Blue Berets

50. Fucking Boys

The morning after the morning prayers, Lucy tied her hair and went into Kirana's room. While he sleeps Amira beside Adnan who is still asleep after staying up late on his work last night.

Lucy is assisted by Mama moving Amira's crib to Kirana's room on the 1st floor. Lucy and Mama also arrange all the needs of Amira in such a way that Kirana's room looks neat even though there are many items in it. Lucy is very smart to organize things. He arranged everything based on his function. He put all Amira's toiletries in one small basket, while telon oil powder and so on he arranged them in a shelf placed next to Amira's wardrobe.

“It is done. ehh... Mama, according to Mama it is better this table is removed or moved? Kirana has not been on her way. She won't be able to reach this area using her wheelchair,” Lucy told her in-laws.

“Yes too, hmm while we just take it out first. Put it next to the tv only time. The table is not too big. The ones on it you have also moved to the makeup table all right,” replied Mama.

“Ok, I moved ya,” said Lucy prepared to lift her desk.

“Stop. Let me lift it. Don't you lift. If you are injured, keep you sick I am also a bother,” said Adnan who just came still with a distinctive face wake up.

“Abang. Who is amira?!”

“Papa. Here and there, hus hus your hands far away,” replied Adnan who began to lift the table that Kirana used to use to finish her work.

“Near tv, under stairs. Load it there?”

“It seems,” said Adnan immediately lifted his desk with a single stomp while Lucy put her seat in the corner of the room and put a basket of Amira clothes on it.

...***...

Kirana is waiting for Adnan and Lucy to come pick her up. Although her head was still heavy and her legs were limp, Kirana did not lose her spirit as she was already impatient to meet her daughter and husband at home. She was already impatient to hold Amira and hug her husband, letting go of the cramped miss felt.

“Along gate,” said Kirana as soon as she saw Adnan open the door of her room.

“Sorry, first lady use room unloading all the time,” said Adnan.

“Dih, I told you all waiting for me to unload your room here first settle the administration. Ngeyel anyway, bad luck would be,” said Lucy did not accept the blame.

“You are funny,” Kirana said with a smile.

“Kirana, before going home Brother wants to talk to you first.”

When this Brother spoke, suddenly the atmosphere became serious. Adnan had even sat down before him and continued to hold his hand while Lucy next to him started stroking his shoulder.

“What's Bang?”

“You've been asking why your husband never came here?” ask Adnan.

“What's the same Bang Raihan?” ask Kirana back.

“Your husband will never come here Ki, because he is no longer in this world.”

“Your gate didn't lie to Kirana. Now we go home yes, I accompanied you to meet Bang Raihan,” said Lucy.

During the trip Kirana just daydreamed. He's trying to shake the truth. He still believes that Adnan and Lucy are just working on it. It was impossible for her husband to suddenly leave. He had been in good health, nothing could make him die this fast.

Adnan pushes Kirana's wheelchair into the cemetery while Lucy stands next to him. After some time of entry, they arrived at a mound that had not even dried up. On it is a gravestone inscribed with the name of Raihan Dhananjaya. Kirana had now seen it for herself, but instead of crying she laughed instead. He still did not believe it and still considered if they were intent on pranking Kirana.

“Bang, we'll just go home. Bang Raihan must have been waiting at home?” Kirana.

“Kirana..,”

“Come Bang, Lucy let's go home. If you do not want to take Kirana home Kirana will go home alone,” Kirana said while trying to get up from her wheelchair but she fell and fell to the ground.

“Kirana, your husband is no more. We can't possibly believe you brought Kirana's death. It's surreal. Your husband died from a ruptured blood vessel in his brain. After taking care of you for a few weeks he finally died the day before you were declared out of a coma,” Adnan said.

Kirana cried but instantly lost her consciousness. Of course he was in shock. Who wouldn't be surprised to get this kind of news? Kirana was not happy with her husband for long. Kirana has not long felt the beauty of marriage with Raihan but why the promising man will always be there beside her is even going in a way that is so painful like this.

When he got home, no one dared to bring Amira closer to Kirana who continued to daydream. Raihan's diary was already in Kirana's hands at the moment. Kirana had just read her first sheet but had already thrown the book away. He even throws and breaks all the photos of Raihan he can see. All the photos of Raihan he ripped and he destroyed. Lucy just keeps quiet while trying to calm down Amira who is crying on the 2nd floor while Adnan goes down and tries to calm down the raging Kirana.

“Kirana...,” Adnan tries to call Kirana.

“You lied Bang. You said Bang Raihan would be loyal to me. You said Bang Raihan would always be there for me. But what is it?! He left Adnan too, he left me too. When are you all trying to ruin my life? When will you arrive?! I'm not strong, I'm not as strong as it can stand after being knocked down many times!” amuk Kirana's.

“After Keenan now Raihan. All men are the same. All men are equally as jerks. All of you, you have ruined my life. You especially, you are your Adnan police officer who is said to be suri tauladan to many people but in fact what?! You could even ruin your own sister's life. You made me like this. You separated me from Keenan, you forced me to accept Raihan anyway. Now that I can accept it with all my heart he leaves me. Is there any less suffering I have received? More mending you kill me. I would rather die than live this miserable life,” Kirana said.

Kirana. Adnan heard it all, but there was not a word he denied. Whether it was true or not but he understood that Kirana's current common sense would not be able to accept anything that was thrown from Adnan's mouth. Adnan tried to approach her, but she was unable to. He was afraid that his sister would be even more reckless if Adnan dared to step up.

Lucy finally approached. He went straight into the room where Kirana was and unceremoniously slapped Kirana's cheek so hard.

“Lucy?!”

Lucy didn't bully her husband. She pulled both of Kirana's shoulders so she would look at her, “denger Kirana! You say all men are the same? Does that mean your husband's as jerk as the man who raped you? Does that mean your husband is as cowardly as Keenan who just left you? Look at this Kirana, look! You should read it to the end. You should know that Raihan also feels hopeless with his illness. You know the reason he tried to hold on even until his last moment he was still thinking about you. But what did you say just now? You said Bang Raihan was a jerk? If he's a jerk he'll just leave you without giving anything to you and Amira.”

“Kirana, age no one knows. That husband of yours also never expected his departure so soon. He loves you, he's also been waiting for love from you for a long time. Bang Raihan would also want to live happily together with you and Amira. But fate doesn't say that. God loves your husband Kirana more. He may be gone, but see what he's doing? He made sure your life and Amira wouldn't be lacking. He even begged Bang Adnan to persuade Keenan to come to see you, so that you would have a priest who could guide you. So that you can have a companion that will help you finish your life,” Lucy said again.

Hearing Lucy's words made Kirana lose her power. He could only cry. Though she had imagined going into the arms of her husband just to let go of the longing and burden in her heart. Now that he's weakened he has no one else to lean on. He was forced to be strong alone when everyone knew he would not be able to.

“Why did Bang Raihan do that Cy? If he was going to leave, go. But why does he still think of me?” asked Kirana who had cried so hard.

“Bang Raihan loves you Kirana. Shelove you. That's why she'll always think of you,” Lucy said.