THE ANGEL I HURT

Thank you for our togetherness

"I'm sorry baby, I'd love to take you but I really can't cancel my meeting with my important client" Ray was lethargic.

Today I got Ray's permission to take Levi to papa's mama's grave. I waited and sat on the porch of his house.

Ray is eager to take Chaira to the tomb, but he gets a call from his assistant informing him that their important client requested that his schedule be changed to today before they return to Germany.

"It's okay baby, if you want me to cancel it to the tomb today" said Chaira.

Ray seemed to think for a moment. He did not want to disappoint his wife. He who asked her to visit the tomb and has been asserted by her. But now he also can't drive her.

Ray felt bad.

"No need baby, go with Darren. I let you" Ray said with a smile.

"Ray,,,???" Chaira confirmed her husband's words.

Ray nodded for sure. He believes that nothing will happen outside the boundaries because he believes his wife is good at taking care of herself.

"I trust you baby" he's slammed his wife's head.

"Levi's company visited his grandparents' grave" he continued.

Chaira nodded. In her heart she was very grateful to have a husband who was so understanding to her. He can accept his entire past well.

"Hi Dare, I'm sorry if I had to trouble you. I'm asking you to take my wife to the tomb. Please take her home later too. I really can't leave my job" Ray asked.

"Are you sure Ray?" ask me who doesn't believe in him to ask me to bring Chaira along.

"I'm sure you two can be trusted" Ray said.

"Well Ray, I promise I'll take care of him and bring him home" I promise.

I decided to get busy on my phone when Ray said goodbye to Chaira. He'll be going to his office soon. I purposely kept my eyes busy on my phone so I wouldn't see their affection.

I don't want my heart to be filled with jealousy. I am tired of being tortured by jealousy.

Ray's car has left the yard. Chaira walked up to me.

"Wait for Dare, I'm ready to be ready first" he said.

I just nodded. I was busy easing my heartbeat which was starting to tighten. I imagined being with him in one car.

Plus Levi our son is participating. I really feel like God arrived so well arranged for us to be together. Soon Chaira appears with Levi whom she has taken with her.

Levi who saw me immediately ran to hug me. I immediately carried her. The princess deliberately did not invite us because it was too small to be invited to the tomb.

"Don't forget to take care of your husband's honor, son" said Mama before Chaira came out to see me.

"Iya ma, Chaira titip Putri for a while ya ma" said Chaira.

Mama nodded. Chaira kisses the Princess' cheek and the mama's hand. My mom followed them to the front. Mama watched as I opened the front car door for Chaira but she refused.

"Sorry Dare, I'd better sit in the back" Chaira said.

I'm not protesting. I know he just doesn't want to get too close to me. She was trying to take care of herself and her honor as well as her husband. I salute.

But back the slinging ripped my heart. Guilt is eating away at me. Such a good woman I have accused no one.

You're cruel Dare,,,

My heart is chiding me,,,

I opened the back door for her. The front door I had opened finally closed after sitting down Levi who asked to sit in front.

"She is indeed a good wife and good at taking care of herself" inner mama who saw all that.

My car started to move out of the house and into the tomb. During the trip I managed to steal Chaira's eyes from the windshield.

He looks like he's on a prick. His hand continued to move the thread of prayer beads he was holding. His eyes looked out the window.

He's still like before. Graceful and charming.

"Where are we going?" ask Levi.

I immediately changed my gaze and answered my little whiz question.

"We're going to Levi's grandmother's grave. Levi hasn't been there, has he?" my many.

Levi shook his head. I smiled and stroked his head. I parked the car as we entered the cemetery. I went out and was about to open the door for Chaira but she had first opened it herself.

"Thank you Dare, I can be alone" she said subtly.

I comply. I opened the door for Levi and lowered it. He looked confused at the funeral. Chaira who had held Levi's left hand was waiting for me who was still locking the car.

I took Levi's right hand.

I held back the pain when I realized how well we were able to walk with each other like this. Right now we are not a whole family.

This should be a very happy thing when father and mother walk side by side with you like this, son, you know,,,

Again forgive me, Dad,,,

We arrived in front of papa mama's pusara. I crouched down and rubbed the navel and said my regards. Levi followed my movements.

"Papa,, mama, Dare, come bring Chaira and Levi, your grandchildren." Overshipped.

"I'm sorry Chai ma, pa, Chai can't continue to accompany Darren. But even so Chai won't prevent him from meeting Levi." Inner Chaira.

"I'm sorry, Dare pa, ma, Dare, just brought them here now. Dare is useless,, Dare disappoints papa and mama. Dare could not keep this precious treasure that Dare once had. Now that he belongs to someone else" my inner self.

"This is Levi's grandparents' house, right?" ask Levi.

I immediately wiped away my tears that had been running from earlier.

"Dear, my dear, Grandpa Levi's grandmother is already in heaven. Someday we will meet and gather together, son" I told him.

I didn't realize my words made Chaira look at us. I don't know what he's thinking that clearly he immediately threw away his gaze as our eyes clashed.

"Let's get Levi down first, we're just as praying for grandparents" said Chaira.

We pray in each other's hearts for my mother. Levi who did not understand just stayed silent while occasionally playing his finger.

On the way home the sleepy Levi slept on Chaira's lap in the back seat. I saw from the car glass back. Chaira looks like she's gently stroking our son's head.

I feel so sorry again. I felt like we were a chauffeur driving her employer and her child. No one's talking.

Why, baby,, why,,,

Why do we not know each other, then,,,

You're so quiet, you,,

Don't you want to ask me about how I feel about you,,,,

Don't you want to know what I've been through the last day without you,,,

Our actual journey was not so far away because of our silence. I was relieved when we reached their home safely.

I took over Levi who Chaira was carrying. I don't want Chaira who is pregnant holding Levi who is getting bigger and certainly heavier when she falls asleep like this.

What I did made our bodies very close. My son was standing very close to me.

I wanted to hug her and shed all my longing.

Our eyes met for a moment.

Oh my god,,, that's,,,

Those eyes were still very quiet and warmed my heart. I don't know when my heart can escape from the eye.

Chaira threw her eyes away from me. I immediately retreated and moved away with Levi already in my arms.

"Can you please take Levi to Dare's room?" pinta Chaira's.

" May "be brief and follow his steps straight to Levi's room.

" Ehh my granddaughter has come home" greeted the mother who immediately shrank her voice as soon as she realized Levi was asleep

He didn't want to wake Levi. I immediately put her to bed and kissed her forehead before closing the room door.

"Thank you Dare" said Chaira, who was standing at the door and did not enter.

"What's Chai for?" my many.

"Have been a good father to a child." he said.

I nodded not answering.

"I'm only good for children but not for you dear" my heart began to wistfully.

"Dare,, when are you going to catch up with Ray,, it's not good to linger on your own" mama's voice broke the silence.

I looked up and approached him.

"There's no aunt's plan" I replied.

"Do you want to know your aunt's son?? Beautiful, you know, not lost to Chaira" said mama Ray.

I just smiled and shook my head. Mama Ray is kind and friendly. He certainly also considers me his own family, so he used to say such things even though Chaira was also there.

I looked at Chaira who was busy getting the phone call. Maybe it was Ray who made sure I drove him home.

As beautiful as any other woman, no one will be able to defeat you my bidadar, Nothing will ever match your beauty in the eyes and in my dear heart, Let alone shift your position in my heart.

There will never be!!!

"Thank you for your willingness to visit the grave of papa mama Chai, it means a lot to me" I told him as he walked me to the door.

"Same as Dare" he replied gently.

"Thank you also for our togetherness today, it's enough to treat my miss to you. Take care of yourself and your health, I'll take the child" I said.

Chaira nodded.

"You changed Dare, May God always help and protect your heart to remain Istiqomah in HIS path. May you soon find a much better successor and be able to accompany you to HIS paradise" Inner Chaira.

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