Evelyn's Regret

Thirty Nine

Eve looked on Noah with pity after the man finished telling her what happened to Shahira a year ago. On the other hand, there was a sense of awe that Evelyn could not stand the fortitude of Noah that was clearly drawn on her face. It turned out that the pain forged Noah into a more mature man with a calm disposition.

"Is brother hurt?" Eve asked softly with her eyes fixed on the man. A faint smile fell on Noah's lips, the man returned Eve's gaze.

"What question does Eve need to ask? Any loss will certainly separate a wound for anyone. But will it bring him back? I don't want to deepen Cilla's wounds by destroying myself for the loss of Shahira. Cilla has lost her mother, I can't possibly let her lose me too. I have to be strong for Cilla. Shahira did not need a cry of pain she needed prayer and sincerity from me to go to a better place for her" The face was so calm and clear, perhaps time had managed to wash her wounds. Or is Noah too smart to keep his feelings and not let anyone see his sadness?.

"Yes, Cilla is lucky to have a papa like you. Thank you for being strong for him. I lost both my parents in adulthood, I lost my way and felt like I didn't want to live anymore. Luckily I met you and Sally who made me feel like I had a family again. I can't imagine how devastated Cilla would feel if she didn't get to know her parents" Evelyn tried to smile, although he did not know what kind of smile in the midst of the pain that hit his heart.

Noah nodded his head. The man glanced at his watch, almost two hours they spent telling stories.

"Eve, thank you for taking the time to listen to my story" Noah felt bad that maybe Evelyn actually had an appointment with Satria but instead spent time with her, when they finished at the funeral, they decided to find a place to chat and tell the story that happened after their meeting three years ago

"There's no need to thank you, sister, I'm glad you want to share my story" Evelyn replied with a smile. Evelyn had the look in Noah's eyes looking at her like five years ago when they were still together. But the spotlight quickly disappeared before Eve could convince that the gaze was real, not just a hallucination.

"Where are you going? I'll take you if you don't mind Eve." Noah finally, a very tempting offer for Evelyn.

"Aren't you in a hurry?" Evelyn was slightly stale, not wanting to immediately agree even though there was not the slightest intention to reject the man's offer. This time he did not know himself?

"No Eve, there just happens to be no urgent work in the office. So I can relax a bit" Noah returned with a warm smile that made Eve feel so calm.

"Well then brother, if it's not a hassle I want to ride in my brother's car to return to the inn." Said Eve with a little embarrassment.

"Of course not to trouble Eve. Don't be so awkward, we've been friends for a long time" Noah replied. Evelyn smiled bitterly hearing Noah mention her as just an old friend. 'Hei Eve then what do you want?' It means to yourself.

The two walked to the car without making a sound. They seemed to be clinging to their respective minds, as well as throughout the journey no one took the initiative to open a chat.

"Still brother" Eve said as they arrived at the inn.

"Yes Eve, thank you for accompanying me today. Say sorry to Satria, maybe I interrupted your date schedule" Noah said in a guilty tone.

"Me and Satria have nothing to do, brother. There's no need to feel guilty" Somehow there's no point but Eve decides to be honest. There was a surprised lightning in Noah's eyes that Evelyn caught.

***

Evelyn stared softly at Cilla who was sleeping in her arms. He was eager to see the little girl had to lose her Shahira while she was in need of a full outpouring of love from a mother.

Evelyn's little heart couldn't resist when Noah's mom called her, asking her to come home because Cilla kept crying asking her questions. Her lips could not say no, her heart led Eve to immediately agree to the request of mama Noah.

"Who am I really in your eyes little girl? you even called me mama at our first meeting. Is my existence special enough that you cry out for my absence?" To be honest, Evelyn was even more afraid of her feelings. He was afraid that his feelings for Noah were getting uncontrollable and could not turn away from the man. Is it worth it if he comes back to hope for Noah?

Evelyn worries that if she goes deeper into Cilla's life it will make it harder to escape Noah's shadow, because Cilla and Noah are one entity. But being indifferent and stupid to Cilla's cry was simply not possible. His heart and Cilla's heart seemed to have been tied to an invisible rope.

Could it be because of the request of Shahira first? Evelyn gasped when she recalled how Shahira had asked her to stay and take care of the child in her womb. Could Syahira have been able to feel that his togetherness with Cilla will not be long?

"Why does Sishira have to go ? why does fate seem to deliberately bring me back to this state? is the punishment for my mistake not over until I have to go back to the circumstances that made my feelings complicated again?"

Evelyn's hand reflexively rubbed gently on Cilla's back as she squirmed slightly. The corner of Evelyn's lips lifted looking at the little girl who fell back asleep, the reddish plump cheeks belonging to Cilla so adorable.

"You're beautiful, like your mama. May you grow up to be a good and fun child like Mama Syahira" whispered Evelyn while landing a kiss on Cilla's forehead.

There's a happiness Evelyn doesn't understand when she hugs Cilla. There was a warmth infiltrating his heart as he looked at the tiny figure. His maternal instinct seemed to grow when he was near Cilla especially seeing the reaction of Cilla who seemed to need it so much. Is this feeling wrong?

****

Sorry update is long, there is a rush in the real world plus the mood of writing again freefall. Again not the spirit also to megehalu finally this part impressed somewhat maksa n no feeling. 😀😀

So please be aware that for some time to come will be on hiatus for a moment to finish the business in real life and rebuild the imagination that is scattered.

Thank you for being patient and staying faithful waiting for 🥰🥰😘😘 who chose to run away and remove from favorites or bookshelves with sadness I give you...😭😭😭

See U's