The Monster In Me

Crack

It turns out that what others have been saying is true. Karsa and Evan are too different to make a friendship. Each of them was too selfish to understand each other.

Karsa always assume that a difference is what actually makes their friendship tighter. Without knowing that all this time Evan was only too good to tolerate the attitude of Karsa that he did not like. Although in fact, the reason for hating Karsa is piling up as time goes on.

They have spent a lot of time together. Starting from ordinary things such as visiting each other to breaking school rules to just go to the food stalls because they are bored with the canteen menu. Karsa still remembers how Evan had to drain his memory to bring them back to school just because Karsa forgot the path they had been on.

Karsa thought, every memory with Evan that he thought was beautiful, can also make Evan smile every time he remembered. But the truth is not. Everything changed when they were just about to enter the holiday period after undergoing the Junior High National Examination.

“You're just a lazy young man. Live life just for fun,” said Evan while clenching both hands on the side of the body. “Because born handsome, you think you will get everything you. I see, right?”

Karsa did not know how often he took a deep breath today. Especially after Evan exposed all the grunts before him. Although there was no one else around, Karsa was ashamed and humiliated at the words of his friend.

It seemed like he could no longer consider Evan as a friend after today.

“That's all a fact you've known since we knew each other,” replied Karsa. Still with a calm expression. “But why are you complaining now?”

“Because before all that did not bother me at all.” Evan snorted and took off his glasses. Showing his eyes are quite narrow and look sharp.

Karsa knows the meaning of the gesture. Evan never tells him, but he realizes it himself after years of befriending the nerdy young man. However, Karsa never expected that he would watch Evan take off his glasses as they spoke with four eyes.

“Now I'm sick of seeing you.” Evan revealed himself the reason for removing his glasses. “You know that my eyesight is not that bad. I can still see quite clearly without glasses. And just this time I hope my view can be a little blurry.”

“Be careful with your words.”

“Why? Aren't I just a four-eyed neighbor who likes to be alone?” satirize Evan with his sharp tongue.

The arrow that was thrown along with Evan's words landed on the target in Karsa's mind. Instantly he understood the true trigger of their feud this time. Not only because of the difference that they will never be able to change, but also because of his indifference all along.

Suddenly Karsa was ashamed of himself. Even just to look at Evan he was not able to. Finally he turned his gaze, looking at the basketball court outside through the classroom door that was left open. His friends he knew from extracurricular Basketball were playing with a big smile, while he was here pensive to realize just how bad his attitude was as a friend.

Karsa always knew that his face was quite handsome and he was idolized by many girls his age. Because the people around him never stopped telling him that. However, Karsa thought he did not care much about that fact, because he did not like the popularity and title of the school's idol youth.

Until finally he too enjoys hanging out with the popular students and ends up staying away from Evan.

Of course it was not a problem, if only he had not insulted Evan unintentionally.

“No wonder.” Evan clicked his tongue while squinting his eyes. “We both know that you are not good at using your brain. Surely you can't afford to think that what you said could have made me angry.”

Evan must have said that with the intent to offend Karsa. And of course it works, considering Karsa himself is always not confident in his learning ability. Although he never once admitted to it.

Karsa deserves to be angry because Evan insulted him. Unfortunately, his right to feel humiliated has been lost because he hurt Evan first.

Finally, the young man took a deep breath. Intended to cool his head so as not to be easily carried away his own emotions. “Maybe I should leave you alone for some time, before going back to try to apologize,”. He said it not in a questioning tone, but actually he was waiting for Evan to tell him whether his thoughts were true or not.

“No need,” Evan rebut then. “No need only ‘several seconds’. I'd be very happy if you kept your distance from me. You have disturbed my life enough.”

Karsa clenched both his hands tightly. He should have guessed that Evan no longer had any reason to maintain their friendship. But still, he was surprised. No. gabe. More precisely he was surprised to find that his existence was completely worthless, and was only seen as a nuisance by Evan.

Evan did not realize, that a simple sentence is able to give a considerable effect to someone.

Everything he told Karsa would be the reason behind the young man's change.

“Then, I will no longer see you.” Karsa finally gave up. He did not want to argue for much longer. His body was already quite tired by all the graduation preparations he had been doing for the past few weeks. “But unfortunately, I heard that we both chose to continue our education in the same High School. Maybe we'll see you again.”

“I'll be the most unfortunate person in the world if I get to your class again.” Indifferently Evan said that before turning around. Leave Karsa just like that/

“Me too,” muttered Karsa after he left alone inside an empty classroom.

That day was really his last meeting with Evan. And unexpectedly, Karsa can still live out his days as usual, even though one of his habits has disappeared. It is customary to visit and spend time at Evan's house. I don't know how many times Karsa had to force himself not to turn to his former best friend's house.

Perhaps Karsa's subconscious still thinks that they are just keeping their distance for a while, and not breaking up the friendship forever. And Karsa let it stay that way. Because in the end he returned to see Evan in High School.

Karsa was pensive when he saw how friendly Evan was as he was chatting with Trisha in front of the 10-2 classroom. It was then that Karsa realized that his former best friend liked Trisha. This fact is enough to make Karsa happy, because finally Evan has a life like an ordinary teenager.

Unfortunately, Trisha likes Karsa.

***