THE ANGEL I HURT

Sweet thursday

Sweet thursday,,,

I'll get up and take a shower.

"Hana please my first schedule this morning is changed to 4 pm only. I need it this morning" I told Hana by phone.

"Ok Dare" replied Hana.

Although Hana is my secretary at this time but I still ask her not to need to call me by the name of sir when we are alone. Except when it's a formal event at the office.

Thursdays have always been sweet to me because today always brings me back to meet my soul jewel. Today I deliberately changed my schedule to meet them because I wanted to take Levi on the road or just buy a toy.

I purposely didn't tell Chaira that I was coming this morning. I immediately drove my car to Ray's house. I immediately entered when I saw the gate that was already open.

"Maybe they open it every morning because Ray's leaving for work soon" I thought.

Approaching the door I heard a loud scream. I recognize that voice. That's Ray's mom.

" Alhamdulillaaaaaaaahhhhh,,, Finally Raaaayyyyy,,, yes mama's boy is great!!!!" mama Ray's voice.

"Tokcerrr right ma???" this time it was Ray's voice that he was holding with a loud laugh.

"Raaayyy, you don't know mehazuu" said my bidad.

His voice sounded very spoiled and happy. Even during my marriage I never thought I'd hear him talk to me that much.

My wife was always polite to me. He's always graceful. Today I saw the other side of him laughing loosely and full of happiness.

I'm so happy my bidadar,,,, I,,,

I'm so happy for you, too, man,,

Maybe my decision to let you go was the right thing because you finally found your true happiness,,, you know,,,

With Ray,,,, uh,,,

I came back to say that word. With Ray, why Dare?? Why did you create a void gap between yourself and Chaira first?? Until finally without you noticing Ray came in and filled the gap,,,,

My heart was again pierced by my own question.

I heard Chaira's laughter again. My heart ached again because I realized all this time that I had not been able to fully make her happy like this.

It turns out that Ray is your true love, dear, Ray who is able to make yourself as a whole.

Me, I'm sick, baby. I was sick to realize it was so late.

"Let's let mama come with you guys yes, mama also want to know the development of this granddaughter of mama!!!" mama Ray's voice was heard.

Did I not hear wrong???

Mama Ray mentions the word development of grandchildren, grandchildren which means? As far as I know, Mama Ray does consider my son as his own grandson.

But if they are what he meant for what he wants to go with Chaira and Ray if only to see their development.

My son is home with him.

I don't get it.

"Dare,, Hi, why are you standing here? Come inside!!!" Ray who was surprised to see me stood up immediately greeted me.

Ray who initially wanted to get out to heat his car was surprised to see me who was standing pecking.

"Oh, I just want to see the kids. Do you mind Ray?" my many.

However, I still have to ask his permission. They're my kids, but they live at home and under Ray's watch.

"Of course I don't mind, but unfortunately we're all leaving this morning. Sorry, Dare, I thought you'd be coming in the afternoon as usual" Ray said.

"Oh yeah, I'm sorry if I didn't tell you first. I was just planning on taking Levi on a walk with me for a second, Ray. But if you guys already have an event I can postpone it. I can come again on Saturday" I said, although I was a bit disappointed.

Ray looked at. He seems to understand my feelings.

"If you want you can take him with you. We'll just go to the doctor anyway." Tukas Ray's.

"Who's sick Ray?" I was surprised because I heard everyone was happy.

There was no sound at all that was sick.

"Not sick, we just want to check the content of Chaira Dare" Ray smiled and seemed to smile was held so as not to hurt me too much.

Ray's a good guy. She certainly knew the news of Chaira's pregnancy would make me feel sick or jealous. Therefore he did not want to show too much how happy he was in the gospel.

It was only me who arrived dazed to hear the news. I don't know this time if I can pretend to be happy or if I have to show my pain.

"Se,,, se, congratulations Ray, "I can't go on with my words.

I'm really not willing to congratulate Chaira on her pregnancy.

In my mind, as Ray hugged Chaira,, Shadows when Ray has Chaira completely,, Shadows when Ray will moan spoiled when he sprinkles the seeds of his love,,,, and,,, Shadows as Chaira enjoys all that Ray has done for her, and,,,

I jijaluuuu!!!!!

I want to scream that word out loud right now. My heart was really burning imagining all that. I'm really sick to imagine Ray touching every inch of Chaira's smooth body.

"Thank you Dare, actually you don't have to say it if your heart is heavy. I know it's tough on you" Ray said understandingly.

I'm speechless. Ray is a really good guy. He knows how to react to me. His attitude that is so gentle and understanding I can awaken and lower my emotions.

Achaghfirullah,,,,, the,,,

Forgive me god for letting bad thoughts and heart disease come back to my control for a moment.

"Sorry Ray, I just, "I didn't finish what I said.

"Here you go, I want you to be happy with us. I consider you my family too. You're still an important part of Chaira's life. Chaira's life is my life too so I always accept you. I want to share my happiness with you too" he said.

I was stunned to hear that word.

Ray's words really slapped me so many times. When I still had hatred in my heart for him, he was already far above me because he sincerely regarded me as his family.

You really lost away from him,,,

That's why God gifted Ray to Chaira,,,

It is not you who are full of envy and prejudice,,,

You really don't deserve that angel Dare,,,

You're not worthy,,,,,, you,,,,

My heart is filled with the spicy words of my own mind.

"Darling, why didn't you tell me Darren was here?" Chaira who had just appeared reprimanded her husband.

Honey,,,,

you called him honey, you,,,

God, I take refuge from you from this whisper of jealousy, I don't want this jealousy to hurt her anymore, I don't want to hurt her by showing this jealousy of mine.

"Darren wants to take Levi on a road with him. I think it's better we allow it, baby" Ray said.

"Is Dare right?" ask Chaira

I just nodded. I have not been able to say a word because I keep busy to relieve my jealousy that keeps trying to rule me especially when I see Chaira's hand that is writhing spoiled in Ray's arm.

"You can take her Dare, just drop her off before or after lunch" Chaira said.

"In a moment, let me prepare the need first" my bidadar went straight in.

The two men faced each other again.

"Ray, can I ask you something?" shirihku.

"As long as I can grant it, I will fulfill it. What request?" ask Ray who doesn't want to be careless to say what I want.

"I'm just asking you not to distinguish your future affection for my child if your child has been born" I said.

Ray smiled.

"Actually I was surprised to hear this request of yours. How can you think that I will distinguish my love for them one day, for me they are all the same Dare, they are my children. I think you have the same thoughts as me. If I could assume your son was my son, why would you not be able to consider my son your son?" that spicy question came out of Ray's lips.

"Levi was born from Chaira's womb, I accepted it, Princess was not born from her womb but I still accepted it when Chaira decided to adopt it because she thought it was your son. Now I beg you, you too can think like me" Ray asked.

I again felt my facial skin being exfoliated. I'm ashamed not to be a bitch. I felt really bad in front of Ray.

"I'm sorry Ray," I said.

Ray just patted my shoulder.

Chaira comes with Levi ready.

"Ayaaahhh" Levi immediately shouted and hugged me.

Levi's presence and embrace warmed my heart, and I took her into the car after saying goodbye to Chaira and Ray.

"Happy Chai for your pregnancy, hopefully given smoothness and health" said I

"Thank you Dare" she replied, astonished that she had not told me.

He turned to Ray who blinked his eyes to signal that he was the one who told me. They waved their hands at me and Levi.

My sweet Thursday doesn't really taste sweet,,,

There is deep sorrow enveloping me,,,

But my Levi gave me a sweet smile and a sweet peck on my cheek,, and,,,

I'm sorry son, because I can't make us travel with you, Mother,,

Forgive me,,,,, please,,,

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