We, Without Me

Logic and a Shaky Heart

“I told Mama, Papa, if you go straight home.” Keven said flatly as if he did not care, but the corner of his tail tried to catch Yuki's response who felt at home speechless.

“You eat?” Keven asked, hoping that a word could come out of his fussy lips that were tightly clenched. Not without reason Keven wished for Yuki to make a sound, Yuki's blank eyes really made Keven worried.

Whether consciously or not, Keven gripped tightly at the steering wheel of his car. He channeled his anger at the disappointment he could not let go of.

If during the trip to pick up Yuki he really wanted to directly scold Yuki when the two were met, then at this time all of that disappeared with pity. Keven is well aware of the real reason Yuki escaped by meeting his parents. However, instead of the calm that Yuki had obtained, it was precisely his broken heart that was getting crushed.

Trying to position herself as Yuki, now the man who focused his eyes straight ahead cursed every sentence he said to denigrate Yuki. Repeatedly he regretted, but foolishly repeatedly Keven unconsciously repeated his mistake.

Keven who always glorified, guarded and protected Mama Agni consciously and without coercion freed a string of sharp sentences deliberately intended to hurt Yuki. Everything is no more for the sake of venting resentment and anger which is certainly not due to Yuki's fault.

Regretted? Hugely.

One of them Keven deeply regretted choosing not to directly contact Yuki's parents. His demeanor that belittled Yuki's departure also caused a strange pain in the chest that was not clear of her origin.

To be honest, Keven seemed to be at a crossroads with no clear goals and desires. It is undeniable that staying at the roof makes Keven accustomed to the presence of Yuki. Attention, laughter, even the shrill sound that made him upset really gave a new color.

At this moment Keven wanted to hold Yuki, but he was too afraid if one day the grip that was intended to protect it turned like a poison that killed slowly. Logic and a wobbly heart are too afraid to take a step that has not been confirmed.

Picking his car to the left side of the road right in front of a small shop, Keven circled the car leaving Yuki still in his daydreams.

Choosing a random variety of sugary snacks as well as an ion-enhancing cold drink, Keven immediately returned to his car. The sight before his eyes was clearly still the same, the pensive Yuki with a soul that seemed to be increasingly hiding in an invisible corner.

“Drink!” Pouring a bottle of bottled water, Keven sighed desperately at Yuki's silent attitude. Grabbing Yuki's weakly drooping hand, Keven once again forced Yuki to take a small sip of drinking water even if it was just wetting the tip of the tongue.

“Why is everything fake?” Yuki asked suddenly, her eyes still fixed on the void in front of her. His soul seemed to vanish sucked into a painful reality that made his heart scratched bitterly. A drop of tears flowed freely, shedding soaked both sides of the cheeks that looked more slender than the last time Keven noticed it.

“Since when has my life been this ruined? Ha ha ha.. Since when did everything become a charade!? Hix.. I don't want to sleep on. It's all a dream. It's a dream, right?” Yuki asked again whether it was intended for Keven or himself. But the hollow laughter that disguised the sobbing was very audibly clear knocking on Keven's eardrum.

Yuki's sound waves successfully blocked the air trying to break out of Keven's lung cavity. Cuddled and held Yuki until the tiny face was drowned in the chest of his field. The sobs that turned into roars seemed to be silenced by Keven's field chest. Crying innocently, tongue muddy with breath choked and shoulders shaken, Yuki beat Keven's back in his arms.

“Ken-nah-pahh's chat.. Ken-na-paah..!?” Yuki said hysterically in a stammering voice because of the cry she did not want to stop at all. Yuki hated her life. Yuki is fed up with the fact that everything he is going through is just a falsehood.

“Sorry.” Keven said softly, whispering right in Yuki's earlobe. The gentle rubbing on her back actually made Yuki cry a mouthful.

Yuki's memory goes back to the past when she was once unconscious due to illness. The apology from Keven's lips was only a hallucination to him. Yuki was afraid that if he opened his eyes this time Keven would return cold. Yuki obviously would not be able to bear her pain if she had to be injured again.

As much as Yuki's energy tried to hit the sharp chunks that squeezed and scratched repeatedly until his consciousness disappeared. Lack of eating, lack of drinking, lack of sleep and stress make Yuki lose a lot of energy until fainting is not spared. The weakly drooping hands and rough banging jolted Keven who immediately raised Yuki's closed face.

Be grateful Keven to Mama Agni who likes to fuss so that she always put wind oil in the car. He said just in case if dizziness and nausea suddenly hit. Now the carelessness of Mama Agni really makes Keven a little able to pass a breath that seems reluctant to meet the air in the amazing nature.

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“Eugh.” Yuki's small moans and movements startled Keven who was almost asleep in a sitting position cross-legged grasping Yuki's fingers.

“Udah wake up?” Keven asked as he gently stroked the back of Yuki's hand. The tone of his voice does sound flat and ordinary, but know that a thin smile that is hastily hidden is a small form of happiness.

“This?” Grazing slowly in confusion, Yuki circulated her gaze without moving her head, only pupils of eyes going around. Yuki was still unconscious at the finger link which miraculously warmed the body that was lying helplessly on the bed.

“We're at home.” Said Keven with one hand outstretched that was about to tidy up Yuki's messy hair. For more than three hours Yuki was unconscious.

Chequek.

“You're awake, Ki? Why go home your parents didn't tell Mama? Where does it hurt? Dizziness? Nausea?” Mama Agni's voice that suddenly interrupted instantly made Keven aghast and reflexively released his grip on Yuki's fingers. While Mama Agni who leaned the question ran in a hurry while finishing all the sentences of the question.

“Ma.. ask one by one.” Said Keven to Mama Agni while looking at Yuki who was still digesting the situation as to what was going on.

“You made Mama very worried tau.” Say Mama Agni again without commenting on Keven's words.

“He's still not fully aware, Ma. Don't ask questions first.” Now Papa Leigh interjected while pulling Mama Agni's shoulder slightly away.

Choosing to give space to the young couple, Papa Leigh with all her tricks managed to bring Mama Agni out of the room. He realized that this moment could be an opportunity for his son-in-law to get the true affection of Keven. Although often indifferent and ketus, Papa Leigh understands Keven who actually has a sweet side wrapped in prestige.

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Anyone want an encouraging message for Yuki? Or does anyone have a pearl word for Keven?😄

Thank you for following Yuki's story so far🥰