I WASN'T...

Undecided

I was pacing in front of the house fifteen minutes ago. I don't feel calm and I don't know who to complain to, except one person. However, the person I expected to be at his house, turned out to be far away.

The house next to my house looked completely dark. Not a single lamp was turned on. He left this morning and has not returned. I didn't dare call him, afraid he was busy. After all, my problem was not a serious one until I had to contact him as soon as possible.

I looked back, where the door of my house was brown, silent not budging. At the moment, Mom is not home. Mom will be home at about ten o'clock after her afternoon shift ends.

Finally, I decided to go in and clean myself up. A warm bath will relax me a little. Maybe plus enjoy ice cream while sitting relaxed in the living room?

The warm water is prepared quickly in the bathtub, making my mirror dewy. Without wasting any more time, I got into the tub, and enjoyed my free time.

My hand moved to split the foam created from the bubble bath I just bought with Rena a few days ago. The lavender I love fills the room.

Just a few minutes I enjoy the paradise of the world, my smartphone does not vibrate relaxed. I grabbed the smartphone I put on the small table by the door. Gilang's name is on his screen.

I took a deep breath, somehow it felt relieved when he called. "Hello?" my greeting.

"Deb, are you home from school?"

"Well at home."

"Gue called to check. The guy I sent anter lo home, doesn't fuck, does he?"

I shook my head. "No," I answered when I realized Gilang could not see the hood of my head. "Where is Lo?"

"My same kangen?"

"Sobbly!"

"Haha!" the crisp sound of Gilang laughter almost made my ears budge. "Gue still has business in Jakarta."

"Old?"

"Next night back."

"Aren't tired of going back and forth?" I feel worried. The journey from Jakarta to here takes almost four hours by road. It can be up to five or six hours if the road is busy.

"This kind of rich gue, it's impossible to drive yourself. Anyway, my car's big, I can put a spring bed in it if I want."

Hmh! Showoff.

"At school, did you meet Satya?"

I let out a breath. "There," I replied. "Gue's confused..."

Gilang remained silent for a while, giving me time to organize my thoughts. "Lo realized something?" Gilang asked in a soft voice.

I can't tell you this is a consciousness or what, obviously, it's been a real distraction. "Satyas... It's about our relationship going on and insisting that I'm lying."

"Lo is lying."

"Yes, I know!" sahut I'm upset. "Lo don't cut my story, dong!"

"Hehehe... Sorry, sorry! Go, continue!"

I rubbed my knees in the water. The foam that was once abundant, has been reduced. "Satya hurt me earlier in school," I spoke in half a whisper, as if someone could hear my voice from outside. "His heart... It's beating so fast! I thought he was going to have a heart attack!"

"So..." Gilang said slowly. It was like he was dictating what was on my mind, but he didn't want to mention it. He's waiting for me to admit what he's said before.

"Can it be said to like someone?"

I could hear Gilang's breath from across. "Indeed, you've never felt that way to your ex-boyfriend?"

"Either."

"Then, now you're still going to me? You still want to deny?"

I dare not answer. That's right Gilang said, if I don't want to admit how Satya feels. I don't want to believe what happened. One time, I've never made Rena happy. Rena has always been a good friend. Someone I've always relied on as long as I've lived. But, what now?

"Debi?"

"Yes, I'm still here."

"Lo want some souvenirs?"

"Lo again stupid like this, where can I give input. I want to talk about another topic."

"What can you bring?"

"What aja. I'm, right, rich. I can buy anything for you."

I smiled wickedly. "Gue wants you to come back here safely. I miss you, Gil. Go home, yes!"

"Damn!"

Tut, tut, tut, tut, tut!

Jaelah... Directly disconnected. Not fun! I want to hear that he is angry because he is ashamed. I still remember how red Gilang's face was the other day.

Feeling the warmth of the water in the tub had evaporated, I got up from the tub and immediately drained myself. I feel thirsty after a long soak.

The clock on the wall still shows five o'clock in the afternoon. Mom seems a little busy, because she didn't call from earlier. I'll have to cook dinner myself this time.

I opened the refrigerator, saw what materials were available there. Chicken meat? Hmmm, I no longer want to cultivate meat at this time. Too complicated, for me.

"Just cook noodles, huh!" finally that one instant food I chose. Mother rarely gave permission to eat instant noodles. Today will be a golden opportunity for me.

My smartphone is shaking again. Say again call. "What?"

"Do you like chocolate or vanilla?" Nyerocos.

"Vanilla."

"Vanila, Ma'am!" I heard Gilang's voice a little far away. Maybe he ordered something for someone. "Wear that box. Red color tape." I waited until Gilang returned to his phone. "Debi?"

"Yes, yes, I'm still here."

"Gue wants to go home!"

My forehead is wrinkled. "Come home?" reworked me. "Come back here?"

"Yes. Why why?"

"So you said, he's coming home tonight. Not thirty minutes ago."

"As far as I am, dong!" Gilang even nyolot. I rubbed my chest to prolong my patience. "Who else is it?"

I looked down and found the refrigerator door still open. It's worth it that I feel like the cold is coming out of nowhere. My left hand was holding a bottle of mango juice this morning. "You drink mango juice."

"Mom-made?"

Hm... This boy used to call me 'mother', as if his own mother. "Yes, it's made by Mom."

"Side for me!"

"It's just a glass. Buy it outside!"

"No want! I want some juice from Mom!" Gilang.

This one stone head, if invited to argue, will be a year away. "I'll make a new one. If you wait to go home, the juice now is not too good to taste."

"Who can make it?" Silang sounds very sad.

I so want to make juice mixed with laxatives so that he can be reduced to me. "Depends on the bribe you brought."

"Pudding?"

With just one word, the texture of the pudding was already smudged on my tongue. "Vanilla flavor?"

"That's it! I was just that, right? There's no way I'm buying vanilla underwear!"

"Hehehe," I grinned. This time, I forgive his mouth that does not know the manners. The laxative will not be mixed in the juice later.

***