Just A Wedding

Chapter 45

Assalamualaikum Wr Wb

Hopefully Arin's story will be a lesson to me for you loyal readers and for all of us. Happiness is not sought but felt by what we have. A soul mate is a destiny we cannot choose. But being happy for ourselves with our circumstances is our choice.

Keep smiling even if there are many wounds in the heart. Even though today is not what we want.

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Mr. Satrio put my little Tough with heart. Then smiled warmly at me who was sitting on the edge of my bed. I replied with a smile full of meaning and question marks.

" I'm sorry.....…"

Her bright net is glazed - glass. I still remained silent looking at him.

" Adrian's mother cheated again..........."

With an unstoppable cry, Satria immediately hugged me.

" Say ........ What am I lacking ?. All I've done for Adrian's mom '.

" But why do I still love her and feel like all her teenage years are gone from marrying me" Sorrowed her steeping with gentle intonation.

I just fell silent. I saw Pak Satrio's netra blushing with sadness. I didn't give him any comment because I didn't know what to say. Like silent prose without a theme. Like a narrative without content.

" I'll look for him here. I heard the news, Adrian's mother returned to her hometown because of her affair also from this city"

He said again by taking off his embrace.

I smiled, there was no longer any feeling in my heart that could make me sick because of him. No more shreds - sad flakes that could make me fall in the dark because of him. Only my regret, I guess at the beginning of his arrival came to my house because he wanted to see me and my little Tough.

I....must be strong - this handsome and mature man in front of me is not mine even though legally and religiously he is my husband. But over a year, I was together in a bond that was far from this word love made me realize. We survived only because we had our own desires. I who was reluctant and afraid to bear the name of the widow of one child. He covered his love story with Asri's mother. I am used to being hurt by him. Like a dagger that has been blunt can not stab but carry poison because it is rusty. His breath sounded loud and rough he exhaled.

" Do I have to divorce Adrian's mother ?"

" Do I have to apologize for my mistake of marrying him too young ?"

" What should I do with Rin ?"

Question bertubi - tubi continues to slide from his lips. But I still can't answer. I have to answer what with the blind love he has for other women. I'm his wife too..... I have feelings too.

" Here you go.. Better rest first besuk we talk again". Just a sentence that deviated from the material I said to him.

If it were me. What should I do ? What are you going to say ?.What are you guys gonna do ?

My dream is too high for him. I hope and hope that every day he will come with joy, because he misses Tough. But it turns out that what was wrong in his mind was only Asri and the children of Asri. I wanted to scream loudly at him. I wanted to say all I wanted to say. It was stuck in the esophagus, until it finally returned to the bottom of my heart. Hugger again. Covered again. As I already have - already.

Is it because I am so lazy to argue with him? Is it because I'm used to it without him ? Aaah.

Mr. Satrio followed what I suggested. He laid his body next to Tough. With his left hand he wanted to hug Tough.

Netra Pak Satrio could not be closed. turned back to me while saying with the same sentences.

" I'll look for you tomorrow "

be still for a moment

" If it's not there, I can ask friends' houses "

silent again.

I tried to stay calm as if rippling on the ground and spilling instantly. Like the eruption of Mount Merapi that came - arrived. Like a storm that can hit the coral - sturdy coral on the beach cliffs.

" Are Satrio not tired of being betrayed continuously ?"

A sentence I shouldn't have said, just blurted from my lips. The words that I had been keeping close together - the tightness in my heart was spoken straightforwardly uncontrollably.

" Aren't there me and Tough ? "

" Is that not enough to complete Satrio's life ?"

I was stammered - brick by staring at his netra. It was as if I had risen from a slump in a corner of the earth and soared high into the sky. I have to fight for my rights and my son's. I must realize now there is a tough who also needs his father.

" It's all your fault ....."

His answer was loud and his net direction directed at me grew sharper.

" My fault ? "

" why ? "

" it has nothing to do with me. Why am I being blamed ?"

I tried to defend myself with all the questions I asked him.

" If we're one roof, there's no way I still love Dik Asri"

" If we had a roof. I could try to love you "

" If we're one roof we can intensely meet"

He said he stood up from the bed. Pulling my body to stand up from my seat. Strenuously trying to get his face closer to mine. My hands violently resisted and moved away. I understand exactly what he's going to do. I took two more steps away from where he was standing.

" didn't you say you can't love me ?"

" didn't you say you can't do it with me, because you love Asri ? "

" I remember very well how mas said, marrying me makes mas love mbak Asri more and more" I replied not to lose.

" Ohhhh, one more. Didn't you say you regret marrying me ?

Mr. Satrio easily grabbed me and grabbed me. Not a hug of affection. Not a hug to achieve the happiness of husband and wife.

Mr. Satrio drowned me in his arms. His lips touched my ears and then said softly right in my ears.

" I miss you too, even if I hurt you "

His voice echoed to the bottom and my bones.

" I miss you too "

He said again with his hands holding me firmly. I tried to get out of his arms. But the more I tried the harder he grabbed me.

' Anyway we're still husband and wife. Where is my responsibility as a wife ?"

" Have you ever done your duty as a wife ?"

" Have you ever known my favorite food ?

" Have you ever known my favorite dress ?

" And did you do your duty in bed ? "

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seriate.............

Haloooo sister. Please give her criticism and advice.

The author describes Mr. Satrio as a handsome-looking athlete who is also a Filipino actor Ian Veneracion.

Here's another photo. Hopefully fits. Because each reader has their own views.