THE ANGEL I HURT

Photos and Rings

Mama held my hand tightly.

"Dare, if you want to know everything, who is Chaira, or who is everyone you have a relationship with, you can start by finding out for yourself. Don't just believe in the word people don't care who it is. No exception mama,,, you should be able to find answers to all your questions" Mama softly said

"Stop asking people, ask yourself to your heart." continued the mother who kissed me on the forehead and immediately left me

I was thinking about what Mom said.

"Mama's right, all this time I have a myriad of questions that Rosa has never answered clearly, yaaa mama's right!!! I myself have to find the answer to my own question"

I'll get up soon. I started looking for answers to my first question. I opened the drawers and cabinets in my room. Every corner I open and I search, but I can't find it.

"where exactly is he keeping it? why did he not want to show us our happy moments?? " i was getting upset and exhausted sitting myself on the sofa in this room.

The whole room I've been unloading, but I haven't found anything I've been looking for. After thinking for a moment I went out and looked for Rosa but never found her.

"Where is he?? oh no, I can't ask him anymore. I have to find my own" inner self.

I rushed to the warehouse located on the top floor of my house.

"fuck!!!! locked" I said I found the door locked

I went back to unloading all the cabinets or whatever I thought was keeping the stuff I was looking for. Satisfied looking in one room I moved to another room. After almost all the floors and rooms I checked I still couldn't find it.

I walked back and forth on my own and kept thinking about where else to look. My steps were off as I went down the stairs. My eyes were fixed on a room at the end of the stairs.

Ceklekk,,,, a,,,

I opened the door to that room. The room Chaira had occupied before. I actually felt stupid going into that room but somehow my heart wanted me to go in there.

My eyes turned around to look at the entire room. There was nothing special about that room even it was more suitable for the maid room. It was so different from my room. But I don't understand why my heart wants to linger there for so long.

I put myself in that little bed. I felt the bed was not very soft.

"how can that strong woman sleep here. This house has so many rooms why did he choose this room?" I don't get it

I smelled a Chaira-typical scent on that pillow. Somehow I was so calm smelling the scent that it calmed me down and cleared my mind.

"Ahh, why do I miss her so much" my inner self

I got up and sat on the edge of the bed. My hand reached for the desk drawer next to the bed. I saw a picture frame placed upside down. I was curious to see and immediately took it and turned the frame.

My eyes wide. I can't believe what I saw. I repeatedly rubbed my eyes hoping my vision would be clearer to see who was in the photo.

I saw a beautiful woman with smiling eyes staring at the camera she was holding with her left hand. Next to him was a man who was kissing his cheek without turning to the camera. They both showed off a wedding ring that was coiled around each other's ring fingers to the camera. I recognize both. That woman I can assure you is Chaira, although women are more often wearing her veil when outside but I have seen her without a veil when there is only me and Rosa and herself at home.

What astonished me was the man beside her.

"me????" I kept thinking how I could take a picture with Chaira in that familiar pose

I looked at the date and time listed in the photo. It was the same date as my wedding date and the clock in the photo showed just a few hours after our wedding. I look at the ring in Chaira's day, as well,,

"it's exactly the same as the ring I'm wearing" my inner self as I look at my own ring.

My head suddenly hurt thinking about all the possibilities. I threw the picture frame into the bed. Then I backed away. I just looked at the photo from far away

"Chaira,, what is Chaira,,, then Rosa???

I took the picture and put it back in the drawer. I don't want Rosa to find that picture and keep it away from me. I closed Chaira's room door and locked her. I kept the key myself so that no one could get in there without my permission.

I sat on the living room couch waiting for Rosa and pretended I didn't see anything. I had already tidied up my room which was already a mess. I didn't want Rosa to suspect that our room was a mess.

" Hey, are you feeling better?"Rosa kissed me and sat next to me.

"Where have you been?" ask me to glance at some of the grocery bags he brought. She often asked me for money.

"oh I'm shopping for a mas,, some of our baby's needs and mine's too" Rosa said, twitching her tired legs

"You didn't buy me anything?" much

"ah mas what do you need, you're at home" he said again this time while massaging his nape

"i'm so tired of you, my baby, it's so heavy" Rosa complained

I just kept quiet and didn't answer.

"where's your wedding ring Ros?" I asked when I saw her ring finger empty without a ring

Rosa was surprised by my question. It seems like he's racking his brain in search of the right answer.

"ahhh it seems like I forgot it during the shower earlier mas, maybe still in the bathroom." he said quickly

"i went to the room first, mas, I want to rest first" she said nervously

"Find ring. I don't want you not to wear it" I said

"yes, yes, I'll find him" he answered, not so sure

I actually knew he wouldn't find the ring in the bathroom because when he broke into the room I didn't see a ring there.

"What are you hiding from me, Ros???" ask in my heart

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