PRISONER OF LOVE LOVE THE WIDOWER

THE SEASON 5 Part 34. I'm Sorry Colin

I sit in front of Colin feeling guilty right now. I can't bear it, but it's more unfair to make my heart split like this. So this has to be done immediately. Maybe there's someone waiting for him out there while he's trying for me.

"You wanna talk? Why does it seem so heavy to say?"

"I don't feel guilty for you." He looked at me and smiled a little. He took a long breath.

"It didn't work. I know, sometimes you're not with me."

"I can't lie to my own heart, you're so good. But I'm the only one who can't, I'm the hard one. This isn't fair to you either."

"Yet you're together, who knows? I don't think he's in NY, you went out there all of a sudden for something."

"No, he just thinks I'm a friend now. He doesn't even want me around him if he can. But the reason I'm telling you this is because it's unfair for you to try for us, while I can't. I'm sorry."

"Hmm... if he still can't?"

"That's a risk of my choice. The stupidity I had to endure on my own without involving you. Mistakes are on my side. You deserve a better choice than to make an effort for me."

She's quiet.

"If he still can't accept you why are you still trying for him. Aren't you the illogical one..."

"My illogical heart is Colin. I told you I can only blame myself. My life may be more complicated than it looks."

"Did he know your life more than your own family?"

"We live in the same world."

"You mean both in the entertainment world."

"I can't tell you about this. I'm sorry."

"Are you involved in something dangerous?" He looked at me curiously.

...

Bye Colin 😘 Ntar mak cariin for you 😁 Udah dipesen amak se RT, kacian jd sweetener doang kali...

...this 😜 maap yaa...

...----------------...

"No. There's nothing to worry about." I smiled, Colin is good. He's still acting this well on me. A curious feeling surfaced as to why he could think I was involved in something dangerous. I remember meeting him on a task involving my target. But talking about it would make him even more suspicious.

I stayed away because even if we did, none of us could open up to each other.

"Colin, I'm sorry."

"That's it, there's nothing to forgive. Being honest and open is better. I know feelings cannot be felt. It's more unfair to imagine someone else being with me." She smiled wryly, I wish I could change my heart after all this time. But maybe it's my destiny.

"Just be okay." We talked for a while before he ended it.

"Thank you Colin. You take care of yourself too."

I finally solved one problem. My heart's relieved, at least I'm not haunted by any more guilt towards Colin. Maybe my brother will ask why we broke up later, but that's a problem I can explain without feeling guilty.

...----------------...

My schedule was full after I got back to NY. Practice and preparation show coloring my day. I'm planning on taking the film offer again.

I call Louis sometimes, but not often. He responded well I guess. There was no rejection of his tone.

But tonight I was stranded to Louis' house after calling Henry and confirming he was there. I miss seeing him again. He let Henry tell him he was there. Suprise. That alone makes me happy. He kept giving me a chance to be around him. Friends like he said.

A housekeeper opened the door for me when I came.

"Mr Louis is back at work?"

"Miss, I've thought for a week. But he obeyed the doctor not working too late. He's in the living room, sir already knows Miss is coming."

"Louis... You been good?" I see him sitting back now.

I sat next to her, she was already wearing a comfortable slouch, I wanted to hug her, as she sat on the sofa of the sitting room while looking at her tablet, acting a little spoiled to her. But maybe he'll be distracted. Let it be like this.

"Much better. There's food at the dinner table if you're hungry. You've been eating "He even told me there was food, asking if I was hungry . I smiled broadly because of that.

He was attentive as well, asking if I had eaten or not. I saw it, there was pizza and pasta there, still warm, they just brought it

"Thank you." He only saw me smiling widely but did not reply to my words.

This arrogant fellow somehow loosened his defenses. Is it very difficult to accept anyone other than his wife other than friends.

"When are you here?" He's asking now.

"Ehm is already from Monday, but my schedule is solid from the morning in a season like this. If you're looking for me I'm in your usual apartment but the average can be above 9. You've been there."

"You're in the office?"

"It."

"Your wounds are dry. You don't need to be wrapped in his chest anymore."

"No. Just still control the doctor again. Still can't exercise." It has been almost a month since that incident.

"You feel good?"

"I guess already. Unless you're not 100% fit, you still can't exercise."

"Good indeed..I'm glad you could work again."

She moved from the couch to the dining table now accompanying me to eat. I'm waiting for what he wants to say.

"You been here long?"

"Ehm, yes old, still rehearsing, recording for new season commercials. I might be shooting a movie in LA in about a month. Why are you asking? You want to go to LA with me." I smiled at him a little. I don't think he'll answer me as he usually does.

"I'm going to LA every month, but not for long." It was unexpected this time that he answered me. But the answer is equally annoying. Uncertain.

"Ohh really? You're gonna come visit me?" I want him to visit me of course.

"I don't know, just look at it later." Well at least he didn't say no. "No special job?"

"Yet. There's no schedule."

"How's your schedule for your special job coming?"

"Not necessarily, sometimes I've known from far away, sometimes directly within a few hours ever. Kelly arranged it. I just live the road with their scenario."

"You ever think about quitting?"

"Not for so long. Maybe because I like the taste too." She's staring at me

"You know we were brave enough to get married because we're not on the field anymore. We thought we were already in the office thinking about strategy, but it turns out there is still a past that follows us. It never crossed our minds." He still thinks about the past. Is not he still on duty now.

"Aren't you the same now."

"No. I don't have to pretend right now. That's a different thing. I'm installed as the CEO of the real company anyway."

"That's great. Your wife's killer's on trial?"

"First of next month. In his apartment, he found a lot of evidence about other murders. He's not gonna get away with some level 1 murder charge. It's been confirmed to spend a lifetime in a cell."

"That's a relief. After all these years you've been looking for no."

"Yes relieving. You know one moment you have to stop doing this dangerous job."

"Yes I know." Maybe I quit if we had a family too, can I think like that.

"Your boyfriend isn't mad you're here anyway." He asked about my girlfriend.

"I'm single. No girlfriend." I smile.

"Oh." He looked at me for a moment and shifted his eyes. Yeah, I know he won't tell me anything. His wife's killer has not been tried, let us be friends only, there is no point in rushing.

"The pizza is delicious, I've never tried this restaurant. How's Auntie doing. He's not here anymore?" I'm looking for another conversation.

"No, Mama would rather spend her time in the countryside. He comes but sometimes just dips away if there's no need."

"Your mom doesn't often live in NY?"

"Sometimes, I rarely think."

We talked together when this meal was fun. He accompanied me to eat. I don't think he's disturbed by my presence. That's enough.

"I want to go home, tomorrow I have a morning job I have to rest, you also have to rest. Thanks for the pizza." I got off the dining table.

"I'll just drop. Your apartment's not far."

"No need. Later if you're healed. Like you said it's not far." He was even willing to drive me. Looks like all the money I'm trying to make. "Hmm. How about this, if you're all right, would you take me out to dinner." Now he smiles to see me.

"You're good at bargaining turns out."

"agreed? Promise me." I did bargain.

"Yes fine." After a little force, he agreed.

"Don't forget to bring me roses." He grimaced widely and I waved at him.

He'll bring me my roses. It'll be a first date.

\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\=