Just A Wedding

Chapter 59

" Can you be loyal to me ?" he asked - arrived at me. His hidden face looked at me. He was looking for an answer he still doubted. Search and search for answers through the eyes. We stared at it for a few seconds. Letting him keep interpreting every millimeter of the part I have, fighting the corneal line of my eye. Find the truth there. There was much doubt in his net. Like a dry river in the dry season featuring the bottom of an arid riverbed. The barren land was split apart, not a single grass grew there. I can't guess how hurt he was. When his heart was as hard as the river slowly - the land began to dry up a little. He made his heart doubtful of the love life. It makes him dry even in the rainy season. Makes him quiet in the crowd. Makes him live with a feeling of emptiness in anyone.

" Will you one day turn to men younger than me?” a low-headed voice - the pieces sounded discordant in my ears. Ask questions that lead us to conflict.

He said, "Yes, you're young, you can do all the things when I'm not with you," as if to give him his own. It was as if I was fed up with what had happened all this time. But why me ? it's not me who behaves like that.

" Don't do that even if I'm not by your side, because it can make me numb even if we stick together."

His hands hugged my waist tightly. My fingers crept in, down strands by strands of her dense black hair. Letting him still be in my arms. Hiding his face back in my chest. A moment passed and silence remained between us. My fingers were still dancing - nari stroked her hair, giving her a taste that might be lacking. He moved slowly changing positions, laying (sorry ) his head on my lap. His left hand held my right hand, very tight.

" You're the second woman after mom to see me cry. How weak I am before you" he lamented with a face that hid and lay on my lap. It was like laughing at the situation he had made himself. Like a failed officer in the battlefield. Sobbing because laskar - laskarnya only stay name. Wanting to go home but ashamed of enduring a crushing defeat. Not going home where to bring yourself to step, while the feet rest on the opponent's ground.

" From childhood I did not dare to cry in front of my father because he got angry when he saw me crying. Only my mother cried, and that was the day of the feast. I'll be content to cry in his arms,"

" Why ? " i asked who kept giving a lap for him to lean (sorry ) head.

" It is inappropriate for men to cry" he answered, explaining all the stories. His hand took off his grip on my hand and turned to caress the Resilient face.

" He will be a strong man and not hurt in a relationship with anyone" he said to Tangguh

" What do you mean ?"

" I don't want my children to experience what I'm going through, betrayed by our loved ones" a heavy and depressed voice rang out. His neutrality was closed in tears. The corners of his net were left clearly visible to me, the details clear from drop to drop.

Why am I also sick and prone to see him like this. Another person I just found out about him. He whom I saw was a man with a million charisms and authority.

" I want to sleep a while. I'm really tired. Will you stay like this and put me to sleep like a child in your arms ?" pinta he let go of his sense of authority. His hand touched my hand gently propped it against his cheek.

" I want to stay like this. Don't you let go.....I'm really tired of everything, but I don't know who to complain to."

A soft snoring sounded from his lips. Tough Sepulas who fell asleep, Mr. Satrio did not move and changed position. This poor guy with a charisma mask is sleeping in a bed on my lap. Falling asleep with a net that still drains tears. Shivering because he felt oppressed by the hustle and bustle that made him have to still look tough even though many arrows pierced his body.

By dawn he woke up. I woke up because he was pulling away from me. He moved from the bed slowly. Keep my eyes closed, not because I was tired and sleepy all night keeping Tangguh and Pak Satrio who took turns delirious because of their dreams - each. It felt like I had lost the pain in my womb from taking care of them.

Mr. Satrio stood alternately kissing my forehead and Tough. Justifying my sleeping position, slowly laying down my body on the bed next to Tough. Stepping silently so we wouldn't wake up.

" Wake up papa child, do not be like mama after morning prayers sleep again," He quipped to me through Tangguh.

" Breakfast is ready. I made Capcay, your favorite kale and avocado juice."

I just squirm opened a little of my eyes that were not strong enough to resist sleepiness, while Tangguh was already smiling happily looking at his father's face. The hue of Mr. Satrio's face is as ever, handsome and dignified. There was no crying left last night, maybe he could be calm and cheerful. Like the law of nature, where the night rains heavily, the morning there will be coolness and peace.

He was this morning, tidy with a grey t-shirt wrapped in a long-sleeved light brown shirt and black jeans. Dense black hair neatly combed back.

" I want to take Jhoji to school and to the field for a while. You want to come to the field ?" bring him to me. " You don't want to know where your husband's money came from ?"

" I'm sorry I'm still tired next time I'm sure to come along" I said, declining his invitation.

He smiled at my answer. Hopefully He understands my situation, I am still tired and worried about my pregnancy.

" What to bring for lunch ? "

" Aren't we cooking ? " i asked him again in wonder.

" I......"

" Whatever you want to eat, I follow you," I replied slashing his words. I forgot there was a difference between us. In my family, cook once for a day. Unlike his family, every meal always changes menus.

" Are we going out to eat together ? What am I gonna take you to eat ? Get ready at half twelve I'll pick you up,"

He stood up from his seat at our dining table. Walked to the room to kiss Tough who went back to sleep after taking a shower this morning. I followed him and I saw what he was doing, a smile slowly coming to the corner of my lips. I really went through this morning full of joy as I dreamed so far.

" Aaaahhhhh.I forgot, I will send you shopping money every month through this. The pin is our wedding date" he said, handing me a debit card.

I couldn't feel my tears from being moved, more than a year into our marriage. On this day, he promised to give me some money to shop. Almost complete the happiness I felt. It's not perfect, but it's enough to make me happy. Step by step he and I will find where happiness is called.

Seriate......

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