The Cost of Trust

Living destiny

After being inside the ward, I was more comfortable resting. My body is asleep but my mind is far away. What am I going to do next? should I hold on? Should I give my husband a chance? I could only cry, crying for my unfortunate fate.

"Aziz, how's Dian doing?", asked Mama after arriving at the hospital.

"The doctor should give you a sedative. Looks like Dian is depressed mah, I'm afraid it's interfering with her womb. Her post-age is already 13 weeks mah!", replied Aziz.

"Yes Allah....Aziz....! Alhamdulillahot. You must take good care of your wife's child. Honestly, I was disappointed with your attitude. Disgusted by your animal-like behavior. Mama thinks lily's the right woman for you. But , your behavior is like that. My mom was disappointed.!"

"Sorry Aziz mah, Aziz khilaf. But the oath mah, not the slightest intention of Aziz betraying Dian. mamah know for yourself what kind of repellent Aziz every mama asked Aziz to marry again."

"Then, what about the foetus that Lili was born with? Your kid? "

"Well, please don't corner Aziz at this time. I'll think of a way out. Now we focus first on Dian ya mah.", Aziz said.

His mother left Aziz and entered the hospital Diandra treated.

"In.", call mama. I looked towards him. I don't know how I should behave. When I think of my mistreatment, I feel so hateful. But, I also saw the same disappointment in his eyes. Disappointed with Aziz. Was it because I was pregnant, my mom changed her attitude ?

"Mom's sorry for mama's mistake all this time to you. Maybe you think, mamah like this because you know you are pregnant. Not Di, not that ! Mom really wanted to apologize to you. Mama admits, mama's wrong to force you."

Then my mom sniffled too. While me? I'm still acting as calm as I can. Has mama changed?

"It's not just you who's disappointed. Mama is the same. Mom's son, blatantly refused when mama asked him to marry again. Mamah only wants the halal for Aziz. But , what reality? He made a big mistake behind us. And Lili, mom didn't think she could do that. In the past, Mama knew Lili as a good woman. " He was back crying. Hopefully this time, what mom said was sincere from her heart.

I still refuse to talk. A feeling of heartache and disappointment that was very felt in the recesses of my heart.

"Di, please forgive mama. Mamah won't hold you back if you can't forgive Aziz. But please, give your mother a chance to make amends!"

With a heavy heart, I want to talk to him.

"Dian sorry mama kok mah!", I said slowly.

Mama looked up at my face. My body in his arms. He was crying on my shoulder.

"It's a. ..it doesn't need to be like this!" slowly say. Mom wiped her tears.

"As a redeemer of error. After you get out of the hospital, stay. Mama will take care of you and your child as best she can.!"

"I mean mama?"

"You stay with mama, leave Aziz alone. Let him be aware of his mistakes! Mama was very disappointed in him Di!", said the emotion mama.

I'm confused as to what to do. On the one hand, we both felt disappointment towards the behavior of the same man. But on the other hand, I have to think about my son-in-law.

Oh Allah... How should I?

"In..., Mah.", said Aziz as he entered my ward.

My mom and I did not respond.

"Where are we, dear? it's getting better, right? The doctor said, tomorrow you can go home. tonight, let you rest here first!", he said gently rubbing my forehead. I'll clear it immediately. The disgust still haunts me. I remember the scene I saw this morning.

"Dek, mas sincerely apologize deck. What should I do to make amends?", he pleaded. Trying to grab my hand, but I don't want him touching me seinchi stuff.

"Well, sorry Aziz mah. I know, you're disappointed. But , really Aziz has absolutely no intention to make you disappointed!", he said bowed.

"After getting out of here, let the nursing Dian. Dian lives with mom. Mama didn't want to, seeing Dian tortured for always remembering your depraved behavior!" my mom meant it. Is it true that mom was angry with Aziz?

"Please don't separate me from Dian mah. Aziz please mah.", said Aziz memelas.

"Dek, please forgive the deck. Don't leave the deck. Mas please...!", mas Aziz cried. Convening beside my bed.

I don't want to see his face. I was afraid that I would feel sorry for him.

"Well, you better go home. rest at home. About tomorrow where I'll live, let me think about it."

"Yes back home, if there's anything call mama." mom said goodbye, out of my room.

Aziz was left standing next to the bed.

"Come out. I want to be alone!" i'm firm.

Mas Aziz looked up. Looking at me with a sad look.

"Mas wants your nemenin. What if you need something. How about..", his speech stopped because I cut his talk.

"I said get out....!!!", I snapped.

"Sir.".", his voice was clear.

"Go ! Get out of here! Just take care of your cheating woman who is also pregnant ! I can do it myself. I'm used to it myself. I ...huhhhu.", my tears can no longer be endured. The man who has promised to always look after and make me happy, who is only an orphan in fact, he gave me a deep wound.

POV Aziz

Outside Dian's nursery.

Oh God, forgive me. The great sin I committed hurt the woman I loved so much. My wife and my mother. If only I hadn't made that fatal mistake.

(3 months ago, Malang)

"Ziz, the hawaii here is cold gini. You know, I take my bini. all honeymoon. hahahaha ", said Ivan.

"Hehehe.iya yes. But kasian, if we work again our wife told us to wait in that hotel? The streets themselves would not be as good." I chimed in Ivan's words.

"Tuh said Aziz, Van. when we are busy in the field, we are now in residence.kasian lah", said Adam.

"Who's told to have a chit, rich we donk single. Aren't you Li?" said Siska asking for Lili's approval.

"Hehehe, got chit at home. If outside the house ngaku single kan gapapa. Yes no?", said Lili casually. Adam and Ivan responded with laughter.

Me, Adam, Ivan, Siska and Lili are a team. The five of us are entrusted with the project in this apple town. Siska is a single, career-mad single-born widow. And, the Lilies I know she's not married. My friends no one knows if Lili is my ex. They don't need to know, I just want professionals to do the job.

It's been three days in this town, tonight is the last night of our stay in this cold, poor town.

The five of us decided to do a small scale because our work was successful and went smoothly.

Siska and Lili were ordering food and food for all of us. After eating we went back to our rooms. Coincidentally, my room and the lily are next to each other. Adam, Ivan and Siska were in different hallways.

After I entered the room, there was a heat whipping my body. Suddenly I felt like I wanted to fulfill my desire. I remember Dian, my wife at home. I miss that activity very much. But what can I do. Dian is far from my reach. I feel tormented myself. As I was trying to gain control of my own body, Lili suddenly entered my room. Wearing red lingerie. Which makes my Saliva swallow. I'm trying to hold back my lust, I don't want to see it. Lili locked the door to my room.How did she get in here?

He's getting closer, approaching me. But his aggressiveness broke my faith. And , that heinous deed happened. Stupid me, Lili recorded what we did and I don't know.

I was exhausted after having a forbidden relationship with Lili last night, until I fell asleep.

I woke up when Adam banged on my bedroom door. I didn't find any lilies in my room. He's already gone.

"Wake up Ziz, breakfast .we wait down!", call Adam.

Unhardened. I got out of bed and cleaned myself in the bathroom.

I realized my mistake. O God, may you forgive me.

After taking a shower, I cleaned my clothes. After that, I got off and joined my team-mates.

I saw Lily's face at a glance, she looked ordinary as if nothing had happened last night.

"Lo woke up very early among us!", said Ivan. I just smiled thinly. I saw Lily playing her phone. After a while, there was a notification of incoming messages on my phone.

[Mas, today go home? What do I want to masakin?]

it was a message from Dian. Suddenly guilt overwhelmed me.

[Yes, whatever you cook must be my darling meal. Bawain Brem want to? Or apple chips?]

[What aja mas. You're healthy coming home safe for me is more than enough]

Dian.my dear wife, beautiful and full of tenderness.

[Wait on deck!]

Dian replied to her with a smiling emoticon and a thumbs up.

WhatsApp from mama.

[You're out of town again, Ziz? Same Lili?]

[Well, you know where?]

[Status wa Lilies]

Owh..iya, I saw that lili was indeed displaying our five photos in the green application.

[Owh.].

[Greetings to Lili, my mom hasn't seen her in a long time. Let me ask you, I guess she doesn't want to be your second wife]

[Don't mama's pantes say rich!]

[And mama Ziz's effort, rather than waiting for the barren Dian. Ga pregnant. What's wrong with effort. The important thing is halal, no adultery!]

[Sorry mah, Aziz doesn't like mama talking like that about Dian.] No more replies from my mother. Mama doesn't know, how Dian can get pregnant, I just rarely touch her because of my busyness who wants to meet her needs. Don't want to see a shortage. During her life, she had gone through difficult times.I don't want Dian to feel it anymore.

I continued my breakfast.Once in a while Adam and Ivan went to provoke our laughter.

My phone is back vibrating. Kurogoh my pants pocket.

I was shocked for a moment when I saw the video coming in on my green app. Astagfirullahaladhim. I looked at Lili nyalang. But lili just smiled looking at me who was emotional. I held back as much emotion as I could, until I could talk to him alone.

The breakfast that was not delicious at all. The five of us headed to the lobby. Don't forget I bought Dian's souvenirs, as I promised.

The plane arrived at Jakarta at 11 p.m. Out of the airport, we headed to our homes. But not with me and Lili. I intercepted him, I want to talk to him.

"What do you mean Li?"

"Well.gapapa."

"You're outrageous Li.!"

"Hey.mas my beloved Azizku. Did you forget or what? Didn't you also enjoy our intercourse last night huh? Don't be a hypocrite!"

"I don't know why I'm like that...."

"Yes you won't know, I've put something in your drink" she whispered slowly.

God, I deserve to feel that something is wrong with me.

"What's your goal like that ?" I'm still emotional.I feel like I betrayed Dian.

"From the beginning we met again, I told you I wanted you to come back to me. Even your mom agreed, right? "

"Your mind is out of your mind !"my snapping.

"Give up, sooner or later we'll get married."

"Don't expect you to marry me. I just love Dian, my wife!"

I left her, I don't know what she did after that, I don't know.

Arriving home, Dian greeted me with enthusiasm as usual. Dian was aggressive, probably because she missed me too much.

Her night, Dian tried to make me to 'do' but I refused her for tired reasons.

I know she's very disappointed, not that I don't miss my wife. I only feel guilty if I touch my own wife. And after that, I tried several times to refuse him. But , I can't bear it. I finally did it just to please my wife.