Just A Wedding

chapter 41

Time goes on for so long for me. Don't ask me if Mr. Satrio contacted me during my pregnancy, which is already in the ninth month and just waiting for the day my son was born into the world. I have repeatedly told him that my content is fine. Every day I give him news.

I

Mas, I have eaten spinach and tuna vegetables for the health of our children.

Mr. Satrio

👍

There is no answer more than a hand emoticon that gives the thumb sign.

Or I'll give you news of my pregnancy.

I

Assalamualaikum says. Our baby midwives are healthy.

or like this

I

Mas, the baby wants to drink cold guava juice even though it is raining.

But the answer is always the same.

Don't ever imagine how I started getting pregnant young until I was nine months old. I had to stay between the painful memories of how she was present and grew in my womb. Often these feelings are uncertain. Sometimes I'm happy I'm going to have a child. My own son was born from my womb. But sometimes I have to hate it. Because he was at the wrong time. He should have brought me happiness. If regret and disappointment begin to hit. I started torturing myself and my baby. For a full day I can eat nothing. Not because of nausea or pregnancy problems, but I want her to disappear by accident. When my motherly feelings came up I cried out of touch with what I was doing to myself and her. I feel like I'm the cruelest mother in the world.

This baby seemed to understand my situation. From the beginning of pregnancy until now I have never experienced what pregnant women feel in general. I have never felt nauseous when I ate or smelled an unwelcome odor. I can eat anything. I can work every day without any problems. Maybe I've never even experienced what cravings are like the others. This baby seemed to understand and he also had to fight for his own life. Has he ever regretted being destined as my son and Mr Satrio ? As if he wanted to show me that he didn't want to burden me. Every time I check my womb to the midwife always cheerfully Esti midwife gives an explanation that she is a healthy baby and a lot of movement.

Why do I go to the midwife instead of the doctor ? Maybe that's what everyone has in mind. Isn't Mr Satrio the man ? He won't pay a dime about me and my son as long as I don't want to go with him. My self-esteem is higher than money. My feelings I choose more than to be hurt. I'm sure I'll be strong even if I live on my own money. I also tried to try everything I could to get him moved. Through the messages I always send.

It seems that Dita is starting to realize the situation of me and Satrio who are not in harmony. I never told Dita. Maybe Dita judged herself during my pregnancy Mr. Satrio never visited. And I never mentioned anything about Mr. Satrio either.

" Mr Arin...... mbak sorry did om Satrio never come to the house mbak ?"

Tanya Dita hesitated - hesitated when we were about to go home.

I smiled hearing his question. A smile that should look strong even if fragile inside.

" Mr....so it's true that Satrio never went to the house of Ms Arin ?" ask again by approaching me.

" A week ago I didn't go to Arin's house ?" this time Dita firmly asked. I just scrunched my forehead.

" A week ago several times Satrio played at the house om Rudi" he added slowly.

My heart was pounding hard hearing what Dita said. I wish I didn't believe what Dita told me. But, it's hard for me to do that. A week ago.....? A week ago did I not tell him that in these weeks this baby will be born. And he didn't give me any answers.

elakku switched the conversation to Dita without being able to look at Dita's face.

"I'm with you, Mas Rian today there is overtime can not pick up"

Look Dita's eyes with pity to see me without blinking. But I pat with a smile.

" h. ha..ha.no need Dit, ntar you return home" Tegasku refused Dita's offer.

" What's wrong."

" Why would Arin take that poly afternoon ?"

" So why not permission. ?"

dita's voice asked very subtly as if afraid to offend me.

" Willfully take the afternoon, will you want maternity leave" I replied with a smile on Dita.

We walked together to the parking lot. I can't resist Dita's desire to take me to Dr. Niken's control.

Patients polystyrene during the afternoon and evening hours is not as crowded as the morning. I've only been to the gynaecologist three times. When the third month, the seventh and now. The rest I chose to go to the midwife. I sat next to Dita who enthusiastically accompanied me. We talked - talked. Our eyes were on a very happy couple. Our conversation came to a halt with his familiar swipe reprimand.

" Hi..mbak Arin, mbak Dita."

" Ravi sir...sant his wife ? Dita familiarly also greeted. Hanin smiled cheerfully looking at us. I was silent as if I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Why was it when I was wrapped in the sadness that seemed on my face. I met Mas Ravi who had forbidden me from marrying Mr. Satrio and offered to wait for him. I glanced at Hanin's stomach which was not so clearly visible.

" Yes control, still four months" replied mas Ravi with a net direction towards me as if full of probing looking at me who was pregnant and why accompanied Dita. We looked into the eyes. I strengthened my netra to stare at the netra mas Ravi. Covering up what I'm going through, pretending I'm doing okay. Pretend my relationship and Mr. Satrio is very happy.

" How many months has it been ?" Say hello to Mas Ravi

" Nine mas, just wait for the day" tried to calm me with a question mas Ravi.

" His husband.......?

" There's business still outside of the city mas"

Dita quickly cut Ravi's question to me. I just kept quiet. Mas Ravi's question to me seemed to tell the truth about my relationship with Mr. Satrio. His faint smile as the conclusion of Dita's answer. Although Dita quibbled I can guess Ravi mas know my situation.

If I can be honest I envy seeing the affection of Mas Ravi and his wife Hanin. Not because I still have feelings for Mas Ravi, no. My feelings for Mas Ravi are gone. I'm just jealous, I want to be like them. I would love to have my husband delivered like everyone else. But those questions came back to me. Wasn't I the one who wasn't willing to go with Mr Satrio ? Wasn't I the one who rejected his offer for one roof. I took a long breath. I have to be strong with my own choices. But can't it cross my mind even at a glance. I wish I were in Hanin's position. Maybe I'm happy. And our baby is a baby born of love.

Lucky for me, because I didn't go into Niken's doctor's office for long. Sweet pretty face doctor Niken smiled at my arrival. Let me sit down to ask about my situation.

Seriate.........

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