The Malang Widow

Conditional Marriage Part II

How happy my mother felt when I confirmed her desire to marry Deri. Some days we prepare the administration for the purposes of marriage has started to run one by one.

We decided to go to Lampung the night before the ijab qobul event which will be held tomorrow night ba'da Isya. Although it is quite mepet, but there is still a day for me to rest at home before we perform ijab qobul. Because at dawn we usually landed in our hometown.

Using the bus that we used to ride every time we went home, Deri and I did not sit next to each other. We deliberately ordered tickets with the front seat number back, so as not to sit in rows that allow us to coincide with each other.

There was anxiety in my heart leaving Uwais without my arms. My hope is that he's not fussy in the current Ferdi Istrin treatment. My heart did not stop beating so fast imagining the procession of my ijab qobulku with a Deri. Well, however, he is the one I have dreamed of becoming my companion since long ago, even though my heart still holds pain to him.

At 02.00 WIB in the morning, we entered a Fery Ship at the Merak port crossing to Bakauheni. As usual, all passengers got on board. Some were resting in the room, some were on the edge of the fence staring at the blackened sea without that light.

Likewise with Kami, either me or Deri stood leaning on the edge of the fence to enjoy the cool morning air, accompanied by the pounding waves roaring each other like the contents of our hearts today.

Deri and I stared at each other silently towards the sky waiting for dawn to come from the eastern horizon. Every now and then he and I looked at each other, and he also threw me a very big smile several times, even though I was just a bit sambar with my wry smile, but he seemed to still sparkle with a joy that seemed as if in a matter of hours he would soon have me.

As dawn approached, we reached our homes. Deri and I didn't go down at the same location point, because my house was first passed by a bus that drove at high speed compared to the house of Deri which still had to be reached by the invitation of his parents because his house did not get through the bus route.

Arriving at my house, I was greeted by my mother and also some of my family who had gathered in my house to prepare my wedding which was fairly simple. I really want my marriage to be done simply without the frills of a party like when I was first married to my ex-husband.

All day I waited, it was time for night to come. After performing the Isya Prayer, I wear my robe which was bought by Deri the other day. Some lace adorned each end of the stitches of the long white dress, until my body looked beautiful wrapped. Thin makeup I use without the help of a salon like people want to get married. All I do myself to decorate myself.

In front of the mirror, I turned around a few times. Feelings of anxiety began to collide in my heart that made me even more chaotic and cooled every finger of mine.

"Assalamu'alaikum....?" the sound of the bridal party seemed in unison began to enter my living room which had been prepared for the procession ijab qobul.

"Walaikumsalam.." said my family who was no less in unison.

The ijaq qobul procession begins. I was sitting on my bed waiting for a call when a legitimate statement was made and was ceaselessly squeezing my fingers cold. Until a moment it sounded loud.

"I received his marriage and marriage, Niandari Binti Santoso with a dowry of one million rupiah paid in cash" deri's voice that immediately tense the whole of my house that night was heard until the tears of the women who were here also flooded the procession full of haru.

"How's witness?" said Mr. Penghulu.

"Well... legitimate.." boisterous voice of the whole family welcomed this strand of sacredness ijab qobul.

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Instantly in Ferdi's lap, Uwais cried loudly. The milk that I milked I had prepared for him also seemed unable to stem his broken cry as if hinting at the happiness of his parents' union.

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Shortly after the legal declaration, my mother picked me up in the room. He handed me over to Deri with a few glances that were then directed towards me and Deri. I welcomed his right hand, and I kissed Takzim. Instantly he kissed my forehead gently, filled with the envy of almost everyone who was there at the time.

My struggling heart longs for me to be a full-fledged wife and serve her. But at once my ego was turbulent to refuse to continue to punish my pain in Deri.

After the procession was over and the whole family went back to their homes and appeared lonely in my house. Now comes my first night as a married couple between me and Deri.

My heart felt like it was going to fall when I saw him enter my room and was going to sleep with me. Although in agreement I do not want to sleep with him, but whatever the power, at home I have to play a role as if I serve my husband for fear of being caught by my mother.

Nervously, Deri slowly slept on my bed lined up with me. We kept quiet and stared at the ceiling. Deri seems to want to start a journey of love like you are a newly married wife. But he did not want to renege on his promise to me, until he also tried to resist the movement of his deadly weapons that continued to harden.

Instantly I remembered the disgusting behavior of Deri to me first. The shadow of Deri while fondling me outside was spontaneous making me want to cry and scream. But I tried to hold back, until I turned my back to Deri.

Deri seemed to let out a long sigh, at once she also turned her back to my body by tilting her body in the opposite direction to me. In the end, we each fell asleep.

"Flower.." a soft voice whispered in my ear and spontaneously made me wake up and startle.

I rubbed my eyes several times looking at the face of Deri who seemed to not believe she slept with me one room. When I remembered that last night we had done ijab qobul, I finally calmed down.

The sound of the dawn Adhan was reverberating, apparently the whisper had awakened me to perform the Fajr Prayer. I rushed down from my bed to get water. While Deri seemed to step out of the room and towards the mosque to perform congregational prayers.

My heart was so amazed to see it. It was beyond his guilt to me, now he is a man of his dreams as a husband to me.

I started packing my things this morning. Deri and I decided to go to Jakarta right now, considering that I was always thinking about Uwais.

After I had breakfast with Deri and my mother, we talked for a while to just let go of my long-time homesickness to my long-time mother. Shortly after that, we went back to Jakarta.