Blue Berets

90. Guilt

Galih has no recollection of how long he has struggled with all his work. Making a monthly report is tiring but how else, he had to do what else this week had a riot and automatically Galih had to report what equipment was used and the condition of each.

Galih who began to feel tired stood up for a moment and stretched his body. Because the night was so late and his wife asked Galih not to go home if tired as a result Galih stay at the mess. He first cleaned up all his work and turned off the lights and did not forget to lock the door. He returned the key to the guard post then walked towards the officer mess where he lived before getting married first. Right now the place he was wearing must have been occupied by someone that's why he just slept in the chair in the middle room. Refined foam chair, padded with uniform that he folds Go to sleep.

***

Galih had ignored his phone since last night so when he woke up this morning in a state of aches Galih found so many chats ranging from groups to private messages. Instead took the time to contact his wife who yesterday he left in a condition not so healthy. Instead of being picked up by Kirana, it was her daughter who raised the call of Galih and started talking.

“Hallo Papa,”

“Lho Mi? How did you lift?” ask Galih.

“Mama is still bobok Pa, Mama's body is hot from last night. What's naughty adek Pa so Mama's sick?” asked Amira innocently.

“Fever? How is Mama now? Mi, who are you?” galih asked when he heard the voice behind his daughter.

“Sama Mama Lucy,” replied Amira then handed her Mama's phone to Mama Lucy.

“Hallo Galih?”

“Teh, how does Kirana say hurts?” ask Galih.

“Yes, a fever from last night can't sleep. But it's been lightening up compressed all night,” said Lucy.

“Kok until then..,” Galih murmur.

“Naturally so, right Kirana's body is being adapted to also receive her fetus. Nausea-nausea with fever is common if again the first trimester. Don't worry, ” said Lucy.

“Later if Kirana has woken up please drop pesen yes, I can just go home after maghrib later. Let him rest first too,” said Galih.

“Yes, he let it be here first. If he is home alone, no one helps him. Amira also has to go to school,” replied Lucy.

“Astagfirullah I forgot, Amira uniform tea is at home,” replied Galih.

“Easy, later I anter to home to change the new uniform leaving for school.”

“Ok deh, have nohun tea. If so I want to continue to sleep first daftar,” said Galih.

Galih was good for sleep but in fact he could not close his eyes at all. His mind kept thinking about Kirana who was sick.

“Bang, first time Kirana got pregnant kept sick Brother why?” batin Galih had unknowingly mentioned Raihan's name.

All day long Galih was not concentrated. Not because he thinks of his sick wife, but about someone else. In his heart there began to be a feeling of guilt that came out of nowhere. He suddenly felt so guilty and felt he had snatched something precious from Raihan.

Galih does know Raihan though not familiar, but Galih knows if Raihan is the type of person who will always look after and love anything that belongs to him as well as he can. In fact, Galih heard from Keenan how Raihan keeps Kirana feeling when he knows if Keenan is in Jogja and has both become members. He also hears from Keenan that Raihan once threatened to finish him off if he dared to take Kirana from his grasp.

In the afternoon, Galih, who was unable to concentrate instead of returning to Mama's house where Kirana and Amira were, returned to her own home. He even wondered why Kirana at this hour had not yet turned on the lights. He innocently opened the door and searched where his son and wife were.

There was no answer no matter how many times Galih called. After he gave up and thought Kirana and Amira might be going somewhere he sat down and drank a glass of water. He was silent before finally realizing that Kirana and Amira were at Papa Bagus' house. Even Galih himself drove them there yesterday afternoon after Galih got the news of his wife's pregnancy.

“Yes Allah thinks what I am,” said Galih who returned wearing his jacket then grabbed the car keys.

When I got to my mom's house, it was night time. Galih chose to park his car neatly so as not to block other road users and then stepped into the house. When she arrived, Amira was learning to write with Kirana while the others went nowhere.

“Ma? Where is it quiet?” ask Galih.

“Parents Lucy came home, so they went there,” Kirana said as she shifted her seat so that Galih could come sit beside her.

“How are you doing?” ask Galih.

“Alhamdulillah. Papa how? Any problem? How can I not focus?” ask Kirana.

“Ha? No,” the pretext of Galih.

“I know Pa, your eyes are out of focus,” Kirana said.

Galih. He did not want to argue with Kirana. After all, Mr. Aji also taught him not to argue with women or ourselves who will lose in a landslide. Galih just chose to put her head on Kirana's lap and her body she put down along the sofa. Kirana did not refuse, she instead stroked Galih's head so that her husband could relax and be a little calmer.

“Capek yes?” ask Kirana.

Galih nodded with her eyes closed. Kirana put her back against the sofa and continued stroking Galih's head while teaching her daughter who was sitting on the floor while learning to write numbers and letters.

“Papa, if tired do not bob in the pocket Mama, pity adek later,” said Amira.

Galih had a smile before she dropped her body and sat on the floor with Amira, “oh so yes Mimi now, I'd like to have adek. Papa can't be spoiled to Mama? Papa kangen with Mama,” said Galih.

“Papa is already big cook still spoiled,” replied Amira brings laughter on Kirana's face.

“Who said Papa is big? Papa is still a child,” said Galih.

“Ngak. Papa is already big.”

“Still small.”

“It's big.”

“Still small,” Galih don't stop teasing.

“Papa is big. Anyway Papa has grown up Amira does not want to know,” the little girl finally sulked and rose from her seat. He climbed onto the sofa then hugged his mother possessively.

Galih still held on to his place earlier. From below she stared at Amira who was spoiled in her Mama's arms while Kirana tried to give understanding to her daughter. Galih smiled but again he felt guilty so he decided to get up and go into the bathroom just like that.