We, Without Me

We were?

“Why new now, Ma? I don't think Mama wants to see me again."

Stunned, Mama Maria's heart slammed. Once again a fact shook his selfishness. Yuki's soft voice that sounded faint as if justifying Keven's speech a month ago when several times came to him.

There is no one who does not escape error. They all hurt Yuki, and even Yuki herself unknowingly hurt her.

While Mama Maria, because of the deep heartache of Papa Gibran, he instead poured anger on Yuki. Destroying a child who is always pampered. Abandoning all obligations of pity with an alibi has atoned for sins for continuing to fulfill responsibilities in material terms.

Mama Maria cupped Yuki's sad face. “Hey, Mama's beautiful son .. never once did Mama think that. You're Mama's son. My only pride. Mama was wrong all this time more concerned with following your Papa. Mama is also wrong because after knowing your father cheated on you instead of behaving like a parent for you.”

Yuki's inching backwards. His hands hang as if unwilling to break Mama Maria's embrace. “Don't I just make Mama's heartache grow? I look like Papa, don't I? My face, my attitude, my birthmark on this body are also the foods we like. Mama must have gotten hurt more every time I saw her. That's why I don't care if you deliberately don't take much time for me. I was angry and disappointed, why did I get hurt? But it's okay, I understand."

‘Yeah Yuki .. sorry Mama, Son. The wrong mom has been alone all this time. Mama was wrong, son .. Stupid Mama even breathed a sigh of relief you married people. You close your eyes to what you really want. Though the household Mama also failed.’

Yuki Nanar's gaze, her eyes glazed over. For a moment he hurriedly looked up so that the tears did not spill over his face. Clenching hands restrains overflowing emotions. But as powerful as anything Yuki can not deny very, very stifling chest understand the mother's sincerity.

At that time, Yuki only needed a hug when she was fragile.

"I'm a big man too, Ma. I can take care of myself. So Mama don't feel guilty or think about me anymore. Sorry .. I can't figure out what Mama wants. Not because I don't want to come with Mama, but my job there is a responsibility I have to finish.” Yuki's smile while grabbing the fragile hand of the woman in front of her.

“Originally Mama know, I'm not spoiled. Even during the same marriage Mas Keven I can cook, help take care of the house, no longer need Aunty. I'm independent, Ma. This is real, I swear!” yuki's words were paused by the two-finger gesture of peace.

"Now I want you to be happy with your choice. Forget about Papa being happy with his family. It all happened, we can't change it anymore. Even though I was not happy before. Disappointed because you are not honest. But Mama Papa remains my light source. Because of you I can stand here to be a star to myself. I'm fine, Ma. Ak-”

Yuki's sentence was broken. Breath snorted. The air supply in the lungs has been exhausted. But Yuki still developed a smile as if she was completely fine. Unfortunately all of it was incompatible with the sound that shook bitterly.

But certainly there is no hatred in the eyes of Yuki, both for Mama Maria and Papa Gibran. Although still vividly painted in Yuki's memory, the image of Mama Maria's anger and Papa's laughter with a toddler. Surely all of it is mixed with the echo of the stoning sounds of the heart that is still often buzzing in Yuki's ears.

“Udah yuk, Ma, out. Later the occupants of the toilet baper see we melow.” Yuki rubbed her wet eyelids. Patting gently the eye bag area with the index finger to feel relaxed.

"Hush! By the way!" reprimand Mama Maria.

"Hehe," Yuki's grim butts.

A second later Yuki turned around staring at the reflection of her face in the mirror. He was shocked to find a hue that was really like a rotten tomato. Then washed the face of the damp while removing snot, freeing thick blockages in the nasal cavity.

"Well, you're like that? Want to be the doorkeeper?" yuki's chirping was somewhat shocked at Keven who was standing one and a half meters away from the doorway of the female-only toilet. The man glimpsed a creepy look with a glare of sharp eyes that stared intensely in one direction, of course the toilet door.

"You ...," said Keven when Mama Maria came out of the toilet. "Let's go. Your ship just arrived."

Plaque.

"Drink this." Keven stood on Yuki's right side. He holds a white crackle bag on his left hand, while his right hand holds a sealed glass bottle. He was preparing to let go of Yuki.

"Pain relief?" yuki said with her eyebrows raised. Spelling the two written words from the container is not foreign because it is often bought when he comes the moon.

"Your stomach needs to be compressed? Can I bring you some warm water with a little towel or a koyo?" ask Keven to make sure. He also thrusts the bag of crackles brought to Yuki.

Shuffling in response, Yuki without being ruled had already grabbed the pouch that Keven thrust. Check the contents carefully. Occasionally glanced at Keven with a flickering search. "Brown? Let me not be emotional?" guess Yuki's origin, but instead embraced spontaneously by Keven.

Chuckling with a million flavors, Yuki suddenly looked back. There is Mama Maria who is seen checking Yuki's luggage while busy receiving phone calls. The old woman was clearly troubled by the job that was suddenly left behind.

“Looking at your current attitude feels exactly like the first time we met," Yuki recalled with a bland smile. His eyes glared far at the old glint. A little splashing happiness tickles the recesses of the heart.

“Means?”

“You who look cute turns out attention, very good. Anyone can definitely baper and want to have your kayak partner.”

“If you ... would you like to have a partner like me?”

“Iya, first. I really, really want to. But not at our first meeting." Yuki's voice sounded convinced. He breathed a strong breath. Throwing a glance at the people who one by one walk in tandem in the passenger arrivals hallway.

"You didn't forget how embarrassed I was to chase you? No day without a glance and seek attention .. yes even if you are also yesterday tomorrow I still repeat again. Strangely when you rent I'm even happy. I feel like I got your attention."

"If now?" Keven bit the inside of his lower lip. He breathed uneasyly waiting for Yuki's reply who was momentarily silent.

"While I asked,” Yuki replied casually, her honesty sounded light, but it had a big impact on Keven.

“Ka-you se-rius?” asked Keven with sparkling eyes. His heart beat almost three times faster. Lucky is not a sudden heart attack.

Yuki nodded. “Hmm .. can I be with you again? Can I really be happy? Because just laughing together is not our top priority right now, right?”

Yuki. Gifts an unexpected looking gaze. Even so his hand gripped tightly the bag of crackle giving Keven.

To be honest, Yuki was afraid of repeating the same story in the old sheet. Because in fact Yuki has not closed the book on their story. Not yet managed to get out of a feeling that cannot be eliminated.

Keven's shadow often haunts. But it was great never to hurt Yuki. He was actually happy for the presence of Keven even though it was a dream. Perhaps true, he is not blind love, but too stupid of his love.

“Kita?” lirih Keven with a big smile. His breath was broken because it was too filled with happiness. Though only a word ‘kita’ that he repeated from the words of Yuki.

“Iya, we,” Keven continued while putting on a happy expression that was no less reassuring.