Tidying Up Asa, Inviting Hidayah

116. Turning Point

🌵Not the wrong love, but the tendency of unstoppable desire can be precisely messing up all neatly arranged plans.🌵

The sky above the large joglo house looks clean. The yellowish tinge slowly dissipated, indicating the sun had set behind the contest. The atmosphere was quite calm, as calm as a gust of wind that did not disturb the leaves. Even the night beast only sounded softly, as if all creatures were living at the turn of the day.

Hara got out of the car while throwing cigarette butts on the ground. He took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly. Many times he relaxes to neutralize irregular heartbeat.

Slowly he reached into the jacket pocket, taking out a small bottle filled with a brownish-colored liquid. He downed the contents of the bottle slightly, frowning, feeling the sensation of the influence as the drink went down the throat. Hara was silent for a moment, waiting for the pseudo calm reaction of the drink to her brain. After that, he put the small bottle back in his pocket, then walked towards the bright joglo house because all the lights had been lit.

He paused for a moment in front of the tightly shut brown-typical wooden door. Hara's hand was raised, about to knock. However, when he heard the half-raspy voice chanting the holy verse from the right hand room, he undoes the intention. He then changed the direction of the step, approaching the room which is a new building renovated some time ago.

Hara stopped right in front of the open wooden window, she leaned her body away into the room. Seemed a man was reading the scriptures solemnly, although stammered even occasionally stopped, but the voice was quite soothing.

Hara turned around, shifted slightly from the window frame, then leaned back against the wooden wall. He took out a cigarette from his jacket pocket, immediately ignited it. While closing his eyes, he enjoyed every suction while listening to the soft and clean voice of Irkham who was teaching. A calm atmosphere, no doubt presents the peace of feeling that had been confused.

Shortly after, the door that was located not far from where Hara was standing opened from within. The wooden door that was the entrance from the back of the house, creaked. After that appeared a woman who wore a hoodie jacket of gray color combined with a black shirt hijab. Sipping on the scent of the drink in the carried cup, the girl walked through the door. So excited to enjoy the aroma of drinks that emanate from the puff of hot steam, Jenar was not aware of the presence of Hara. He leisurely headed to the gazebo on the left, closest to the main house.

Then put a cup of hot coffee, then go up to the gazebo. While leaning against the bamboo pole, the girl straightened her legs, then muttered asmaul husna softly. He spread his gaze to all directions and came to a halt in front of the room where all the walls were made of wood. A long gust of breath sounded from her nose, as she saw the figure of Hara standing there. It comes to mind about the events of last night, the expression of love that made her cry all night until almost morning.

A faint smile fell on Hara's lips, when inadvertently her eyes met with Jenar's sharp brownish bead. Just for a moment, but able to shake the heart that he painstakingly strengthened. Taking a deep breath, the man moved, leaving a sweet voice that almost made him fall asleep. He walked up to the girl who managed to make him unable to sleep all night, even having seized his senses. All day only the face of this girl is in the mind, until it is impatient to want to meet soon. He wanted to know what Jenar's reaction to his love expression was, after last night the girl just left him to go into the house.

“Hai!” just this time Hara greeted someone on a pleasant basis, because she had not found the right words to start a conversation.

Jenar did not answer, just pulled a leg, then crossed it. Seeing that Hara rubbed her nape, feeling really awkward. The man sat on the edge of the gazebo, deliberately forming a distance with Jenar. He looked up, looking at the sky that still left a little tinge of sunlight, not yet completely dark.

For a few minutes, none of the two made a sound. They were silent, immersed in each other's thoughts. There are many things that Hara wants to say, but is confused about where to start. While Jenar has no intention of opening the conversation, she is still too surprised by Hara's love statement last night. He doesn't know what to do with that guy right now.

Hara took a pack of cigarettes and a match from her pants pocket, picked up a stick, then slipped it between her index and middle fingers. He looked towards Jenar before lighting a cigarette. The girl looked calm with lips constantly moving, like a person who was muttering without a sound. For a moment Hara was silent, watching Jenar while playing a cigarette with fingers. That's when an idea to start a conversation comes to mind.

Hara cleared her throat before opening her voice, intending to attract Jenar's attention. “I'm fine smoking here?” hara asked pleasantly after seeing Jenar turn her head towards her.

Jenar nodded without an answer. Make Hara take a deep breath, then exhale slowly.

“You don't mind me smoking here?” Hara repeated the question, “Perhaps you are uncomfortable with cigarette smoke.”

Jenar frowned, said ketus without looking at Hara, “Smoking only, no need to ask if I object or not. Isn't that usually the case?”

Hara smiled faintly, Jenar's attitude was very different from usual. The girl who used to be calm, is now sniffling. It's definitely due to her love last night.

“You're angry with me?” Hara stopped lighting a cigarette, choosing to start opening the conversation even though Jenar's attitude was not pleasant.

Jenar took the cup, inhaled the aroma of coffee that went out for a moment, then took a sip.

“On last night I-” Hara stared intensely at Jenar before continuing her sentence.

Jenar took a breath, playing a finger on the lip of the cup filled with coffee. The girl looked at Hara for a moment just to guess the man's continued sentence, “Father would like to apologize about last night?”

Hara nodded, not dismissing Jenar's guess. It made Jenar smile knot, what she expected turned out to be true.

“I guessed it, surely last night Mr. Hara was drunk. So you can't control what you say. Aye, right? Just like now, Mr. Hara also-” Jenar deliberately hangs his words.

“Drunk? Who's drunk?” Hara scrunched her forehead.

Jenar did not answer, instead cupping the cup with both hands, then sipping the coffee calmly. Meanwhile, Hara looked at the girl beside her while thinking.

“You thought I was under the influence of alcohol last night, when I expressed love to you?” ask Hara as soon as her mind conicals.

Jenar nodded, still cupping a cup of coffee that felt warm in the palm of her hand.

“Makanya earlier Mr. Hara apologized, for fear I misunderstood, right?” Jenar glanced at Hara at a glance before giving a statement, “Quietly, sir. I wouldn't misunderstand, though. Let's just say last night nothing happened.”

Hara frowned deeper, then let out a rough breath.

“That's how you can forget a man's expression of love, Jen? Though for me, last night was the first event in life that will never be forgotten.” said Hara ended with a smile.

Jenar fluttered, as if Hara's words were only considered as a past wind.

“Originally you know, now or last night, I am not drunk. When expressing love to you, I am in a hundred percent conscious state.” continued Hara with great emphasis.

Jenar shrinks, “Breaths the smell of alcohol like this, still do not want to admit that you are drunk.”

“Now I've had a drink, but last night I didn't. You need to know again, not everyone who drinks alcohol can get drunk. A small bottle of wine will not make me lose my mind.” said Hara who heard Jenar's words.

Jenar sighed, then cast a distant glance forward through the bamboo tree grove. The expanse of rice fields was faintly visible under the bright light of the full moon. Flickering lights from a distance look like a sprinkling of stars dotting the mountain merapi and merbabu. The night with a calm atmosphere, incompatible with the roar that sounded from the heart of the girl dimpled on both sides of her cheeks.

Hara took out a small bottle from her jacket pocket, a vertical drink to dampen any emotions that swirled in the mind. Although he is not a drunk who always solves problems with alcohol, but it cannot be denied if the drink can always make him calmer.

“Actually I came to ask for an answer,” said Hara after closing a bottle that had been empty because the contents were drunk.

“Answers?” Jenar repeated Hara's question without looking at the man.

“If I can guess, but still want to hear a direct answer from you,” Hara glanced at the girl who was solemnly staring at the night view.

“Means?” Jenar turned to the right side with a frown.

“You also have the same feeling as me, right?” guess Hara directly.

Jenar clucked, again changing his gaze towards the front. It made Hara smile triumphantly.

“No need to dodge, confess!” hara's orders.

“Sok knows,” Jenar shrinks, then lifts the cup with one hand. The girl needs to sip coffee to relieve a heartbeat that starts to stomp fast due to Hara's guess on target.

“Come, Jen! It is impossible for God to arrange our meeting and togetherness like this, if He has no plan.” Hara said sarcas.

“Not a single human being knows about God's plan, Sir.” replied Jenar ketus.

Hara took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly. The smell of alcohol wafted, making Jenar sontan lift the cup closer to her nose.

“Whatever you say to evade, for sure I already know if our feelings are the same. It is up to you, want to respond to what our relationship is like, Hara” also floated forward, the same scenery as seen by Jenar.

“What should I behave like? Mr Hara thinks after this, our relationship will be different so?” ask Jenar.

“It sure. How can our relationship remain ordinary, while both know about the feelings stored in the heart?"

Jenar smiled small, “Don't expect much, sir. Nothing will change between us.”

Hara turned her head quickly, wanting to look for any doubts implied on Jenar's face. However, the girl remained unmoved without changing the direction of view. As if too sure of his words.

“I don't want to get caught up in a momentary feeling that will actually mislead,” Jenar took a breath, turned to the side for a moment, then looked down.

“So you think I'm messing around, Jen? You think my feelings for you aren't real? That expression of love is just a small talk?” Hara tilted her head, waiting for Jenar's answer.

Jenar nodded weakly. As a second child who was very dear to the family, of course he did not easily believe in the sweet mouth of a man. Especially after failing to get married, he has set his heart to not easily fall in love with just any man.

“How do I prove my sincerity?” tanya Hara really wanted to know.

Jenar shrugged, she herself did not know what a man should do to convince her heart.

Hara. Just this time he felt it was difficult to communicate seriously with a girl. It turned out that after struggling to express love, he did not immediately get the answer as expected. All unexpectedly, love affairs turned out to be more complicated than even the most complicated work affairs.

“It was night, it was better for Mr. Hara to go home.” said Jenar suddenly, after he and Hara just kept quiet.

“Wah! Already dare to ngusir, nih.” grumbled Hara, cut off the view from the clear night sky.

“Not mean ngusir, but Mr. Hara who should know himself.” ketus Jenar.

“I am a guest, you know. Not offered to drink, made coffee or tea that, instead expelled.” Hara is back to grumbling.

Jenar snorted, “Since when should I offer a drink to a person who at any time can come uninvited?”

Hara immediately stopped the laughter. Jenar was enjoying coffee. In his heart he was deep, only this first time he met a girl who managed to make his heart rustle. Want to linger sitting next to him and tracing every inch of the girl's sweet face.

“Turned home instead seein me,” cetus Jenar.

“The coffee seems really good,” said Hara spontaneously.

"Want? Just the garbage, here!" Jenar thrust a cup at Hara.

Hara smiled meaningfully, "No intention of making a new one? Let me take a longer look at your pretty face," Hara said without taking a look from Jenar.

Jenar widened her eyes, then lowered her head to hide her face that was blushing to hear Hara's expression.

“Feelings first time you wear SMA uniform is not as beautiful as this, deh. Now it looks different, what is because-” Hara has not been able to continue the sentence, when Jenar closed her mouth sign was holding back laughter.

“Nevent need to follow the rubber, mending to darken the window glass only.” said Jenar after being able to control mixed feelings.

“I mean darken your room window glass, while looking at you that way, yes?” hara replied while moving her eyebrows.

“Alloh! It's a real drunk guy like that. Tomorrow again if you want to come here not while drinking alcohol, let's not be weird gini." Jenar.

“Know that I am drunk again your love,” Hara is getting out of control, out of nowhere he got a vocabulary that he has never spoken.

Jenar pulls Hara jacket part sleeve while standing, “Just go home, deh. Before Mr. Hara fell. I don't want to, yes, Mr. Hara passed out here because of a hangover.”

“Why, anyway, would you like me to go home? Afraid to be caught if you are also in love with me, huh?” Hara put her head closer to Jenar.

Spontaneous Jenar shifts her seat while pulling the hijab to cover her nose, not liking the smell of alcohol coming out of the man's mouth. Hara immediately withdrew, aware of Jenar's attitude. He momentarily forgot, if the girl beside him did not like the smell of alcohol.

“I'll be home, but you have to answer one question first.” Hara pointed her index finger.

“OK, what question?” Jenar was hopefully anxious about the question Hara was going to ask, but she tried to calm down.

“Just one! What is our relationship now, boyfriend, lover, or partner? I want answers other than friends.”

Silent moment. Hara tries hard to control the heartbeat that is too tight, while Jenar is thinking of a reasonable answer to Hara's question.

“Pak Hara won't be friends with me?” jenar asked pleasantries, even though she already knew the answer from Hara's attitude.

Hara shook her head, “If I just wanted to be friends with you, tonight I wouldn't have come here. Answer that! So that I can determine the next attitude.”

“Good. I will answer, but Mr. Hara must accept whatever my answer is.” said Jenar.

“Oke.” Hara straightened up, waiting impatiently.

“Our relationship now, tomorrow and next is .. habluminannass!” answer Jenar by emphasizing the last word.

Hara frowned, not knowing what Jenar meant. He was just about to ask a question, but Jenar had moved on. The girl got off the gazebo, then put on her sandals in a hurry.

“Because I answered, so Mr. Hara should go home now!” cetus Jenar's.

Hara stood up, pulling on Jenar's hand before the girl stepped away.

“Wait! I'm not satisfied with your answer, what does that mean?” ask Hara seriously.

“Try Mr. Hara find it yourself, or can ask Gus Hafidz.” replied Jenar while throwing Hara's hand that holds her wrist.

Hara took off Jenar's hand, but shifting her body prevented the girl from leaving.

“Truly my peeper comes home?” challenge Hara.

“Abviously I look like I'm joking?” Challenging response.

“Let's see how?” Hara lowered her eyebrows.

Genar chuckles, “Don't wander, I won't miss.”

“If I miss?” Hara asked for change.

“That's father's business, not mine.” replied Jenar firmly.

“How about you make me coffee first, so I can go home quietly. At least there is a taste of coffee left behind, other than your face that I can only imagine.” Hara urges.

Genar again laughed a little, “This is why so smart gombal gini, anyway? It's home!”

Jenar was about to step up, but Hara prevented it again.

“There are other ways that I can enjoy your coffee.”

Jenar frowned, which Hara said was getting weird. The man suddenly brought the face closer, poking at Jenar's lips without warning. It was only about two seconds, but it managed to make his heart burst. He felt he had the world to his side, with vast green meadows and blooming flowers. For the first time, he felt immeasurably happy after kissing a girl.

If Hara feels very happy, it is not the same as Jenar. The girl was very surprised to get a spontaneous kiss from Hara. His heart was pounding, blood flow felt fast, his entire body warmed over time into heat. He also had difficulty regulating roaring breaths, making his hand holding the cup tremor.

“Your coffee is good, even though I just tasted it a little.” Hara said while licking her own lips.

Jenar was inflamed, anger was peaking inside her chest. He raised his trembling hand, slapping a hard slap on Hara's cheek. Not only that, he also poured the remaining coffee grounds on the face of the man who had been insolent to him.

Hara did not expect to get a coffee pulp flush and a slap from Jenar. He rubbed his face, getting angry. He saw that Jenar was walking backwards while breathing. The empty cup that Jenar had originally held had fallen to the ground. At that moment, he realized something.

“True?” call Hara to the girl who is holding her own head.

Jenar did not answer, just continued to walk backwards. The girl began to be unable to control herself, she continued to shake her head, her eyes had runny. Just as Hara took two steps forward, Jenar had run off the ridge into the house.

“True!” hara shouted, then chased after Jenar.

The sound of the door closing violently, rang out loud as Hara entered the house from the back door. The man followed the direction of the sound source, approaching a room. Hara stood in front of the room door, waited for a moment, then knocked on the door.

“True? You're inside? Answer me!” exciting Hara.

There was no answer from inside the room, until Hara repeated knocking on the door again. However, until several beats there remains no answer. Hara stopped knocking, then brought her ear closer to the tightly closed door. I faintly heard sobs from inside. The voice that made him more aware, that he had made a very fatal mistake.

Hara exhaled while turning her back, then leaned back on the door leaf. The atmosphere suddenly felt very quiet, so that the sobs that had only sounded vague now became clearer.

“I'm sorry ...,” said Hara exclaimed, almost sounding just to herself.

For a while Hara was speechless, she was well aware that what she was doing had injured Jenar. The sobs that sounded from behind the door of the room, felt like a heart-wrenching pain. The feeling that had been filled with colorful flowers bloomed, now withered instantly.

“I know you are very angry, but can we talk for a minute?” hara broke the silence.

“I just want to know how you are. I need to make sure you are okay,” continued Hara.

However, there was still no answer from inside the room. The silence is more dominant, the pain is increasingly felt in the heart, as if the sembilu deeper stabbing the heart. There was nothing else Hara could do, other than wait for Jenar to open the door that seemed impossible. The girl was definitely very disappointed because of Hara's treatment. A philandering that ruins everything, a thoughtless act that disrupts all plans. Now all that remains is a sense of disappointment, whether he can still improve the situation, or even add to the relationship.

The sound of footsteps rang out, making Hara raise her head. It appeared a male figure standing before him with an indecipherable facial expression. The man said quietly to Hara, “Bali wae sak durunge Mas Faiz karo Mbak Nanda rene."*

...***...

*Just go home, before Mas Faiz and Mbak nanda come.

Assalamu'alaikum temen-temen, long time no see, huh? May all participants always be given health, safety, and smooth windfall barokah aamiin.

Still a mood, huh? Let me apologize to my inner birth for any mistakes, mistakes, unrequited chat, ignored comments and all whether I was intentionally or not.

Thank you for waiting for the follow-up chapter of this story, even though I often disappear without kata😁. All unintentional, only impossible situations and conditions, please forgive. 🙏

Happy eid al-fitri 1444H, taqoballohu minna wa minkum, taqobal ya karim.

Who is still in his hometown, enjoy the holidays. Later if the heart2 back on the road. Who has been active, hopefully given smoothness. May we all always be in the protection of Allah, Aamiin.