Miss To Move Diary

Above the Longing

"Uhibbuki, please," he said.

He took something out of his hand, opened the small red box and placed it on the table right in front of me.

"The choice for you is only two," he said.

",,,first, accept me as your husband, or second, ready to be my wife?"

He raised his face again looking at me, without a smile.

I can't say anything. Can only be silent and full of confusion.

"Yevn,,," He finally made a sound after a long silence was created from the two of us.

"Me,,,,"

I couldn't speak anymore, and smiled at him.

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"Sorry,,,,"

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He looked down, as soon as he heard me.

"Are you really ready to get married?" I asked her, made her head rise to look at me.

Maybe he thought about the meaning of my question, or maybe my voice was so soft.

"Are you ready for the emotional instability and immaturity you would face if you chose me as your companion?"

He was increasingly seen guessing with a sentence that slid from my lips.

"Are you ready to marry a girl who can not love her partner, even though she has legal status in the bonds of ijab qabul?"

He looked at me more and more fixedly, waiting for the end of my sentence, guessing the direction of my conversation.

"I obviously did not want to sin, ignoring my husband's feelings when in my heart was still written another man's name. I really did not want to sin against my Lord and my husband for still imagining the face of another man. I certainly do not want to get the wrath of my Lord and disobey my husband someday when I cannot love and love him in a time that is somehow up to that time."

Test,,,, test,,,

, ,,,,Test,,,,

,,,*Tes*,,,,,,,

One tear in my eye dripped down my cheek.

I saw his face that was staring.

I don't know what's on his mind.

"Good father, I have great respect and respect for my father. You can easily accept my family and earn their trust. It's just it's about your trust in me and about my belief in myself."

Mr. Kavin is still silent listening to my chatter. Maybe because this time I was really 'talking about' something this serious.

And I feel that too. Just this time I was dealing with him talking about feelings so seriously.

What made him go silent?

Could it be that he could already accept the reality of this petrified heart of mine. About my inability to change my mind and to choose to back down to accept reality.

Or am I ,,,,,,,,,,

"Oiy, lion, where's your phone?"

Suddenly the sound of the balabala's cry distracted me.

I turned to the kuntilanak who suddenly appeared through the dimension of space and time.. 😂😂😅😅✌

I just glanced at Eva unfriendly.

Aware of getting my murderous gaze, Eva immediately heard a grin and retreated slowly leaving us.

I pinched my nose, my mind went back to my conversation and Mr. Kavin.

"If I can accept all that, how?"

I raised my head when I heard his voice. No, rather hear the question.

This time I was the one who was silenced by him.

"I can take it, doesn't mean I don't want to get your heart. But because I knew, that feeling would change, turning around from now on as time went on. I'm sure nothing will go to waste. Because only God knows how I put this heart."

Again I could only be silent with an erratic heart. Added to his shady yet sharp gaze.

Whatdoes thatmean?

I was too stupid to interpret the words.

"I like you because of God. And instead, I just hope to Him to get a little bit of your heart."

-Again,,,,

"What do I wish on man, especially man himself does not know what he feels. But at least he's aware of his ignorance rather than pretentious and pretending."

-, I was really made to shut up by this man in front of me.

"So when do we tie up our relationship?"

Didn't he hear my explanation from now on.

I'm not understanding this man's way of thinking.

"If you're really ready for the consequences," I paused.

"I'm sure the father was a wise man, and the father understood what I had said earlier. Hmm, I mean,, hmm," I doubt what I'm going to say.

"...bapak is still sane, right?" I closed my eyes as the sentence just slid.

He just looked at me in surprise and then laughed..

"So? your answer?" He asked me back. As if my question meant nothing, and didn't have to be answered.

"All right."

"All right?" Ask when I have not finished my sentence.

I just look at it with a little smile.

"After this, I'd better reflect again, and istikharah." My speech.

"May God give us guidance." Imbuhku again.

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After the afternoon from the office I stopped by the cafe tea tanic. Enjoy the gentle breeze, with the noise of the waves alternating.

I sat in the right corner of the cafe that was quiet, so as not to be disturbed by humans passing by.

I am not one who is so happy with the beach, even behind it.

But since being with the deceased even until now I actually spend a lot of time relaxing on the beach after the room that became the first place I liked the most.

Where the late brother Arfan used to take me to the beach, I enjoyed that time even though I did not like the beach.

Now, the beach became the port of my longing for him. With a wave that symbolizes my strong and intense longing, the wind as a whip and a touch of his affection.

'I love you brother, always love you,,,,

and,,,,

wait for me,,,,'

She smiled warmly at me with her sad look. As if answering my heart, asking me to be firm and he will always be here.

He's still sitting in front of me.

The wind made my veil move and occasionally fluttered.

I get this feeling, so warm and comfortable. As soon as my eyes slowly opened, he disappeared..

I'm alone, frozen stiff, I,

Test,,, the,,

My tears are one, though,

two,,, one,,

And I quickly swiped, I looked out at the high seas,,,,,, I,,,,

I truly live with longing, above longing and will always long,,,,

A faint visitor voice rang out, sitting with each other's fierceness.

When I turned to my left side, a pair of eyes were staring at me, no, no,,

but staring into my eyes, deep, like looking for something I don't know.

The sub-district group was busy chatting, whether since when they were there.

But he's the one looking at me, Mr. Kavindra. I smiled at him, and so did he.

Aware of the day getting late, I who was still wearing an office uniform chose to move from there.

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I refused, though,,

Connect,,,

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