do you have friends in Jakarta?” Right, guys? Brother Neesha asked in detail, exactly like father.

“Teman Jenar's boy, Sister. But take it easy, he's not alone. He said he would take his sister later. He lives in Jogja, happens to be on vacation in Jakarta too, so we make an appointment, deh. Can you, just meet him, sister?” I explained in detail and honestly, because Brother Neesha can be very angry if there is one thing I cover.

“Oh! So this is the reason you rejected all the men who came, including Lion?” I can't believe that Neesha's sister has another thought, “so because you already have a boyfriend?”

Immediately I refuted my brother's words, because what he thought was wrong, “not, Brother. He's not my girlfriend, we're not dating. Sister knows for herself, dad forbid me to date.”

Brother Neesha smiled, but I read there was a question on her smile. Plus the words of brother Reyfan that make me embarrassed, “just let Jenar go, baby. He can take care of himself. After all, there is no harm in dating, the important thing is not to cross the line. Yeah, right, Jen?”

I have opened my mouth to answer Reyfan's words, but Neesha's sister Keburu said, “but Jenar must not go alone, Brother. This is Jakarta, not Surabaya or Jogja. Where can I let him go alone.”

“But, Kak-”

“Honey, Jenar is an adult. Give him a little freedom, don't get too restrained! Later he can not even develop, believe that Jenar can take care of himself and will not cross the line.”

I smiled at my sister and her husband. I can't believe Reyfan's little guy can be wise, too. And finally Brother Neesha let me go with Mr. Agus. Makes me relieved and happy, because later I can meet someone who managed to disturb my calm for several weeks.

***

If the fate line is like a paper, then the author is Alloh aza wa jalla. The contents of the paper, no one knows except Him. It can only be changed if God wills.

That's what happened today. I've reached the bookstore, where I made an appointment with my friend. A big, complete bookstore I've been to. On the top floor of this bookstore, I could see the highway traffic through the large glass window. I can also see the atmosphere under the shop through this glass window.

Makes me feel at home waiting for my friend to come, because I came too early. Enthusiasm for this meeting made me prepare and leave earlier than we had set out.

I picked up a book at random, I don't know what the title is. I had wanted to read a synopsis of the book, but it turned out that the traffic on the highway had disturbed me. It made me stare out the glass window, carrying the book.

The highway traffic was still on my eyes, as the baritone deheman's voice made me look back. I smiled as soon as I met someone's face. I immediately lowered my gaze and cupped both palms in front of my chest.

“Have a long wait?” Greet the man in front of me with his distinctive voice. Successfully made my chest rustle and my cheeks blush.

Men with a height of about 180 cm, the typical face of a Javanese man with a thin sideburns decorate the jaw to part of his cheeks. It was this guy who managed to make me unable to concentrate on anything lately. Ghufron Al - Ghazali. He's my college-level brother from another school, friends used to call him kang Ghufron.

“No. It's just, I came too early. No problem wait a minute.” I answered without looking at him.

I saw through the tail of my eyes he smiled, then grabbed the girl next to him. The girl's clothes were almost the same as mine. Loose glue with syar’i veil dangling almost cover the knee.

“ Introduce! This is my sister, Nalini her name is.”

I extended the hand that Nalini immediately greeted. We get acquainted politely, “assalamu’alaikum, Nalini. My name is Rinjani Jenar Adhitama, commonly called Jenar.”

“Wa’alaikum greetings, Jenar Mbak. Call me Nalini only.”

The three of us talked while looking at the collection of books on display in this store. Bookstore with big red G logo. One of the largest and most comprehensive bookstores in the metropolitan area, whose branches are spread in various regions.

So excited we chatted while choosing a book, I forgot that I came to this store escorted by assistant brother Reyfan. I left Mr. Hara alone, even though he had taken the time to pick me up and take me to this store. Also accompany me as long as the kang Ghufron and Nalini have not come.

I completely forgot I was with Mr. Hara. Too happy to meet and talk to Ghufron, I forgot about the others. This is the first time I have ever been able to speak directly with a Ghufron kang, even though there is a Nalini between us. But it's enough to make me happy, because usually I can only see it from afar. Talk only through chat whasapp or phone call only.

An unexpected advance, for I have admired the kang Ghufron since I first met. It is a figure like kang Ghufron that I hope to become my imam. A polite man with a good understanding of religion, so he can guide me into a better person. It could also be my place to ask about everything I don't understand. At once I can invite discussion about any problem, because kang Ghufron is a person who is comfortable to talk to.

Unlike Lion's brother who mostly just justify what I said. Or my other friends. Kang Ghufron is the right man to be my life partner.

This is just the beginning, the beginning of the meeting. Although Ghufron kang has not said anything to me, but my hope is that he also has the same taste for me. The taste I've been harboring for months. The feeling I'm holding because I'm just a woman who doesn't want to look aggressive. Do not want to embarrass yourself by expressing love first to a man. What if it gets rejected?

Although actually today it is common for a woman to declare love for a man, but for me it is taboo. Let me be with this iniquity, let me be with this ancient understanding. Because everyone has their own understanding and attitude.

Mr. Hara faithfully followed me with the kang Ghufron and Nalini until Neesha's brother and Reyfan's brother came to pick me up. I introduced Ghufron to my brother, I never thought what Ghufron's kang said made me want to borrow a doraemon's diminutive flashlight.

"Mbak, mum. Sorry, I'm honestly interested in Jenar. If he's willing let me introduce my parents. We can ta'aruf first, insyaalloh until I graduate next year. After that I want to preach it. Hope you don't mind."

The long sentence uttered by kang Ghufron made Neesha's brother and Reyfan's brother look at each other. They must not have expected Ghufron's kang to come clean so soon.

.

.

.

Seriate....

Happy feast day eid al-fitri friends all .. apologize born and inward😍